[Fortis]

Sup Playas,

I was wondering if you guys have dealt with anything like this before. I met a chick on OKC a few weeks ago, exchanged numbers and tried to set something up for last sunday. She comes down with a cold and cancels, but she offers next Saturday as an alternative. I agree, thinking she's cool for actually trying to meet up and not be a 100% flake. Friday rolls around, and she asks if we can do Sunday because her friend needs her to babysit at the last minute. At this point, I'm thinking she's a flake waiting to happen, but I agree given that I left my sunday open specifically for dates.

Things that confused me:

She was really cool via okc and text. Like, super cool. She was into a lot of the same books, movies and video games and we would text eachother once in a while unsolicited about things. It seemed really natural. She would randomly text me shit like, "hey, hope your day went well" and such.

The shocker:

I drive to pick her up (she's 15 minutes from me) for our first date, but she's a total awkward weirdo.


I call her up to let her know I'm outside and she sounds pretty happy to be hearing from me.

She pulls this whole aloof, weirdo thing on me. She talks very quietly and doesn't make eye contact at all. She has her arms crossed the entire time like I've done something terrible to her. I try to start conversation but the most she'll do is say, "me too.....that's really interesting.."

The only time I'm able to get anything out of her is at the bar when she asks me if I"m religious (I'm not) and she goes on this whole tirade about how the church is a white man's thing (meanwhile she's half white/half asian) that doesn't serve the classes and peoples it is forced upon. At this point, I was seriously considering just getting up and leaving her, but I had actually driven her 15 minutes to the venue we were staying at, so I was just so fucking pissed. If she was just some random who had driven herself I would have figured out she was an asshole 10 minutes in and bailed.

It was the most boring grueling hour of my life. I don't care about the 20 dollars in drinks, I just want my hour and a half back.


What gives with this? I had no warning sign. The only thing that let me know she may have been a cunt was that she was flakey.

What can you even do in a situation like this? I know that next time I think a girl is a weirdo to just get the fuck out and not even bother trying to meet up.

[Windom Earle]

Hot weirdo - pump and dump (or keep purely as a FB).

Not-so-hot weirdo - charge your lost time to the game.

Sometimes a lack of social skills belie their bedroom skills, and if you had gotten her in the sack and she was in fact quite skilled in that regard, you'd forgive the gruelling lead-up.

[Sonsowey]

You just discovered texting is different than real life.

Good.

If you aren't feeling a girl let her know and leave.

"Hey I'm not really feeling this, I'm gonna go, take care."

[Fortis]

^ I drove her to the bar, so I couldn't dodge her like that. I've done that before with girls who met me somewhere.

[WesternCancer]

a girls online persona is purely a reflection of her self perception. This is why you see so many girls on okc with interesting profiles: well traveled, good art, funny, confident etc and when you meet them they're full aspergers.

This is also the reason why neon haired freaks can screech about the patriarchy and cis het scum, but will wait until they get home to tumblr about the creep on the bus instead of actually confronting the guy.

Most girls have incredibly poor social skills. we just think they don't because they're hot.

more often than not a girl on a first date is just as anxious as the beta trying to nice guy his way out of the "friendzone" I've had many a girl be seemingly cols like this, even completely avoiding eye contact, then an hour later I was balls deep in their pussy

[Fortis]

I see what you guys are saying. I am used to people being a little different, but it was like two different when I look at her spergish behavior contrasted with her ability to seem alright online.

I have expert experience with spergs because one of my best friends is a sperg, but this chick was just a straight up weirdo.

She was cute, like maybe a 6.5-7, but holy shit. She was either super cold and socially retarded or just a cunt. I'm slightly shaken by this encounter if you can't tell. But I find it funny at the same time; like, where the fuck do they make these vapid simulacrums of a human being?

All the same, I'm pleased with my ability to go, "wow. I NEVER want to see this chick again." If this was a few years ago I would have totally tried to ignore her shitty behavior simply because I wanted to get laid and had such a scarcity mindset that I didn't feel I could do better.

Chalk it up to the game and learn to deal with it or just learn to walk away.

[coverdoc]

(03-22-2015 10:58 PM)Fortis Wrote:  

I see what you guys are saying. I am used to people being a little different, but it was like two different when I look at her spergish behavior contrasted with her ability to seem alright online.

I have expert experience with spergs because one of my best friends is a sperg, but this chick was just a straight up weirdo.

She was cute, like maybe a 6.5-7, but holy shit. She was either super cold and socially retarded or just a cunt. I'm slightly shaken by this encounter if you can't tell. But I find it funny at the same time; like, where the fuck do they make these vapid simulacrums of a human being?

All the same, I'm pleased with my ability to go, "wow. I NEVER want to see this chick again." If this was a few years ago I would have totally tried to ignore her shitty behavior simply because I wanted to get laid and had such a scarcity mindset that I didn't feel I could do better.

Chalk it up to the game and learn to deal with it or just learn to walk away.

