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Jurassic World officially shit
#76

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-15-2015 04:32 PM)KorbenDallas Wrote:  

I thought it was good. The fact that it had a pro masculinity, anti-career slave cunt, pro family message makes it better.

It's the perfect movie to bring a foreign girl too. She won't have too much trouble with the english....lines are very basic.

The majority of Hollywood movies are going to be like that soon, because Asia is such an enormous market now - the Asian market for Hollywood movies will soon be a bigger source of income than the United States, if it isn't already.

Don't ever expect subtlety or nuance from most major Hollywood films ever again. Expect whatever dialogue and "plot" translates well into Mandarin Chinese.
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#77

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-17-2015 02:56 AM)etwsake Wrote:  

Now I've known for a long time that almost all Hollywood movies are formulaic, predictable, and DUMB.

But lately, it seems to me that movies are dumber than ever. I mean, just dumb as shit.

I guess it's easy to say that I'm just old and cynical and I'm only remembering the movies of my youth through rose-colored glasses, and that movies have always been dumb. I think that's mostly true, but it's not all of it. I think as the American public has gotten dumber and dumber, the movies have been dumbed down accordingly.

<snip rant>

At least I can always go back and watch old movies any time. OK, that's the end of my crotchety old man rant!

It's partly but not all because of that, it has a lot to do with my post above this one.

Because they have to adapt the movies to whomever is paying the bills. And in the future, that's the Chinese.
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#78

Jurassic World officially shit

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#79

Jurassic World officially shit

It's a decent movie. Way better than I expected and I'm generally hugely skeptical of big budget hollywood movies nowadays.

Whilst it relied way to heavily on CGI, sweeping wide exterior shots and orchestral music queues to evoke emotion, the overall narrative was plausible and engaging. The main dude was masculine and alpha without being too cliche and the main chick was hot.

My biggest problem was with that asian actor who played the CEO/helicopter pilot. His acting was atrocious.
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#80

Jurassic World officially shit

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#81

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-18-2015 10:16 AM)Dan Woolf Wrote:  

Yes, it was a red pill film. But that doesn't make it good film, not even a good popcorn flick.

- the CGI was as unrealistic as always, the first two films just knew how to hide it and make it look as good as possible (night scenes, rain, use many closeups of the T-Rex puppet's head etc). I mean, the raptors looked fake as fuck and even though the T-Rex was the one from the first film, it didn't look anything like it. They show off the CGI and it just feels fake.
- cringe worthy dialogue and acting all around.
- no tension whatsoever. Go back and look at the kitchen scene in the first film. Or even better, the T-Rex attack.
- the usual "I can't see what the hell is happening in this scene"-type of action sequences with shaky cam, quick cuts etc.
- overall, just a very stupid film. Obviously, it had to be, so people would flock to see it in masses, like it and then tell their friends about it.

Some good stuff also:

+ obviously, a huge commercial hit with red pill values and without SJW/feminist crap. Great.
+ some funny moments. "I will never leave you again!" "No, not you, him!"
+ some clever directing, like seeing a close up of a guy's face as he was getting eaten alive by a raptor
+ I got emotional a couple of times when the nostalgia hit too hard

Worth the watch, barely.

Agree with these points. Just saw it.

The action scenes look like shit. It reminds me of Star Wars episode 1 battle of Naboo, watching a bunch of CGI dog-lizards fighting a bunch of drones. You might as well be watching Saturday morning cartoons, and it's embarrassing that there are adults watching this shit and being compelled by it.

The themes and plot lines are beyond recycled. Not a single instance of originality. Just a slight twist would have been nice, but from the first 15 minutes you already know who is who and what to expect from them.

There's no development of tension, no character surprises, everything gets resolved in a neat, convenient, typical Hollywood fashion. And as mentioned, the dialogue is crap.

All that said, I was entertained, if marginally. I think if you're going to go in this direction with a movie, with obvious tropes and predictable outcomes, then go all the way.

SPOILER:

The scene where she pulls open her blazer and ties her shirt in a knot, as if to say, "I'm ready for action" is actually a great scene. One of very few in the movie. Like her shedding her stiff, officious role and embracing the more classic, helpless damsel role. They should have gone all the way with scenes like these rather than try to juggle too many elements at once. Is it an industrial espionage movie? Is it a movie about man taming nature? Is it a movie about a man prevailing under the most unlikely circumstances? Moviemakers need to pick one and go with it, because too many of these themes creates a muddled experience that doesn't allow the viewer to invest themselves and give a shit about the characters.

Referring to the scene above, with the chick adopting a more sexual role, they would have been much better off leaving this movie in the hands of Robert Rodriguez or Quentin Tarantino. Now THAT would be a fucking kickass movie.

