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Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?
#1

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Hey all,

I had a crazy experience tonight where I was embarrassed and disgraced in front of an entire bar crowd for no reason. I basically got banned from the bar and am now trying to brainstorm ways to fuck them over. This bar is arguably my top pickup spot so it definitely stings. I'll share my story below.


It was at the end of the night, close to bar close, and I was shooting the shit with one of my buddies. A bartender leaves his post and comes up to me and says "Finish your beer, you need to leave." I responded in a reasonable manner, "Ok, I respect your decision as an employee here, but can you tell me why I am being kicked out?". His response was "Stare at some guys instead". Confused, I said, "what?". He repeats the same thing a few times before saying, "You've been staring at that girl and you gotta go." Next thing I know, this girl comes up to us and points her finger in my face. "That's him!" she says. I have never seen this girl in my life, and after seeing her for the first time I would assuredly never stare at her. It's the end of the night so I don't even fight it and I leave. However, I made sure to turn around and flip that bitch off before I left.

Me and my buddy end up chilling outside the bar, maybe about 100 yards away. Next thing I know, this same girl is running out of the bar following us, talking shit. I basically tell her to fuck off when a bouncer from the bar comes up to us and tells us that we need to leave the area. In a very calm and reasonable manner, I say "Hey, I don't know what I'm being accused of here, but your bar does not own the sidewalk where I am currently standing, so you can't tell me to move. What is the issue here?" He responds with, "Hey, they're talking to the manager about you guys now, and I just want to help you guys not get banned from this place." This bouncer was a cool and reasonable dude, and I end up asking him why he takes this girl's word for gospel and why I am being attacked for no reason without anyone hearing my side of the story. He basically tells me to leave if I know what's good for me.

Fine. Me and my buddy walk a little bit down the road and cross the street where we run into a girl we know. We end up chatting with her for a bit when all of a sudden the original bartender that kicked us out has now walked down the street, and is yelling at me trying to start a fight. "Hey!! you got something to say?!!" he yells repeatedly. I'm a big dude but no fighter. I raise my hands and turn my back to him basically saying "leave me alone." He continues to talk shit and yell at us until our girl goes over to him and calms him down. My buddy and I leave at this point.

Afterwards, I find out why this all went down. It turns out that the crazy girl is the bartender's gf. A girl who I had a fling with was also at the bar and apparently was an ex-gf of this bartender. Earlier in the night, crazy girl tried fighting fling girl. I talked to fling girl for a bit, and crazy girl must have seen me associate with her. Due to her jealousy, she got her bartender bf to kick me out.

I can never go back to this bar again. The bartender is always there and was legitimately dropping his work responsibilities to walk down the street to fight me. The fact that this crazy girl is running around getting whatever she wants at this bar sickens me. I was not overly drunk, and was just chilling having a good time. She saw me talking to fling girl, flagged me as an "enemy", and got me kicked out and embarrassed in front of the bar staff.

I'm pretty fucking pissed off right now and I'm wondering what actions I can take from here. I really dislike being disrespected. My friend and I were considering talking to the manager during the early afternoon, but he'll probably just back his staff. I'm also thinking about just destroying them on yelp with a bunch of bad reviews from various accounts. Anyone got any advice on how I should proceed? I'm definitely a little riled up right now, but I'd love to destroy this place.
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#2

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

This sucks and it's obviously not fair, but there are two things to consider.

First, if they don't appreciate your business, do you really want to spend your money there?

Second, cooler heads prevail. Give yourself a month explore other venues and just enjoy life and after four weeks, decide on a course of action. You'll probably get more traction with management if you have a chat with them with a little distance between you and what happened the other night.

I'm the King of Beijing!
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#3

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Take a breather - retribution, whilst satisfying for your ego, is ultimately the weaker path.

Time to move on and find a new home base.
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#4

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Sounds like the well has dried up old friend, seems like it's time move on and find a new spot. You should talk to the manager though, he definitely isn't going to like that one of his employees chased you down the road threatening you.
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#5

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

That can't possibly be the only good bar in your area - although if your area is anything like DC, it might be one of the only good ones. Either way, move on. Even if something like this hadn't happened, that bar may eventually go downhill to cockfest status or fall prey to another similarly awful condition. Gotta have more than one spot out here.
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#6

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I've been kicked out of places for legit reasons. After a while they tend to forget. This was in the heat of the moment but when the heat goes away people forget.

Can you reserve a table and spend a bit of money, with a large group of people (and girls)? The manager will like you and you'll have that pussy bartender serve you drinks to your table all night. If that happens just act mature like nothing happened. The beauty in not giving a shit drives people crazy. If they refuse to let you in take your group and everyones money elsewhere.
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#7

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Email the owner, file a complaint, what the bartender did was unprofessional and out of line. The bartender does not own the bar, and depending on the establishment, might not have that much pull to ban you. The fact that the bouncer tried helping you out and that the origin of the fight is the bartenders gf (who all the other coworkers probably know is crazy) definitely helps.
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#8

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I would leave a Yelp review detailing this experience.

