[Hardy Daytona]

I ran into an ex at the weekend and my focus has been lacking since. Emotional equilibrium upset and all that.

To elaborate, she was my first girlfriend. We dated for just over a year and I ended the relationship because I wasn't satisfied. Specifically she was unwilling to commit, citing her mother as an interference or using her as a way to avoid commitment and keep her options open.
Also there was a lack of intimacy that I couldn't break through.
There were a few personality quirks too.

This all happened before I discovered the manosphere and the Red Pill.

To cut a long story short, I ran into her at a convention over the weekend at which she expressed a desire for reconciliation.
Fortunately I was able to maintain frame the most part during the interaction - playful and humorous with a few backhanded insults and non-interest.

She claimed to have not been too successful since my departure but I know this to not be true as she has an abundance of male attention and has since been dating.

I say this not as a boast but to illustrate: I'm very good at reading people and could tell that she was being sincere when she said that she'd missed me.
Obviously she didn't say why. Possibly because the cock carousel's been slowing down or because there's something about me she wants to exploit - at the time I was unconditional in my support and very naive in my beliefs. She may want me to supplement her wavering confidence or just lavish with attention.

On the other hand, it's possible that she was wholly genuine and couldn't be with me in the way I wanted at the time because of circumstances beyond her control.
Even as I type the words I realize how ridiculous it sounds but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the possibility, no matter how remote.

On my front, my game hasn't yielded much success lately. So from an abundance perspective it certainly wouldn't hurt to have the option available.

I'm thinking it would be prudent to arrange a meeting, lay down the law and give her a time limit to comply. Otherwise next and move on. It was bad enough last time around and I've no intention of getting emotionally attached again.

I'm just not sure what the logical course of action is.

[kaotic]

(10-28-2014 12:02 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

I ran into an ex at the weekend and my focus has been lacking since. Emotional equilibrium upset and all that.

To elaborate, she was my first girlfriend. We dated for just over a year and I ended the relationship because I wasn't satisfied. Specifically she was unwilling to commit, citing her mother as an interference or using her as a way to avoid commitment and keep her options open.
Also there was a lack of intimacy that I couldn't break through.
There were a few personality quirks too.

She was riding other dicks while drying her pussy up for you, giving you the run around.

Quote:

She claimed to have not been too successful since my departure but I know this to not be true as she has an abundance of male attention and has since been dating.

Bullshit Reason #1

Quote:

I say this not as a boast but to illustrate: I'm very good at reading people and could tell that she was being sincere when she said that she'd missed me.

But she has an abundance of male attention and dating right ?

Quote:

Obviously she didn't say why. Possibly because the cock carousel's been slowing down or because there's something about me she wants to exploit - at the time I was unconditional in my support and very naive in my beliefs. She may want me to supplement her wavering confidence or just lavish with attention.

I think you know your answer just with this. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT.

Quote:

On the other hand, it's possible that she was wholly genuine and couldn't be with me in the way I wanted at the time because of circumstances beyond her control.
Even as I type the words I realize how ridiculous it sounds but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the possibility, no matter how remote.

You already know in your gut it's ridiculous, you really can't hold onto that one piece of hope that is a needle in a haystack.

Quote:

On my front, my game hasn't yielded much success lately. So from an abundance perspective it certainly wouldn't hurt to have the option available.

Just because you haven't had success does NOT mean you should think about going back to your ex !

Quote:

I'm thinking it would be prudent to arrange a meeting, lay down the law and give her a time limit to comply. Otherwise next and move on. It was bad enough last time around and I've no intention of getting emotionally attached again.

You've already invested time writing about her on a forum to us, you've also said that you acknowledge the possibility something might be there.

Quote:

I'm just not sure what the logical course of action is.

"She's seeking validation.

I wouldn't waste my time at all with her.

Keep it moving with better women, why go back to the vomit like a dog? "

Want to know why I know ? I did the SAME thing you did with an ex that came into my work (my last big love of my life).

Read this thread: Fucking an EX oppurtunity

Come back with anymore questions or thoughts.

I promise you, nothing good will come of going back to your ex, no matter how much you loved her or lusted after her.

You do realize there are WAY better women out there. She's realizing she's getting older, so she's falling back on her ex(s).

[vinman]

(10-28-2014 12:29 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(10-28-2014 12:02 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

I ran into an ex at the weekend and my focus has been lacking since. Emotional equilibrium upset and all that.

To elaborate, she was my first girlfriend. We dated for just over a year and I ended the relationship because I wasn't satisfied. Specifically she was unwilling to commit, citing her mother as an interference or using her as a way to avoid commitment and keep her options open.
Also there was a lack of intimacy that I couldn't break through.
There were a few personality quirks too.

She was riding other dicks while drying her pussy up for you, giving you the run around.