Spielberg's best movies all involve suspense, character development, drawing the viewer into that character, a sense of wonder, a sense of loss, and triumph in the face of adversity. I'm thinking of Saving Private Ryan, Schindler's List, Jaws, Indiana Jones, and even the first Jurassic Park.

Jurassic World had none of this. I understand Spielberg didn't direct it, and I'm clueless as to why he didn't direct JP3 or this one.

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#82

Jurassic World officially shit

It's a dinosaur movie and of course the preamble is not overly intelligent from the start - being completely under-armed in the first place. On the other hand - if they had excellent military tech out there, then there wouldn't be much of a movie, but a couple of minutes of combat and then: "Who wants some T-Rex steak?"

Still - Chris Pratt was indeed a strong male character as was the older son, who hit on pretty much any pretty girl out there while having a sweetheart at home. Even the Indian billionaire had balls.

They even let the British female assistant die a rather prolonged death while getting thrown around by dinosaurs like a chewing toy. I wonder if they want to start society getting used to women dying. Also there were female SWAT team members in the first group that tried to capture the GMO-dino.

I wouldn't say that it was free from feminist influences, but at least men were still men there and that counts for something in the current propaganda of Hollywood. The texts however were extremely dumbed down as if it was written for 12 year olds - and not very bright ones. But I guess that happens when IQs are plummeting and hardly anyone reads anymore.
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#83

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-14-2015 08:36 AM)Maximummax Wrote:  

Stopped watching Hollywood movies long time ago

Comes into a thread about a Hollywood movie just to leave the above valuable contribution.

[Image: watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here.jpg]
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#84

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-21-2015 05:57 PM)LeBeau Wrote:  

Quote: (06-14-2015 08:36 AM)Maximummax Wrote:  

Stopped watching Hollywood movies long time ago

Comes into a thread about a Hollywood movie just to leave the above valuable contribution.

[Image: watch-out-we-got-a-badass-over-here.jpg]

[Image: hipster-subkultur.jpg]

He doesn't have the time to rub elbows with the plebeians after beard maintenance and finding new things to not to conform to.

God'll prolly have me on some real strict shit
No sleeping all day, no getting my dick licked

The Original Emotional Alpha
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#85

Jurassic World officially shit

I for one liked the movie. Lots of references to the first film that's the best one in my opinion. I felt like a 12 year old again and it felt great. Would have preferred Spielberg directing it though. Only he can truly capture those intense moments before all goes to shit.
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#86

Jurassic World officially shit

So I saw it today instead of seeing inside out. Won't lie it wasn't that bad. It had just the right amount of nostalgia and new content.

30$ well spent.
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#87

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-15-2015 02:03 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

Quote: (06-14-2015 09:12 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

C'mon, it was sequel #3 of a movie that was destined to have bad sequels.

It was worth a watch for what it was, but you can't expect Oscars out of these kinds of movies.

It's actually sequel number 4. The 3rd sequel had Grant back in it. Download it from the pirate bay. Jurassic Park 3 is so bad I wouldn't bother paying anything for it.

I don't follow them and doubt I've seen them all - and not the most crucial discussion - but wouldn't Jurassic Park 3 be considered the second sequel (and this one the 3rd)?

Correct me if I'm wrong or if I'm missing a movie, but I don't think the first movie is considered a sequel, right?

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#88

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-22-2015 12:13 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Correct me if I'm wrong or if I'm missing a movie, but I don't think the first movie is considered a sequel, right?

Right.

One of the stronger points of this one was it pretty much ignored the previous sequels. There's a couple subtle references to them, but for the most part it treats the time after the first movie as a blank slate instead of wasting screen time on connecting to the weaker sequels.
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#89

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-21-2015 08:32 PM)The Beast1 Wrote:  

So I saw it today instead of seeing inside out. Won't lie it wasn't that bad. It had just the right amount of nostalgia and new content.

30$ well spent.

30 bucks?! Wtf?

I hope you were at least getting some head during the movie

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#90

Jurassic World officially shit

Saw it the other night down here in Medellin. I enjoyed it for what it was, but it definitely never came close to the suspense and fear conjured up by the best scenes in the original. I was especially disappointed in the raptors. They looked like what they were, a bunch of lines of code on a computer. They were much scarier in the original, which I recently rewatched.

I also agree that whether a movie is "redpill" or not usually has next to no impact on my enjoyment of it.
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#91

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-18-2015 10:54 AM)Dan Woolf Wrote:  

Quote: (06-18-2015 06:45 AM)XPQ21 Wrote:  

Don't ever expect subtlety or nuance from most major Hollywood films ever again. Expect whatever dialogue and "plot" translates well into Mandarin Chinese.

This. Thankfully there are indies and foreign films and I still have a backlog of +500 old films to see.

