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Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto
#26

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-20-2015 02:14 PM)Easy_C Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2015 01:46 PM)manly5000 Wrote:  

This thread confuses me... seems like on a fairly regular basis someone will make a comment or throw a compliment my way about my physique, and never once in my life have I thought, "Gee, that's weird, is this guy gay?"

Gotten comments from all sorts of dudes and some women... older dudes, young dudes, thug-looking guys and everything in between. Then again, I am a rather large individual... but this is honestly the first time I've seen anyone equate "bropreciation" to homosexuality. Are we really that paranoid, gentlemen???

You probably would be if you lived in Toronto.

Hum...

Well I suppose you've got me there.
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#27

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-20-2015 01:46 PM)manly5000 Wrote:  

This thread confuses me... seems like on a fairly regular basis someone will make a comment or throw a compliment my way about my physique, and never once in my life have I thought, "Gee, that's weird, is this guy gay?"

Gotten comments from all sorts of dudes and some women... older dudes, young dudes, thug-looking guys and everything in between. Then again, I am a rather large individual... but this is honestly the first time I've seen anyone equate "bropreciation" to homosexuality. Are we really that paranoid, gentlemen???

I don't think we're "paranoid" at all. There are serious challenges to masculinity 24-7 in the Anglosphere so much so that most of the younger generation don't even know what it really means. Maybe your instances were exceptions, dunno.

The thread title is totally misleading and tries to equate the toxic femininity of Toronto and Canada as a whole with some sort of equal "toxic masculinity" which is just not the case.

And, honestly, I don't think it's "normal" for straight guys to be openly complimenting dudes on their physiques for the most part. Seems more like something that women do (and usually lie about it, as in "oh you look beautiful" to some 200-lb manatee).

2015 RVF fantasy football champion
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#28

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-20-2015 02:39 PM)Akula Wrote:  

I don't think we're "paranoid" at all. There are serious challenges to masculinity 24-7 in the Anglosphere so much so that most of the younger generation don't even know what it really means. Maybe your instances were exceptions, dunno.

The thread title is totally misleading and tries to equate the toxic femininity of Toronto and Canada as a whole with some sort of equal "toxic masculinity" which is just not the case.

And, honestly, I don't think it's "normal" for straight guys to be openly complimenting dudes on their physiques for the most part. Seems more like something that women do (and usually lie about it, as in "oh you look beautiful" to some 200-lb manatee).

I don't know about the whole "toxic masculinity" aspect of this thread, but in relation to physiques and compliments that statement seems like a very weird thing to say.

In the bodybuilding community it's just considered normal to have people compliment you on your physique every so often... never once have I heard anyone equate giving compliments with being a homo. Even after many long years spent on "the misc". Someone compliments you on your physique, asks you questions about your routine, and then you get into a fun discussion about fitness and bodybuilding and make somebody's day.

Just like if you have a hot car and someone compliments you on it. Just like anything that anyone can appreciate, really.

When the hell did it become "gay" in our society to pay another male a compliment about something? Someone saying "You have a killer physique" does not equal them saying "I want to suck your cock"....
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#29

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-20-2015 02:57 PM)manly5000 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-20-2015 02:39 PM)Akula Wrote:  

I don't think we're "paranoid" at all. There are serious challenges to masculinity 24-7 in the Anglosphere so much so that most of the younger generation don't even know what it really means. Maybe your instances were exceptions, dunno.

The thread title is totally misleading and tries to equate the toxic femininity of Toronto and Canada as a whole with some sort of equal "toxic masculinity" which is just not the case.

And, honestly, I don't think it's "normal" for straight guys to be openly complimenting dudes on their physiques for the most part. Seems more like something that women do (and usually lie about it, as in "oh you look beautiful" to some 200-lb manatee).

I don't know about the whole "toxic masculinity" aspect of this thread, but in relation to physiques and compliments that statement seems like a very weird thing to say.

