[The Lizard of Oz]

@Cunnilinguist, I gave Mech as an example of the opposite. Does he sound to you like a guy who is "always positive"? Gio is to some extent but Gio is one of a kind.

It's not about "good news" or "bad news" but about whether there is any life and relish in the writing or whether it's just some species of dressed-up rhetoric, the literary equivalent of empty calories. It's easy for readers to be (temporarily) suckered in by rhetoric and not realize that there's not much behind it -- only the psychology of a man who is not particularly into life.

Even this sentence:

(07-09-2014 02:14 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

@Oz And oh, since you want some good news I am also meeting the Russian lingerie model tonight

sounds almost magically flat and empty. There is no relish in it.

[Nomad77]

Well Oz, why don't you write us some feel good stuff with some "relish" in it? I wouldn't mind reading some of it myself. Show me how to do it or point me to a thread of yours as an example of how it should be done.

[The Lizard of Oz]

Sure.

http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-29245.html

This is a thread I wrote a while ago about drinking. It's not what anyone would call a "happy" or "feel good" thread, it's a thread about how hard drinking leads to depression and rapid aging.

But when I did drink I loved and relished it, and this can be felt in every word. This is why guys who read it were hit hard by it -- those to whom it's relevant and for whom it was written.

[Nomad77]

I am sorry Oz but while it is well written it's sort of depressing. I didn't find much to relish about it and it didn't make me happy reading about someone's drinking problem. But maybe that's because I don't drink. How about this post, does it have any relish: http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-36901-...#pid770069

[General Stalin]

This OP had a great point until this spiraled into a pissing match about how people write.

Once you become an errand boy who does a woman's chores for her, she will dry up because you are supplicant. Woman want a man who does what he wants when he wants, not a co-dependent who aims to please. This is blue-pill thought process 101. Unaware men are lead to believe a way to a woman's heart is molding your world around hers, taking care of her needs and desires, and providing any and all support that you can. While a woman will enjoy this, it will certainly not give you the desired effect. She will see you as weak and codependent (which you are).

[Nomad77]

Thanks for getting the thread back on track General. Well stated!

[The Lizard of Oz]

(07-09-2014 03:03 PM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

How about this post, does it have any relish: http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-36901-...#pid770069

Yeah it has the very minor relish of lightly trolling us with tales of magically "confident women" with "short hair".

[arribaperro]

Related thread from 5/20 - 5/22. "Beta orbiter gets put into friend zone after saving girl's life."
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-36285.html

[kaotic]

Why does it seem every thread that Nomad's post get hijacked or criticized ? I thought we're all about positivity and helping each other up, not bringing one another down.

[Nomad77]

Thanks Kaotic but I understand that I go against the general beliefs of a large segment of the forum plus my writing style is somewhat arrogant. The way I look at it is that if every one of my threads don't have a least one hater then I am doing something wrong

[JayRock604]

Wow, eye opening thread. Golden shit nomad I just lost all momentum/attraction with my Fbuddy recently, couldn't exactly pinpoint where I went wrong, but I guarantee this is why. Instead of just having her over to get drunk and bang, then get the funk out, she was complaining about something I did lots of research on. I dont want to get into too much detail as it makes me cringe but I ended up helping her the way I would a best buddy, I don't know why I did that. After that last bang, never got it in with her again .
Looking back I completely broke frame by doing this anyways, I was no longer fun, aloof party guy, but rather helpful provider beta or something. O well, lesson learned, right? Just a shame because I'm fairly novice to game so I'll probably dip into a dryspell now. Game on I guess just something else to add to the game journal.
Cheers dudes

[Nomad77]

As they say: no good deed goes unpunished by women

[BadWolf]

Quote:

Do you like to see your sex kitten washing dishes? No, you want to be able to maintain that fun, sexy image of her ...

I think doing the dishes IS sexy. When my girl is pushing around the broom, massaging my back or cooking me dinner while I play the 360, I like that.

Nomad: I think this pertains to a certain kind of lady.. the sex kitten is usually some damaged daddy's girl who sees weakness in relationships and stability. I had a girl like this once and on the very first night she said "Don't say you care about me, it turns me off!". Can you imagine, this girl left me because she eventually thought I was boring and a loser when I suggested we get married (after 3 years). With my asian girl, I do the exact same stuff but I get hugs and kisses at the end of the night in return. With the 'sex kumdumpstten' I was always sleeping with one eye open, always paying attention to my game, checking every rule of the PUAs, employing little tactics like walking away, not calling too often... stupid sh1t like that... it was absolutely exhausting and in the end I lost her anyway.

The girl I'm currently with, I have never used game... its not necessary and actually would be quite cruel. The one time I stepped on a subway train without her, she banged on the window when it closed and panicked... when I came back, she was in tears because I didn't bring my cell phone and we almost lost each other. Who felt like a dick? This guy. Of course my wife is not a 'sex kitten' but the trade offs are stability and low maintenance.

All the advice you will ever need is found in Jimmy Soul's Song: If you want to be happy.

http://v.youku.com/v_show/id_XMTUzNTYxMTU2.html

[Nomad77]

Good luck finding one of those in America!

[nek]

(07-09-2014 11:22 AM)samsamsam Wrote:  

The funny thing is the people who seek compassion/mercy rarely give it to others.

I've noticed this about alot of women. Have no regard for someone's feelings only to be hypersensitive and in need of constant therapy sessions with friends. I think this should be added to the 'red flags' list. But I wonder, why is this? Just Narcissism?