In my younger years, doing damage to the bar and/or finding the bartender and getting some buddies together and following him down an ally on his way home would have been my immediate reaction.

However, like Windom Earle said, retribution is ultimately the weaker path.

An honest Yelp review and a change of venue is in order. I assure you that the girlfriend and her bartender boyfriend have serious issues and will be brought down all on their own.

The Maximally Pathetic Schema: Xs who labor to convince Ys that “I’m not one of those despicable Zs!,” when in fact it is obvious to the meanest intelligence that the Ys see no difference between Xs and Zs, don’t care anyway, and would love to throw both Xs and Zs into a gulag.

- Adrian Vermeule
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#9

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Make sure to leave a Yelp review from within the GPS confines of the venue. That way you'll get a "Check in". Makes the review much more effective.
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#10

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I would give advice is for your next bar to do your due diligence and lock it down. If you you would of known or been good to the majroty of the bartenders and all the bouncers you always see then you would of had a way better chance of backup in that situation. Plus it is 100% for sure other staff heard about that storm coming and would of warned you to blucrne before things got to crazy.

If I frequent a bar I make a effort to get kown by the staff. It goes a long way for situations like these.

If you don't go out that much to put in that leg work then you need a rotation of bars.

As somebody else posted your well water went sour as your degrees of seperariein got way to small from likely the smaller look of pusssy rolling through.

If that broad you fuckrd prior knee the bartender then that is how she likely got hookups and shit prior, probably how she got in that night maybe. Most girls will stay away clear from what they call "awkward" situations of bruens bridges from flings and exes, literally they won't even walk on the same block they are so cowardly so I suspect this girl, all the girls, keep some open lines of communication open with the guy who started the beef - the bartender.

Live and learn. Let that bar cool down for a few seasons. Turnover is always high so maybe don't go around there for a few months (I am talking seasons...so around March 16') and most of that staff would of turned over.
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#11

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Go to a different bar. Expand your horizons.

If you are going to impose your will on the world, you must have control over what you believe.

Data Sheet Minneapolis / Data Sheet St. Paul / Data Sheet Northern MN/BWCA / Data Sheet Duluth
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#12

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I've seen so much dumb shit like this happen at bars. The staff will always back each other, because they have to work together. All it takes is one thirsty ass dude to cause problems. You gotta imagine how pissed this dude is. He's beta as fuck, and sits there all night watching some girl he had extreme oneitis for get pimped all night long, grinding on a ton of different dicks, taking shots with guys, giving out her number a dozen times, etc. all while he has to sit there and watch. And she does this shit in front of him, on purpose.

So by the time someone he doesn't perceive as a threat(or has half a dozen other bouncers with him) gives him one little excuse, he will lose his shit.

I had a buddy get 86ed because he dated the ex girlfriend of the fucking doorman in college like 6-12 months after they broke up. He'd have one of the other guys tell them they were too drunk and couldn't go in, even when 100% sober. This was the biggest and most popular spot in town, so that sucked when you're in college and trying to party with your friends.

Turnover is high though so once that one dude is gone no problems. The staff know he's a twat, and will probably tell you that once he's gone, but they have to back his play for now.

Best bet is to find a new venue, lock it down as Kosko suggested, and start to lift and box.
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#13

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Yeah dude at this point, leave a few bad reviews and wipe your hands of the matter. In the future provide yourself social proof so that this doesn't happen again. I have a favorite bar I go to, it's my favorite pick up/first date spot.

I always show love to all the employees just incase something like you experienced happens. I greet the managers, bouncers, waiters, and leave big tips especially when I roll through with a date and they've hooked me up with a table. It helps in situations where haters want to come fuck the good thing you have.

-CD
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#14

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#15

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

If I ever see that in a bar I'm walking into the bathroom leaving my message

[Image: $_35.JPG]

and walking out

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
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#16

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

You can't force someone to take your money if they don't want to. Another bar will be more than happy to take it.
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#17

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

Jesus is that a bar or a pre-school? Do they have a nun wandering around rapping people who misbehave on the knuckles with a ruler?

Rule #5 is cringeworthy. How many women who aren't fatties or uggos actually approach men? I'd wager almost none from what I've seen and experienced.
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#18

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

Eggad, i'd go to the bathroom and smear feces into a message that says, "F*ck you and your bar rules".

It's almost like they don't want people to go out.
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#19

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 03:00 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

Eggad, i'd go to the bathroom and smear feces into a message that says, "F*ck you and your bar rules".