But I don't get this. Furious 7 made 1.5 billion. Jurassic World will probably make over 2 billion. Seventh and fourth entries in franchises that were languishing. Do people think that "hey, there's been six movies of this before, so it must be good"?

On that note, interesting that in Japan "Fast and Furious" is actually titled "Wild Speed" (but actually "Wairudo spiido" when they attempt to say it). I assume because that title 'vibes better' with the Japanese market.

I have zero doubt that global marketing of movies has become an input into the script writing. Hollywood movies are basically a commercial "attention holding" product, and nothing else. They are the 1.5 hour equivalent of a click-bait link. That's why they have the intellectual content of a celebrity gossip magazine. A mishmash of snarky one-liners, explosions, dramatization of the trite, ultra-short darting-back-and-forth cut lengths, camera shaking retardedness, and zero plot creativity.

That's why they can get away with making the umpteenth remake of Batman, why Star wars was dumbed down and shitified from the epic original to the pile-of-crap sequels, why movies like The Matrix are actually derived from foreign sources (a comic in that case) and then vigorously dumbed-down to a "Keanu is a bad-ass... again... but in a different way this time" for general consumption, and why when Hollywood on rare occasion produces something that requires you to think (e.g. Inception) it stands out so much.
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#92

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-15-2015 12:16 AM)Moma Wrote:  

Expecting more from a dinosaur film is like going to a stripclub and expecting to hear a strip ho quote Chaucer.

[Image: laugh3.gif]

Yeah you gotta go into this movie with the right expectations, just some good fun action.

When they were first hinting that they used more than just dino genes on the main one I was hoping they spliced him with human ones. Make it have a level of intelligence closer to that of a person, that would've been cool as fuck.

"The price of being a man is eternal vigilance." - Kareem-Abdul Jabar
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#93

Jurassic World officially shit

I have a decision to make.

I can go see Fallen Kingdom or buy the original Michael Crichton novel for a few euros cheaper. I know which one is going to be heavier on substance, and I hate giving money to even Red pill-lite blockbusters like Jurassic World, but I like the film.

Which one? (For those not in the USA, its released everywhere else it seems)
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#94

Jurassic World officially shit

I remember going to watch Jurassic Park as a kid, putting on those blue and red cardboard cut-out glasses and watching the movie in a packed cinema. Incredible experience.

25 years later and the movie looks less realistic. The acting performances are terrible and the product complete and utter crap. At least it consistent with the other crap being produced today.
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#95

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-07-2018 01:45 PM)Syberpunk Wrote:  

I have a decision to make.

I can go see Fallen Kingdom or buy the original Michael Crichton novel for a few euros cheaper. I know which one is going to be heavier on substance, and I hate giving money to even Red pill-lite blockbusters like Jurassic World, but I like the film.

Which one? (For those not in the USA, its released everywhere else it seems)

I'd watch Fallen Kingdom. I'm going to see it myself next week. I've been a dinosaur nerd all my life so there's no way I'm not going to pay to watch this one. I also enjoyed Jurassic World immensely and unless I'm missing something I found it to be very red-pill; career-woman has slow realisation that she's a cunt, masculine male lead who's not afraid to be an asshole, etc. I hear there's a female paleontologist girl-power character in Fallen Kingdom and reviews are praising her, so I've got a bit of a sinking feeling on that one .....

However, the director has talent and from seeing all the trailers (which may as well show the whole movie by the way!), I can see he has an eye for making dinosaurs terrifying again (the Baryonyx claw in a haunted house scene).

Going back to Crichton's novel, I'm a big fan of his ideas and I like the science-heavy themes he writes about. However, he is a very economical writer and low on description. I remember reading it the first time and finally getting to a T-Rex scene and he literally describes it as 'having a box-like head' or something. And that was more or less it! I was fucking gutted. But that's no attack on Crichton, I just want more dinosaurs in my dinosaur books. You can get it from next to nothing and I see it in charity book shops all the time. Buy the book and watch the film! But don't blame me if the film's shit!

‘After you’ve got two eye-witness accounts, following an automobile accident, you begin
To worry about history’ – Tim Allen
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#96

Jurassic World officially shit

The millennial girl is an ugly sexless mean bitch called Xee or some shit, spends her time giving everyone a dressing down but interestingly has to get other people to do things as she seems quite powerless.
She has a male counterpart who is intimidated by her, weak and scared of everything.

With the exception of Chris Pratt, the men are either strong and bad (but easily overcome by said women) - or good and pathetic.

The women and Chris Pratt are the only ones who are both strong and good. Of course a small girl is a ninja who can outflank a genetically engineered 'indoraptor' super weapon (?) The female lead shrugs off a giant claw through her femoral artery and limps around saving the day for everyone.

