[sp180]

Edit: changed subject title

I tried looking for this on the forum and google, but could not find it.

TL;DR summary at the bottom.

With the intention of seeking insight from others:

Have any of you ever bumped into former girlfriends, lovers, or chicks you generally had sex with but stopped doing so for whatever reason, found them still attracted to you (through IOI's or just plain overtly) and taken it as a sign of you having increased sexual value during the interim? I am not speaking about the often talked about epiphany phase (she didn't want me before, now she's hit the wall, she's looking for a beta provider, she now wants me) kind of situation, but rather a recent intimacy, like 3 months or at most 2 years past.

Context for example:

I have a couple of social circles with whom my ex-girlfriend is still involved with, so I run into her from time to time. We ended things more or less amicably, but whenever I run into her she shit tests me non-stop. I could be misinterpreting these shit tests, of course, but her trying to be all cutesy specifically with me in between these shit tests was exactly how she acted during our relationship. It's not just cold, like you would expect from an ex-lover, but instead hot and cold, which my gut tells me suggests interest mixed with resentment.

I should also add, for further context, that our relationship went from:

1) Friends ->
2) I suggested and we entered an open-relationship and she agreed ->
3) I reluctantly entered committed relationship with her after she flew off the handle when I fooled around with another chick blatantly and she couldn't handle it anymore (unaware of frame at the time, lost frame, very beta, I know...) ->
4) I ended committed relationship because I was tired of her shit altogether (she's still hot and young, just too many shit tests, which I understand now were a result of having given up the frame). Also, wanted to bang other chicks in general without cheating or hiding my intentions while doing so. And I am


TL;DR - Do you think recent, former lovers' signs of increased attraction towards you, over short periods of time, are good, bad, or 'not at all' indicators of whether you've become more attractive sexually over the time that has passed?

[456]

Heh, I thought this thread was going to be about looking back at your ex-lovers to see how they got progressively more attractive as time went on... meaning first lovers looking aight, next few years of lovers being fairly cute, next few years progressing to having gorgeous girlfriends and flings.

Like a childhood friend's older brother once told us when we were 16, "as time goes on you'll get hotter and hotter women -- don't worry!"

[sp180]

(11-18-2014 06:14 PM)456 Wrote:  

Heh, I thought this thread was going to be about looking back at your ex-lovers to see how they got progressively more attractive as time went on... meaning first lovers looking aight, next few years of lovers being fairly cute, next few years progressing to having gorgeous girlfriends and flings.

Like a childhood friend's older brother once told us when we were 16, "as time goes on you'll get hotter and hotter women -- don't worry!"

I think that is generally true, especially when you improve your physique and/or overall status. It would tie in with Rollo's SMV chart.

[Hardy Daytona]

I had an encounter with an ex fairly recently.
Broke up with her about 2 years ago, before I discovered the manosphere and took the Red Pill.
Since then I've been improving myself as best I can - lifting, reading, gaming.
When she saw me I could tell she wanted a piece. And I wasn't even on form or planning to approach that evening.

So I'd say yes. If you see your ex's with any degree of regularity over a protracted period of time, you can gauge their relative interest to see if your SMV has increased since you were together.

[sp180]

(11-19-2014 01:15 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

I had an encounter with an ex fairly recently.
Broke up with her about 2 years ago, before I discovered the manosphere and took the Red Pill.
Since then I've been improving myself as best I can - lifting, reading, gaming.
When she saw me I could tell she wanted a piece. And I wasn't even on form or planning to approach that evening.

So I'd say yes. If you see your ex's with any degree of regularity over a protracted period of time, you can gauge their relative interest to see if your SMV has increased since you were together.

I want to make clear that I believe the number and quality of notches you get from different women would be a more definitive measurement of your value, but I also think there is possible insight to be gained through an ex's positive 'reassessment' (assuming her value has changed negligibly from where you two last left off). In a sense, they could be like a control group in testing out whether you have improved in an area or not.