Ran into a girl like this last summer. Told her straight up after like 30 minutes: " You know, you're kind of fucking weird haha" She mellowed out after that and every time she did something weird i'd just tell her instantly. Became a really good fuck buddy and someone I still chat with occasionally.

-CD

[whateverfuckit]

(03-22-2015 09:32 PM)Fortis Wrote:  

The shocker:

I drive to pick her up (she's 15 minutes from me) for our first date, but she's a total awkward weirdo.

If you do online dating much, you'll find this happens a lot. These are women who have no social skills, but spend everyday practicing banter with virtual "friends" online. They have a great personality----as long as you never talk to them face-to-face.

[LINUX]

I want to know more about the religion thing?

That's funny.

[Fortis]

^ I can't do the rant justice, but it was the usual "lololololol all religion is dumb" tripe you hear from pseudo-intellectuals. I'm not religious, but I actually get along better with religious people than I do combative atheists.

[Slacker101]

(03-22-2015 10:28 PM)Sonsowey Wrote:  

You just discovered texting is different than real life.

Good.

If you aren't feeling a girl let her know and leave.

"Hey I'm not really feeling this, I'm gonna go, take care."

This is why I'll sometimes call people I've met from Day game, or online. Much easier to tell what a person is like and if they are interested. Plus most don't see it coming. Honestly, it's worked as well as texting. I haven't noticed an increase in flakes or anything. It does throw them off, which can be good.

[MY DETROIT PLAYAS]

With day game, you are only interacting with a chick for a few minutes and during that time you don't learn much about her conversational skills much less if she's a Stage 5 clinger. Easy for her to come across as a well adjusted socially adept person and not the super entitled ball buster that she may actually be.

Online it's easy for chicks to create outsized persona's that they couldn't possibly live up to anyways. Getting a chat in over the phone can help diffuse some nervousness and help you scope out her personality, but most prefer text over phone no matter the age. I always try to screen for compliance. She can be as quiet as a church mouse, and even a little standoffish. As long as she is following my lead, things will transpire in my favor.

It's a crap shoot, but I'm of the frame of mind that if I can get her out in the 1st place it's a great sign

From there, anything is possible

[Fortis]

^ You have the right attitude sir. I should have not taken it so seriously. I'm just new to the game (10 months), so I was like "who the fuck does this bitch think she is." I'm a unfriendly when I feel like someone is trying to play me. I gotta learn to roll with the punches.

[OregonToSoCal]

This should be a poster example of how important it is to get a woman out on a face to face date as soon as humanly possible and not waste time doing the whole texting back and forth. I've been burned by these types in the past too. On the flip side I've been pleasantly surprised at some of the ones who had zero personality over text and were a joy to hang out with and fuck.

[Fortis]

^ I've found that to usually be the case. Most decent looking girls are terse as fuck over text, so I don't take it personally. Only the really young ones show any emotion via text, but they usually learn to become more guarded with age, so there is that.

Lesson Learned: Push hard, even when shit seems fucked up.

Bitches be lying about their personality.

Drink Vodka tonics and act like an asshole if you're stuck with an asshole on a date.

[Off The Reservation]

I let a major misrepresentation slide and had to pay for it later.

Assume there are more if you discover one so early.

[BassPlayaYo]

You don't know anything about women until you actually meet them in person.

[XPQ22]

You ran into a standard issue OKCupid serial dater, sounds like. Anyone who has done the online dating thing for any length of time will go on multiple dates like this. I know you say you've been shaken by this encounter but definitely don't let it. It's no commentary on you - I've been on multiple dates with weirdo sperglords like the one you describe.

The shortest OKC date I had was about 8 minutes, the girl walked into the coffee shop and met me, immediately started texting with her friends, gave me a sarcastic "uhh whatever dude wtf why are you talking to me lame idiot" reply to every sentence I said, and then got up and left before I had three sips of my coffee. Who knows why? Worthless to even ponder.

You should have trusted your gut instinct to leave. If and when you have more experience with online dating, you'll quickly get a sense for the girls who are wasting your time in person, or are actually looking for new dick.

Just get up and bail on them. At this point I don't even try to make excuses, I just smile and say "Hey, thanks for meeting me but I don't see this going anywhere." Then eject. 15 minutes, one drink, no harm done.

Just FYI I've never banged a girl who flaked on me and then rescheduled, ever. It might happen at some point and I always keep my options open, but it's a terrible long shot.

[Burt Gummer]

From the other OKC threads:

Dont let the convo go more than 4 rounds after opening her to get her number.

Text her to see if she responds then call her. Have good vocal training(speak from gut).

Calling on the phone should root out someone as weird as this girl sounds.

2nd what XPQ22 and OregonToSoCal said

[Fortis]

uh, guys, did you really resurrect this thread to tell me what I learned last year?

[Rhyme or Reason]

Quote:

When chicks misrepresent their personalities?

AKA: Chicks existing.