It's almost like they don't want people to go out.

Owner or manager has to be a major chode. I'm not in the bar business but I do know that guys are the ones that spend money. Catering to the hyper-sensitive women and manginas doesn't seem like a winning business model to me

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
Reply
#20

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

If the place is going to believe whatever a crazy girl says, you're lucky all she said was you were staring and they just asked you to leave.

Imagine you hit on her, made out with her, were getting hot and heavy, and then you said one wrong thing and she accused you of "sexually assaulting" her, and they called the cops.

That place is bad news, stay away from there.
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#21

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 07:20 PM)PapayaTapper Wrote:  

Quote: (08-23-2015 03:00 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

Eggad, i'd go to the bathroom and smear feces into a message that says, "F*ck you and your bar rules".

It's almost like they don't want people to go out.

Owner or manager has to be a major chode. I'm not in the bar business but I do know that guys are the ones that spend money. Catering to the hyper-sensitive women and manginas doesn't seem like a winning business model to me

Actually the owner just died at the age of 42:

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/22/nyregi....html?_r=0

It would be unjust to celebrate simply because he wasn't game aware or had something against men approaching women. Also, some close friends of mine were extremely close to him and he was their mentor. As his cause of death wasn't mentioned, and given he was deeply entrenched in the bar world, I'd bet money it was some combination of cocaine, booze, and stress that did him in.

I've been tempted to write a FB post about it, something like, "He may have been a figurehead in the cocktail world, but who gives a shit when his lifestyle killed him when he had half of his life ahead of him. Instead of getting people drunk and having a problem with guys running approaches in his bars, he should have been lifting and doing approaches himself."

I'd lose quite a few friends though.

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#22

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

I just had a weird situation pop up. A staff member accuse me of flashing them. WTF. I think its a huge misunderstanding. I had people w/me all night. I didn't even come close to doing this.

I have the place locked down, but its a wtf situation. I thought it was a prank.

Its a locked down spot of mine. I know all the owners, managers, busboys, waiters and everybody.

I still have lot of shit to deal with. I need to go in an apologize even if i didn't do it.

Staff> Regulars > Girls > Dinner Guests> Guys.

Thats the hierachy. Learn it and earn it.

WIA- For most of men, our time being masters of our own fate, kings in our own castles is short. Even those of us in the game will eventually succumb to ease of servitude rather than deal with the malaise of solitude
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#23

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 07:33 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

Actually the owner just died at the age of 42:

http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/22/nyregi....html?_r=0

It would be unjust to celebrate simply because he wasn't game aware or had something against men approaching women. Also, some close friends of mine were extremely close to him and he was their mentor. As his cause of death wasn't mentioned, and given he was deeply entrenched in the bar world, I'd bet money it was some combination of cocaine, booze, and stress that did him in.

I've been tempted to write a FB post about it, something like, "He may have been a figurehead in the cocktail world, but who gives a shit when his lifestyle killed him when he had half of his life ahead of him. Instead of getting people drunk and having a problem with guys running approaches in his bars, he should have been lifting and doing approaches himself."

I'd lose quite a few friends though.

Yeah... that might feel good but sounds like it'd probably be socially costly. I bet some of the women would be publicly outraged yet secretly turned on though.

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
Reply
#24

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

This is part of the reason clubs and bars are dying ---- they treat their male customers like shit. Bouncers are usually obnoxious and pricks toward the men, especially during last call, while letting women do whatever they want.

I put up with this shit for a long time before it finally sunk in they have no regard for the male customers (even though we spend all the money). They dont get a dime from me anymore. They can all go out of business for all I care, since they won't even respect their biggest revenue source

Getting disrespected and angry at bars become so common for me I just stopped wasting my time at them.
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#25

Basically banned from my favorite pickup spot. What's my action?

Quote: (08-23-2015 01:24 PM)Veloce Wrote:  

I second Kosko here.

Basically, bars can either be a great ally or the worst kind of white-knight.

Bars treat female patrons like they shit gold bricks. Hot girls bring rich guys. It's a basic rule of nightlife. So women get an extra pussy pass to say and do whatever they want, to a certain extent.

Look at this stupid shit:

[Image: nyc-milk-and-honey-rules.jpg]

Look at #5. This is taken from a bar called Milk and Honey in NYC, a hipster-ish craft cocktail place. But I've seen this used in other bars too. Basically saying guys can't approach women.

Dumbfucks. How do they think the human race has made it this far? No matter how good the drinks are, avoid places like this and lock down bars that have more level headed and red pill views toward the mating dance.

Also, we're taking your account at face value. This is all assuming you weren't actually miscalibrated or "being creepy".

I always use to say that I can't be shocked anymore by anything related to our messed up gender dynamics anymore... well after reading this piece of trash I was like [Image: confused.gif]
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