[Nomad77]

Never help someone unless they are willing to ask for it. Otherwise, they will resent you for helping them.

[BadWolf]

Yep for sure or they'll be REALLY REALLY paranoid and suspicious as to why you want to help them. I think certain people just have 'helper' personalities. I'm one of those people also, I will go out of my way to help perfect strangers, sometimes it results in friendships, other times the people tell me to FOFF. As far as fighting goes, if you followed my concussion thread at all, you absolutely DO NOT WANT one of these, they are very painful, sometimes permanent and can take weeks or months to heal. It's not to your benefit to stick your neck out for someone you don't know who ISN'T as Nomad said, calling out for help. I got this during an accident but I'm pretty sure you could pick one up easy by getting in the middle of two pissed off guys.

Now if a guy is screaming HELP ME! PLEASE MAKE HIM STOP! CALL THE POLICE!!!... well that's entirely different.

I would like to know how often those 'REAL' superheroes that walk around at night in shitty costumes, get their asses handed to them, probably alot.

[Byron]

Are women really this broken?

[Byron]

You're telling me that even after you're in a sexual relationship, you'll lose chicks because you help them with something small? Out of a genuine desire to help and nothing more???

[Byron]

I feel like this cannot be true or there's a major caveat here.

How do men get married? How do men have fiancés? How do men have girlfriends? At some point each of those men must have played Mr. Fixit or posed as an armchair psychologist once or twice.

Or are you suggesting that none of those guys are having sex with their women. I might be incel but I sure as hell know that other dudes, in some cases more "beta" than me, are getting laid. After all, the growth rate isn't negative.

Dr. Love talked about girls that will try to get guys to do chores for them (including armchair therapy) before a sexual relationship. That was a no-no in his eyes; after she proved to be a worthy mate he said you could soften up after.

Have none of you ever helped a casual dating partner/long term partner and seen her interest in you RISE or at least remain the same?

[General Stalin]

(07-10-2014 07:42 AM)Byron Wrote:  

I feel like this cannot be true or there's a major caveat here.

How do men get married? How do men have fiancés? How do men have girlfriends? At some point each of those men must have played Mr. Fixit or posed as an armchair psychologist once or twice.

Or are you suggesting that none of those guys are having sex with their women. I might be incel but I sure as hell know that other dudes, in some cases more "beta" than me, are getting laid. After all, the growth rate isn't negative.

Dr. Love talked about girls that will try to get guys to do chores for them (including armchair therapy) before a sexual relationship. That was a no-no in his eyes; after she proved to be a worthy mate he said you could soften up after.

Have none of you ever helped a casual dating partner/long term partner and seen her interest in you RISE or at least remain the same?

Byron,

This is not as black and white as you are making it seem, but we are talking about the averages here - majority rule. Of course, if you are in a long-term relationship with a woman then it goes without saying you are going to be helping her out here and there with something, but it's the frequency, degree, and behavior surrounding these deeds that determines a woman's interpretation of you.

The West is not what it was 60 years ago. Women are not dependent on men. They are not taught to find a good man, start a family, and settle down as soon as you become an adult. They are taught to be independent, wealthy, well-educated, strong, etc.

This is social conditioning. Female youth in our culture have been indoctrinated into a world view where men-as-providers are not desirable as women are expected to provide for themselves. Our historical role as providers has changed in Western civilization.

Women in our culture today do not appreciate being provided or as they once did. This doesn't mean they don't like being taken care of, but it means that the way they interpret it is different. Men who do things for them are convenient, but unnecessary. Convenient = low effort to get desired results. If getting a man to do what you want requires little effort then there is no incentive for you go out of your way to please him or chase him.

Relationship are all about keeping a certain level of balance. As men, we need to be on the uphill looking down in order for the relationship to work properly. Don't get my words twisted - this does not mean women are to be seen as lesser than men. What it means is that we are naturally expected to be strong and independent. Show me a relationship where the woman needs to "chase" the man and work to keep him around and keep him happy and I will show you a relationship that is working and both parties are happy. Show me a relationship where a man chases the girl and put in more effort than she does and I will show you a relationship where the woman is becoming more and more entitled and losing interest, and the man is not a leader and co-dependent.

This is America anno 2014. Women can get their own oil changed.

[Bill]

So the choice is to be a clown or a hero-provider.

[AneroidOcean]

(07-10-2014 01:38 PM)Bill Wrote:  

So the choice is to be a clown or a hero-provider.

No. Most of these guys talking about how you have to be a clown for a girl are using a lot more game and a lot less lifestyle/core improvement. That, and they're going for the one night stand/super bitch shield girls.

There's nothing wrong with a little beta/provider mixed in there. With the right amounts/right timing you make her want you even more because she can't nail down what/who you are, she just knows that she wants more.

You just have to strike the right balance and calibrate for each girl. If you go too much the beta/provider instead of just sprinkling it in, you'll either turn the girl away, or she'll want to get married.

[Demenxia]

Firstly, thank you very much for the excellent post because after a few years, I realized this is my main problem with the girls, I was trying to be a provider instead of the lover.

My question is what to say a women if she starts to see you as a provider, like telling her problems all the time etc.? How to make yourself "NOT a provider" in her eyes?

[Fighting888]

Women like men who are stoic, calm, emotionless, distant, and slightly callous.