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Clubs VS Other Venues
#1

Clubs VS Other Venues

Hello from a newbie and a total noob when it comes to game!

Recently I've started going to clubs regularly. However, I noticed one thing. It's so much harder to pick up girls at clubs because you can't have a conversation with them (cuz the music is so loud). You either need to be a very good dancer or super jacked to get a girl's attention without talking to her.

Also I'm a bit confused as to how you approach a girl on the dance floor? Do you ask her if she would like to dance when it's so hard for her to hear you, or do you just signal with your body movements even though you suck at dancing.

I mean usually when I go with friends, I get to dance with them. But yesterday I went alone, and didn't dance with a single girl. I was in the club for 4 hours! I mean the club was super packed, so I did dance, close to, next to, in front of several girls with a lot of touching. But then that touching was happening with everyone cuz the club was so packed. I wasn't really sure if they wanted to dance with me as they were in groups and were better dancers than me. Also fear of rejection was at an all time high last night. So I just lingered close without actually dancing with them.

When the club was about to close, I went and sat in one of the lounges where the music was less loud and you could have a conversation. I noticed that for me, this provided a much better opportunity than the dance floor. Maybe I'm wrong based on the small sample size that I have. But most of my past pickups have been conversational. I think it's time I give day game another shot.

At any rate, what is your take on this? Do you guys prefer venues where you can have a conversation like bars, lounges etc or do you think loud clubs are better for gaming?
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#2

Clubs VS Other Venues

Quote: (03-22-2015 10:12 AM)gluukaka Wrote:  

I mean usually when I go with friends, I get to dance with them. But yesterday I went alone, and didn't dance with a single girl. I was in the club for 4 hours! I mean the club was super packed, so I did dance, close to, next to, in front of several girls with a lot of touching. But then that touching was happening with everyone cuz the club was so packed. I wasn't really sure if they wanted to dance with me as they were in groups and were better dancers than me. Also fear of rejection was at an all time high last night. So I just lingered close without actually dancing with them.

I roll solo to clubs quite often so I can relate with you on this point. I've become so used to hitting the dance floor alone, not knowing a single soul in the club, that how to act in this situation has become almost second nature to me. I understand the fear of rejection, but as it has been reiterated thousands of times on this forum and in the manosphere it is completely irrational and you must work on your inner game to rid yourself of this feeling.

It really just boils down to awareness. Are you going to let the fear of rejection paralyze you out there on the floor and make you look like a loser dancing by yourself for long periods of time, while eyeballing chicks and not taking any sort of action? To me that feeling is 100x worse than being rejected, no matter how brutal a particular rejection might be.
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#3

Clubs VS Other Venues

OP, here's a really good resource on dance game for you to read: Dance Floor Game

I'll go through and respond to some of the comments you made in your original post.

Quote:Quote:

You either need to be a very good dancer or super jacked to get a girl's attention without talking to her.

Somewhat true, to an extent. But the only way any guy, muscled or not, good-looking or average, will ever get a girl's attention is by having the guts to approach her. An example: I was at one of the local nightclubs in my town last week and saw these two super-jacked, objectively good-looking guys there - guys that you would figure girls would throw themselves at. Well, throughout the night I kept noticing them, and they constantly looked stiff and awkward-like, just watching the girls dance and not actually going up and trying to start anything. Believe me when I say this - not being able to approach is a deficit that no amount of muscles or good looks or dance skills will be able to overcome.

Quote:Quote:

lso I'm a bit confused as to how you approach a girl on the dance floor? Do you ask her if she would like to dance when it's so hard for her to hear you, or do you just signal with your body movements

I'd refer back to Samseau's Dance Floor Game thread, but there are some quick pointers I can give you. Try not to approach-grind her from behind without you knowing she's there - it can work sometimes, but I guarantee you that's what every other chode is doing in the club. Best is to approach from the side. Don't ask her politely if she'd like to dance - that betrays a lack of confidence. Just approach, take her hand smoothly, and try and spin her. If she's open to dancing with you, she'll spin for you. Then just keep going.

Another good way I've found for approaching in a nightclub where the music's too loud is singing song lyrics. It's dead simple - once a song comes on that you know the lyrics to, tap her on the shoulder/arm and try to get her to sing the lyrics with you. It's a good mix of playful confidence, plus she know's exactly what you're saying even though she can't hear you.

She'll smile, you'll sing together for a while, and then you'll open her with a normal talking opener. If it's too loud, suggest finding a different place to sit down so it's easier to hear each other. This also allows you to isolate from any friends.

Quote:Quote:

Do you guys prefer venues where you can have a conversation like bars, lounges etc or do you think loud clubs are better for gaming?

I prefer nightclubs, but only because they tend to max out further on two key considerations: Talent + Volume. You need both in order for a venue to be good for gaming.