In the bodybuilding community it's just considered normal to have people compliment you on your physique every so often... never once have I heard anyone equate giving compliments with being a homo. Even after many long years spent on "the misc". Someone compliments you on your physique, asks you questions about your routine, and then you get into a fun discussion about fitness and bodybuilding and make somebody's day.

Just like if you have a hot car and someone compliments you on it. Just like anything that anyone can appreciate, really.

When the hell did it become "gay" in our society to pay another male a compliment about something? Someone saying "You have a killer physique" does not equal them saying "I want to suck your cock"....

Fair enough but I think the difference here is that you're in the bodybuilding community and that's a whole other kettle of fish.

In the rest of the world it's generally not a normal thing to compliment another guy on his physique at least in my 40+ years of experience (anglosphere and FSU). Maybe if it's playful banter or in a gym environment, but in normal everyday life to me it would be a little strange. Maybe that's just me.

From my perspective I don't think it's a "weird thing to say" when considering the general populace. For your small subsegment it might be much more normal at least from what you are saying. In any case, I think you should realize that your environment is a very, very small part of the overall male demographic and your situation is a lot different that the "average guy on the street."

2015 RVF fantasy football champion
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#30

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

I don't know man, after spending time in Mexico and Brazil my experience there was the same as the USA.

Crazy what a difference individual perspective and experience can make, because no lie, I LITERALLY have never seen anyone equate physique compliments to homosexuality until right here, right now, in this thread on the RooshV forum. Not in my entire life.

Personally I enjoy those moments because I get to interact with new people and set them in the right direction, and I'm as straight as they come. But, as cliche as it sounds, your mileage may vary.
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#31

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

It's also entirely possible that the guy reacted that way because he thought the OP looked gay. If OP was following PUA advice about "peacocking" that's even more likely.
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#32

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Toronto has its faults but whenever I read these long paranoid screeds against the social/dating climate of the city I simply assume that it's the OP who's weird or unattractive.
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#33

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Toronto is funny like that. I used to go to Venice Fitness near Warden station and was getting tired of training on my own. I moved up to this fella and asked him to spot for me on a set . After that I asked him if it was ok for me to arrange to train at the gym especially on bench days. He said 'Sorry but I've already got a gym partner'. That's when I felt that Toronto may not be the right city for me....

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#34

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-20-2015 11:35 AM)TigerMandingo Wrote:  

Gay acceptance has made it harder and harder to make lasting friendships with other dudes.

^ This

It may not explain the whole dynamic, but I think sexual orientation signalling plays a big part here.

When homosexuality was still considered abnormal, homosexual men had 100% of the onus of signalling to other people that they were sexually interested in men. This resulted in all kinds of un-manly behaviour like limp wrists, sitting with crossed legs etc. which set them apart from heterosexual men (and over time became clichés for gay men)

Now that homo- and bisexuality has broken into the mainstream to such an extent that almost every TV series, movie or book features them, part of the onus has shifted to heterosexual men to signal that they are interested in women, not men.

I think we have a consensus that most men don't approach - they run passive game:
  • waiting for chances to open up in their social circle
  • a woman recognizing them for the great guy they are
  • some twist of fate that brings them together with a woman, like in the movies...
...when you're that passive, you absolutely can not afford that women around you think "maybe he's gay..."

Consequentially, you have to avoid situations like complimenting other men, spending your free time with men, etc., which would have been innocuous a few decades ago.

Not a biggie, but it undercuts male bonding to some degree - and adds up with the hundreds of other social changes that undercut male bonding, like no more conscription of men to a male-only military (speaking about Germany here), mixed education with mostly female teachers, everything boys are interested in having to be opened up to include girls etc.
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#35

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

"Just imagine growing up in a place like TO as a boy. Roosh paid a short visit - and look at the reaction he got. The petition is now up to 46,000 signatures. Men who grow up in this environment, are usually very toxic - meaning in a lot of deniable, scared, in pain, very insecure, emotional imbalanced and immature, - most have never had girl friends, alienated from family who keep thinking they are losers etc. Most men are caught up in the matrix and have not taken the red pill- hence they are think the environment they live in is natural and normal - and don't even question it. They do not realize just how distorted the gender dynamics is."