Quote:

She claimed to have not been too successful since my departure but I know this to not be true as she has an abundance of male attention and has since been dating.

Bullshit Reason #1

Quote:

I say this not as a boast but to illustrate: I'm very good at reading people and could tell that she was being sincere when she said that she'd missed me.

But she has an abundance of male attention and dating right ?

Quote:

Obviously she didn't say why. Possibly because the cock carousel's been slowing down or because there's something about me she wants to exploit - at the time I was unconditional in my support and very naive in my beliefs. She may want me to supplement her wavering confidence or just lavish with attention.

I think you know your answer just with this. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT.

Quote:

On the other hand, it's possible that she was wholly genuine and couldn't be with me in the way I wanted at the time because of circumstances beyond her control.
Even as I type the words I realize how ridiculous it sounds but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the possibility, no matter how remote.

You already know in your gut it's ridiculous, you really can't hold onto that one piece of hope that is a needle in a haystack.

Quote:

On my front, my game hasn't yielded much success lately. So from an abundance perspective it certainly wouldn't hurt to have the option available.

Just because you haven't had success does NOT mean you should think about going back to your ex !

Quote:

I'm thinking it would be prudent to arrange a meeting, lay down the law and give her a time limit to comply. Otherwise next and move on. It was bad enough last time around and I've no intention of getting emotionally attached again.

You've already invested time writing about her on a forum to us, you've also said that you acknowledge the possibility something might be there.

Quote:

I'm just not sure what the logical course of action is.

"She's seeking validation.

I wouldn't waste my time at all with her.

Keep it moving with better women, why go back to the vomit like a dog? "

Want to know why I know ? I did the SAME thing you did with an ex that came into my work (my last big love of my life).

Read this thread: Fucking an EX oppurtunity

Come back with anymore questions or thoughts.

I promise you, nothing good will come of going back to your ex, no matter how much you loved her or lusted after her.

You do realize there are WAY better women out there. She's realizing she's getting older, so she's falling back on her ex(s).

Nailed it!

[Frank Rook]

(10-28-2014 12:29 PM)kaotic Wrote:  

(10-28-2014 12:02 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

I ran into an ex at the weekend and my focus has been lacking since. Emotional equilibrium upset and all that.

To elaborate, she was my first girlfriend. We dated for just over a year and I ended the relationship because I wasn't satisfied. Specifically she was unwilling to commit, citing her mother as an interference or using her as a way to avoid commitment and keep her options open.
Also there was a lack of intimacy that I couldn't break through.
There were a few personality quirks too.

She was riding other dicks while drying her pussy up for you, giving you the run around.

Quote:

She claimed to have not been too successful since my departure but I know this to not be true as she has an abundance of male attention and has since been dating.

Bullshit Reason #1

Quote:

I say this not as a boast but to illustrate: I'm very good at reading people and could tell that she was being sincere when she said that she'd missed me.

But she has an abundance of male attention and dating right ?

Quote:

Obviously she didn't say why. Possibly because the cock carousel's been slowing down or because there's something about me she wants to exploit - at the time I was unconditional in my support and very naive in my beliefs. She may want me to supplement her wavering confidence or just lavish with attention.

I think you know your answer just with this. ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT.

Quote:

On the other hand, it's possible that she was wholly genuine and couldn't be with me in the way I wanted at the time because of circumstances beyond her control.
Even as I type the words I realize how ridiculous it sounds but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the possibility, no matter how remote.

You already know in your gut it's ridiculous, you really can't hold onto that one piece of hope that is a needle in a haystack.

Quote:

On my front, my game hasn't yielded much success lately. So from an abundance perspective it certainly wouldn't hurt to have the option available.

Just because you haven't had success does NOT mean you should think about going back to your ex !

Quote:

I'm thinking it would be prudent to arrange a meeting, lay down the law and give her a time limit to comply. Otherwise next and move on. It was bad enough last time around and I've no intention of getting emotionally attached again.

You've already invested time writing about her on a forum to us, you've also said that you acknowledge the possibility something might be there.

Quote:

I'm just not sure what the logical course of action is.

"She's seeking validation.

I wouldn't waste my time at all with her.

Keep it moving with better women, why go back to the vomit like a dog? "

Want to know why I know ? I did the SAME thing you did with an ex that came into my work (my last big love of my life).

Read this thread: Fucking an EX oppurtunity

Come back with anymore questions or thoughts.

I promise you, nothing good will come of going back to your ex, no matter how much you loved her or lusted after her.

You do realize there are WAY better women out there. She's realizing she's getting older, so she's falling back on her ex(s).

That's a great analytical breakdown. Case study worthy for all newbies.

[YossariansRight]

An ex is an ex for a reason. Move along.