There are plenty of quieter areas within nightclubs that you can do talking approaches at - stairwell, smoking sections, bar rails, etc. Lots of possibilities.

HSLD

HSLD
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#4

Clubs VS Other Venues

Fuck man that was informative. Especially the dance thread. But I'm still confused if night clubs are the best place to pick up girls to fuck. I was Skyping with a friend in Singapore today and he has been getting a lot of success with Tinder. Meanwhile, I just moved to Germany and not sure how to best succeed with girls here. I'm living in a college town and a lot of hot young chicks here. Probably gonna try multiple strategies and see what works. Was also considering getting the paid version of Tinder. It costs nothing compared to how much I spend at clubs and bars...
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#5

Clubs VS Other Venues

Where exactly in Germany are you? I just got back from four months in Hamburg. I can definitely offer some tips and my experiences with German chicks.

HSLD

HSLD
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#6

Clubs VS Other Venues

In a small town called Mainz. It's about 30 mins drive from Frankfurt. And yes I would be really grateful for any advice you can offer me based on your experience with German chicks. How was Hamburg?
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#7

Clubs VS Other Venues

Quote: (03-22-2015 08:08 PM)gluukaka Wrote:  

In a small town called Mainz. It's about 30 mins drive from Frankfurt. And yes I would be really grateful for any advice you can offer me based on your experience with German chicks. How was Hamburg?

You can read my Hamburg Chronicles thread for the blow-by-blow account of my time there: Link

My experience will likely be very different from what yours will be, since the culture is very different from one area of Germany to the other. But, for a short summation of my experiences:

- The bouncers did not like me at all. I was consistently refused entry at almost any type of venue (save one specific one) if I was rolling solo.

- Gaming German girls is ... weird. They can be pretty cold and rational, and it's pretty hard to flirt with them since they don't have much of a concept of what flirting is. I've heard it said on the forum that it's like trying to flirt with an insurance adjuster. That being said, like I mentioned earlier it differs wildly by location. Southern Germany, and Berlin in particular, are better in that regard than the North.

- I don't know if you daygame or not, but if you do you should seriously consider going direct over indirect. My experience daygaming in Hamburg was that going with an indirect approach was an instant friend-zone, only since she had no meta-cognition of the fact that me asking if she'd like to have drinks together was an expression of romantic interest. I can't count the number of times when chicks would give me their numbers only for me to learn later that they had boyfriends.

- Social circle rules all in Germany. Do not go to any random nightclub or bar and expect to see groups mingling together. These social circles are tight and they are very, very hard to break into. If you are going to be staying there long-term, seriously invest some time into building a social circle or getting into one that gives you a shot at laying some girls.

- ONS is a rarity here, again mostly due to the tight social circles. (Berlin is a huge exception to this rule.)

- I emphatically recommend you visit Berlin. Many of the dynamics that I've mentioned above are attenuated by the demographics of the city (most of the people there are originally from elsewhere in Germany, thus breaking a lot of the tight social circles that are often obstacles to gaming the chicks) plus its unique culture (very alternative, left-wing, almost anarchist-like). I only spent a couple days there and had far more fun than most of my nights in Hamburg. Plus it's an easy stepping stone to the comparative pussy paradise of Poland, and Eastern Europe in general.

- Online game was a wash for me. I wouldn't bother getting Tinder Plus unless you're already killing it with Tinder in the States.

Hoping the above helps. Looking forward to hearing your stories about Germany.

HSLD

HSLD
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#8

Clubs VS Other Venues

Thanks a lot HighSpeed_LowDrag. As my third week in Germany starts, I'm already starting to realize a lot of the things you mentioned. I think I'll hop over to Poland one weekend to try some game there. Will also try other places in Europe that are better than Germany, like Scandinavia (even though I've been there before, but without the intention of gaming). It's funny how close these countries are, but how different the cultures and people are. For example, I think Dutch girls are much more friendly than their German counterparts...Any ways, I'll update on this thread as I proceed gaming German chicks. The thing is, I work 60 hours during the week, and then party my ass of during the weekends. My boss himself is a (wanna be) player. He is 40, has a girl friend, and will hit on 20 year old college chicks when we go to bars...[Image: tard.gif]. He often asks me how I'm doing with women and every time we talk about a human being of the female gender, he has to ask this question: "Is she pretty?". I'm like for fuck's sake you have a girl friend! Let's just hope I get my German flag very soon.

Also I completely agree with your point. German girls will give you their number even though they have boyfriends. They will even go for coffee and drinks with you but it's so hard to have a ONS with them.

But do let me know if you come to Europe. Maybe we can game together and hit some venues. It will be an honor to roll with someone whose reputation is as high as yours!
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