I'm sure glad I didnt spend my teenage years in Toronto, and I usually stay in Montreal for short periods of time. All that white knighting and feminism in Toronto sure sucks. I guess the indoctrination in Toronto starts in the public schools, which is why when I criticize Toronto, I get randomly attacked by Canadians.
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#36

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

I grew up in and around the Toronto area and still live here. I had/have never had any problems getting girls. There are tons of sluts in Toronto and the surrounding areas. Especially the surrounding areas. I think people who complain must be about 40, an immigrant, or really ugly. It's getting quite cringe worthy.

There seems to be a feminism problem now, i guess. I dont really notice it tho.
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#37

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

Quote: (08-19-2015 08:58 PM)x-it Wrote:  

We discuss a lot about toxic femininity -- but rarely about toxic masculinity. Feminism has found their own very supportive environment - and even though they are toxic, they are in their own space and hence their toxic nature seems normal to them - and they desire no change.

However, masculinity has also become very toxic - especially in Toronto and the rest of Canada -- more so than other countries I think.

Just imagine growing up in a place like TO as a boy. Roosh paid a short visit - and look at the reaction he got. The petition is now up to 46,000 signatures. Men who grow up in this environment, are usually very toxic - meaning in a lot of deniable, scared, in pain, very insecure, emotional imbalanced and immature, - most have never had girl friends, alienated from family who keep thinking they are losers etc. Most men are caught up in the matrix and have not taken the red pill- hence they are think the environment they live in is natural and normal - and don't even question it. They do not realize just how distorted the gender dynamics is.

I was at this business talk this evening - and after the talk I saw this young muscular black guy. I simply complimented him on his physique and asked him how much can he brench press. As I also go regularly to the gym -- and use to bench press 260 lbs. The guy immediately thought I was gay.

It seems you can't have a normal friendly talk with women and men. Such a messed up place TO is.

You never experienced this anywhere else ?

Just to get it out of the way, if you want to complement a man's physical appearance without freaking them out, just look at him and say at a medium tone "Worker man". Then we'll always be friendly. In the case of Toronto, we're not really homophobic, and we all know gays only make their passes at designated areas, like gay events or some joint.

Toronto is the most diverse city in the world. Toxicity in people can be found everywhere.

Being raised in Toronto, it was always believed that women from the north of here are whores, or even women that are easy. About women that are easy, this is typically true granted she's a promiscuous one.

Guy's in Toronto often wake up to the reality of feminism. For me it was in my mid 30's with a woman who was dangerously toxic beyond belief. When this creature still contacts me, I have a sense of fear all the while amazed to associate with such a monster. She doesn't change.

In a state of heartbreak, I set off on a process of self transformation, the pain was gone in a month. What helps is the study of psychological behavior. Part of mastering the emotion is to not allowing others to manage our happiness.

This monster I speak of once went to the University of Toronto, which is a feminism factory. After learning this, I saw similar attributes in my ex girlfriend, who also went to U of T.

For some Toronto men like any really, the red pill is forced down our throats by default, but it'll only happen when they've been mentally abused by their one sided woman and have decided to disband their relationship with the aggressor.

In my case, I was contently MGTOW. It was a place of serenity until I was introduced to ROK by one of the broken women at my psychology forum. She was hating on the women and tattoos blog, and when I saw it, I felt giddy and agreed with just about everything I saw all over that blog.

What's happening in Toronto is interesting. Women put up their shields and are on the lookout for guys trying to pick them up, while it boosts their egos to reject us. It's almost rigged to fail here, even though Toronto has the worlds largest Nightclub strip, if that's your thing.

Sure you'll find 'some' negative men in Toronto, it's not really an issue though.
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#38

Toxic Masculinity especially in Toronto

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