[Irenicus]

Relevant video for this topic:

[CJ_W]

(09-08-2016 04:39 PM)CameraXL Wrote:  

I'd like to reanimate this thread, since I'm confused about a specific situation at work.

First of all: I'm no friend of gaming girls at work (although my job offers great talent). Tried twice, got burned twice. There is a german saying "Aller guten Dinge sind drei." - All good things come in threes.

First of all Since youre not going to listen to advice on the forum, just go for it and see what happens, youve already experienced this twice and got burned twice yet you want to do it again because of a stupid saying.

ok.

Go through with it, come back with your results.

You are the type of person that needs to learn through repeated experience. what you quoted there was all that I needed to know to realize that you weren`t serious about taking the forums` advice.

You asked: `what would you do`?

I would have a)declined the coffee after work. The End.

If I were your boss, and I saw that this was you, I would fire you immediately, no discussion needed. I would just call you into your office, mentioned that you broke rule A of the contract(where it says not to have outside relationships with your female co-workers) have you pack up your belongings that day, and have the person that is replacing you sitting in my office waiting for you to leave (I would have already held interviews and hired him at this point) I would have your replacement in the office as I fired you just so the new person replacing you knows what happens if you break that rule, and will remember it if he cops feelings for a girl at work.

If you dont care about yourself and your career and your physical well-being enough to NOT dip your pen into company Ink, then you obviously dont care about anything else about your company, and are a huge risk to the company.


But yeah, go ahead, go and try office romance for the third time, do it till they fire you. if they dont fire you, then date the whole office, get it out of your system, no need to stop at three tries.

[CameraXL]

You should have read what I posted after I met her. It was strictly business. No danger. No need to rant.

[jcrew247]

(09-08-2016 04:39 PM)CameraXL Wrote:  

About me:
41, 6'4, 200 lbs, good shape, lifting, media-job, southern Germany.

Here's the problem:
Half a year ago, I was moved to another department where I met this girl.
We're producing a show together. She's the host, 25 yrs old, slim but feminine, very tall maybe 5'9, dressed sexy. In an LTR, they live together. I'd rate her 8-9.

Since we started working on this project, I kept it strictly business. I'm a pro and skilled at my job, the show is a success.

After a month in the new department, she asks me whether I'd like to have coffee after work. I say "no problem." I think: "We're coworkers." And I keep it business.

You seem like an attractive dude, are you dating a lot of other girls? Play the jealousy card and see if she gets possessive over you - talk about girls that you are dating and get her advice on what you should do. If she says they are all wrong for you and you deserve better, then maybe she wants you all to herself. But I'm kinda stumped why your not dating more at your media job unless there are specific rules against it. It sounds like there are a lot of hot wannabe-actresses.

She's young and she's ambitious and trying to improve her career. A lot of these young girls seek older co-workers as platonic mentors who can give them advice on getting ahead in their jobs. She may really enjoy you as a platonic friend. Also, you said that she was already in a Long-Term relationship - so I don't really know why you would think it was a date. Unless she is having problems with her boyfriend and is looking to replace him with someone else.

Just build up the platonic friendship, and make her desire you first. That way you won't get fired unless she makes the first move. She sounds too young for marriage - maybe she just wants some casual hookups esp if she is working away from home and traveling a lot.

[Sensei Creation]

My 2 cents : It really doesn't matter to me how hot she is or how badly she's throwing it at me.

Law 5 : "So much depends on reputation, guard it with your life"

No girl is worth me risking my reputation in the office over.

Be strategic and save it for your daygame/night game sessions.

[gameking7]

I work in a mostly male dominated field in finance. I see it all the time that guys are gushing over the girls in our work. It is most definitely a scarcity mindset as one of the previous posters mentioned.

IMO its not a good idea. A guy that was on my team was in a relationship that everyone knows about. I just think it would be terrible having so many people ask you about it and then if a break up comes it would be so awkward having people know your situation.

Best to stay away unless you don't care about the job.

[TheMaleBrain]

I'm against gaming coworkers.
Almost 100% of my relationships failed. Usually when we are done you don't want the girl in your life (that's why you broke up with her, and even if she initiated - there is just no point).
Imagine having to see her day after day.
And if it was a bad breakup (it happens) - then what?

Also - the risk of "fake sexual harassment" is out there. She can also say (afterwards) that you create a "hostile work environment".

There are plenty of girls out there.

[CameraXL]

Thank you for your replies. You're right!

[XXL]

It depends on what it means to "game" coworkers and how it manifests itself