[RUIN]

Exactly - if you are truly looking for closure which is what I am getting from your post, use your newfound RedPill knowledge to get her worked up, get the tingles happening then bang her in all sorts of sideways. at that point dump her like a sack of shit and move on. this isn't about revenge more getting your own back but do not I repeat DO NOT forget that the past is the past, and your ex is the past. analytical breakdown was pure gold.

[lycosidae]

The problem here is the very idea that your "emotional equilibrium" is upset because of some chick you dated.

Learn how to be more aloof and in control of you emotions and this will help your game overall...

I agree with everyone else that said don't bang an ex. Banging an abusive ex is like an alcoholic falling off the wagon.

Opportunities are for sex are everywhere, you can let one go...

(10-28-2014 12:02 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

I ran into an ex at the weekend and my focus has been lacking since. Emotional equilibrium upset and all that.

To elaborate, she was my first girlfriend. We dated for just over a year and I ended the relationship because I wasn't satisfied. Specifically she was unwilling to commit, citing her mother as an interference or using her as a way to avoid commitment and keep her options open.
Also there was a lack of intimacy that I couldn't break through.
There were a few personality quirks too.

This all happened before I discovered the manosphere and the Red Pill.

To cut a long story short, I ran into her at a convention over the weekend at which she expressed a desire for reconciliation.
Fortunately I was able to maintain frame the most part during the interaction - playful and humorous with a few backhanded insults and non-interest.

She claimed to have not been too successful since my departure but I know this to not be true as she has an abundance of male attention and has since been dating.

I say this not as a boast but to illustrate: I'm very good at reading people and could tell that she was being sincere when she said that she'd missed me.
Obviously she didn't say why. Possibly because the cock carousel's been slowing down or because there's something about me she wants to exploit - at the time I was unconditional in my support and very naive in my beliefs. She may want me to supplement her wavering confidence or just lavish with attention.

On the other hand, it's possible that she was wholly genuine and couldn't be with me in the way I wanted at the time because of circumstances beyond her control.
Even as I type the words I realize how ridiculous it sounds but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge the possibility, no matter how remote.

On my front, my game hasn't yielded much success lately. So from an abundance perspective it certainly wouldn't hurt to have the option available.

I'm thinking it would be prudent to arrange a meeting, lay down the law and give her a time limit to comply. Otherwise next and move on. It was bad enough last time around and I've no intention of getting emotionally attached again.

I'm just not sure what the logical course of action is.

[Americas]

I don't understand the whole "how to bang your ex thing."

Why the hell would I care about getting into the sack with a ex-girlfriend I have fucked 1000 times already?

I mean with the same effort (hell, probably a lot less) you could just go bang some slut from a bar for a night for the same reward.

[RUIN]

(10-30-2014 05:45 PM)Americas Wrote:  

I don't understand the whole "how to bang your ex thing."

Why the hell would I care about getting into the sack with a ex-girlfriend I have fucked 1000 times already?

I mean with the same effort (hell, probably a lot less) you could just go bang some slut from a bar for a night for the same reward.

why do we do anything? don't know about you but for me "because I can" is a good enough reason.

also while some people are happy to move on the OP sounds a tad hung-up, and truth be told I have gotten the same way when it comes to either a girl I used to date or never got to bang.

[Hardy Daytona]

Some harsh truth in there. But it's what I needed to hear.

Whenever my oneitis starts flaring up it always comes back to her. She was the first girl I ever said the three words to so it stands to reason.
However, I know for a fact this leopard doesn't change it's spots.
She just wanted to lure me back after I dropped DHV bait.

So, I need a decisive plan of attack.

Firstly I need to get a copy of Bang and read it cover to cover because my game has been really poor the last couple of weeks.
Secondly I need to continue gaming as best I can.
Thirdly when I run into her again (I usually do every few months) I have to maintain the frame I established and go for the bang and nothing more.

Thanks for the advice.

[kaotic]

(11-03-2014 12:16 PM)Hardy Daytona Wrote:  

Some harsh truth in there. But it's what I needed to hear.

Whenever my oneitis starts flaring up it always comes back to her. She was the first girl I ever said the three words to so it stands to reason.
However, I know for a fact this leopard doesn't change it's spots.
She just wanted to lure me back after I dropped DHV bait.

That's your issue, you need to have an abundance mentality, not a scarce one. Start gaming and banging more, you'll forget about this girl.

Hey, I've said ILY a few times, then just stopped saying it in general. You cannot let that cripple you and be hung up on that. Part of me thinks you're a bit blinded by good pussy, but you see the red flags and corrected yourself.

Quote:

Thirdly when I run into her again (I usually do every few months) I have to maintain the frame I established and go for the bang and nothing more.

I think you need to step away from her for awhile man, if you see her, play it cool and calm, then keep carrying on. I have a feeling your oneitis will come back hard banging her again.

You need to move onto other girls.

Get the books, read up in the forum, there is a TON of great knowledge, advice, tactics, plays, etc.