Its totally unbelievable, the dinosaurs look fake, it thinks its Shutter Island crossed with Harry Potter crossed with Game of thrones crossed with Bond - its a fucking disaster. The film had me laughing it was so ludicrous.
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#97

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-08-2018 04:22 AM)Bienvenuto Wrote:  

The millennial girl is an ugly sexless mean bitch called Xee or some shit, spends her time giving everyone a dressing down but interestingly has to get other people to do things as she seems quite powerless.
She has a male counterpart who is intimidated by her, weak and scared of everything.

With the exception of Chris Pratt, the men are either strong and bad (but easily overcome by said women) - or good and pathetic.

The women and Chris Pratt are the only ones who are both strong and good. Of course a small girl is a ninja who can outflank a genetically engineered 'indoraptor' super weapon (?) The female lead shrugs off a giant claw through her femoral artery and limps around saving the day for everyone.

Its totally unbelievable, the dinosaurs look fake, it thinks its Shutter Island crossed with Harry Potter crossed with Game of thrones crossed with Bond - its a fucking disaster. The film had me laughing it was so ludicrous.

Oh dear, does not sound good. I'll have to give it a go cos I love dinosaurs, but if shit, it will get The Last Jedi treatment; no re-watches, no blu-ray purchase etc. I also happened on this Empire review that says;

'Claire 2.0 is more engaging and sympathetic — and yes, she wears sensible shoes this time — while Owen’s more brash, chauvinistic edges are rounded off.'

https://www.empireonline.com/movies/jura...om/review/

Unbelievable. I liked her just fine in heels, and Owen's 'brash chauvinism' was just how every male lead was up until recently. Can you believe that Empire review was written by a man!? Don't click on the link, they don't deserve it.

‘After you’ve got two eye-witness accounts, following an automobile accident, you begin
To worry about history’ – Tim Allen
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#98

Jurassic World officially shit

There's another Jurassic Park movie? I'll download it, but hot dang I didn't even know it was being made, or out.

"A stripper last night brought up "Rich Dad Poor Dad" when I mentioned, "Think and Grow Rich""
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#99

Jurassic World officially shit

Quote: (06-08-2018 04:22 AM)Bienvenuto Wrote:  

The millennial girl is an ugly sexless mean bitch called Xee or some shit, spends her time giving everyone a dressing down but interestingly has to get other people to do things as she seems quite powerless.
She has a male counterpart who is intimidated by her, weak and scared of everything.

With the exception of Chris Pratt, the men are either strong and bad (but easily overcome by said women) - or good and pathetic.

The women and Chris Pratt are the only ones who are both strong and good. Of course a small girl is a ninja who can outflank a genetically engineered 'indoraptor' super weapon (?) The female lead shrugs off a giant claw through her femoral artery and limps around saving the day for everyone.

Its totally unbelievable, the dinosaurs look fake, it thinks its Shutter Island crossed with Harry Potter crossed with Game of thrones crossed with Bond - its a fucking disaster. The film had me laughing it was so ludicrous.

The girl-power is toned down somewhat.

SPOILERS

But aside from that it's social justice garbage - the evil rich people converge like in the The Last Jedi - many are evil Russians - and they all want to buy the poor dinosaurs to create weapons! Yes - exactly weapons! As if 5 ISIS fighter pick-up trucks with heavy machine guns would not make meatloaf out of all the dinosaurs.

So Marxism anti-Russian propaganda down.
Evil white guys leading it - never mind that the oppressed dinosaurs later eat even the female auction guests and not a tear is wasted on them.

Anti-humanist angle prevalent - they release the dinosaurs to the world and they spread out like wildfire. Never mind that it is not likely since back in their time there was a massive 20% CO2 atmosphere concentration (and we could breathe then as well) that created massive plant growth feeding the herbivores which in turn could feed the huge carnivores. Without those huge plants, then there would be no huge herbivores and without those the giant rapacious carnivores would have to eat huge amounts of humans or other animals which are not there! And good luck "living with them" when some of them can grab your granny and your daughter for quick mid-air lunch. Then you have giant ocean-based dinosaurs which would eat entire boats and tens of thousands of surfers and swimmers. In addition you had the heat back then and the tropical climate - humanity would at best leave the herbivores around in some areas while incarcerating all carnivores as most of them are way too powerful to run around.

Humanity would eliminate dinosaurs quickly and capture the rest in very closed-off zoos.

Chris Pratt is fine and masculine, the woman is a bit de-fanged in this one. I guess that is why feminist don't like that part, though it makes for a better movie.

And they added the SJW comics trope of the nerdy low-T IT black guy. Was about time that this would be shown.
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Jurassic World officially shit

At this rate the franchise will only have one option - zombie dinosaurs...
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