First of all thanks everyone for chipping in and helping.
Now I'll try to answer everything
Quote: (06-19-2014 09:38 AM)lowside Wrote:
could you give us an example of your typical date?
- convo's (exact words, yours/hers)
- locations, venues
- body language
etc.
- Convos
I don't have a preplanned stories to say, I usually start the convo and let it flow.
The exception being filling the blanks with Spike's questions.
It's hard to come up with exact quotes but I've gave some throughout this post
- Locations: there is a go-to pub around 7 minutes walk from my place that I use for first date, second... have yet to figure it out.
It's a semi upper class pub, not a sports bar.
Have a nice patio (an asset in Toronto, now that we have some sun here), and usually no music or very quite music.
Usually half-full, and full on Friday eves.
-Body language
I usually sit back, relax and semi-maintain eye contact, occasionally looking at something else to avoid staring at her. Trying to communicate that I'm a bit of interested and she needs to sell it to me.
Quote: (06-19-2014 10:54 AM)kinjutsu Wrote:
Rootless you are getting the "lets be friends" reply is because you aren't being viewed as a sexual threat.
To these women you are safe.
You should be kissing the girl about mid-way through the date and repeatedly after that. To the point where at the end of the date the final kiss good night is sexualized and you grab a handful of ass when you pull her in tightly.
She'll either push you away and turn her head or melt into your body.
If she pushes you away then don't bother texting her back and move on.
Don't wait so long to contact her again. 2 days max is the limit.
I know some guys here are afraid to text a girl too early because their text game is bad.
Honestly i just copy what El Mechanico sends to girls. They eat it up.
Interesting points, both kissing midway and waiting only two days. I'll give it a shot.
Could you please link me to El Mechanico texts guideexample emplateswhatever?
Quote: (06-19-2014 11:05 AM)Benoit Wrote:
How to make it sexual? Pick a feature of hers and tell her it's sexy. The word sexy is not said to friends.
"Your eyes are really intense. It's sexy."
"You have such passion when you talk about that. It's sexy."
"I love they way you walk in those heels. Very sexy."
Don't pick an obvious sexual body part like tits or ass though, pretend you haven't noticed those until later on.
A bit relucted about this one, doesn't it come off as creepy?
Quote: (06-19-2014 02:12 PM)ThePianoMan Wrote:
Do you leave bait for date #2 during date #1? You gotta whet their appetite with the excitement and thrill of hanging out again. Leaving them thinking that you may never meet again is a dangerous seed to combat if you're serious about securing the bang.
Doesn't it comes off as too needy?
Quote: (06-19-2014 03:45 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:
Am I the only one who thinks there's something more going on here? I mean, several girls bothering with a "let's be friends" after one date? How is the conversation even being taken there? Something's fishy.
You hit it right in the head, something is fucked up here, and that's why I'm seeking advice.
It stroke me when the last girl the FZed me, we were sitting on the bar in the pub I've mention earlier. Everything went pretty smooth, we talked about the world cup at some point, and I've said "I'd rather do sports then watch them on TV, it's more a social thing in my opinion. You know, instead of drink beer and talk with my buddies we drink beer and watch the game"
To which she replied "I can see, you are fairly fit" (!).
Shit, at the end of the date, after we've kissed, she actually told me "I had a lot of fun, text me!"
Quote: (06-19-2014 03:45 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:
OP how's your breath and overall hygiene? Are you a good kisser? What are your social skills like - do people get a weird vibe from you when they don't know you very well?
Is there something else you might be doing that's throwing a wrench in this operation?
Because if you've got something weird or even just a bit awkward going on that's crushing your game, turning up the sexual escalation may not be the answer. I suppose you could try it and see though.
Hygiene - always shower and groom before going out, using Old Spice deodorant and Hugo Boss perfume. Don't think its an hygiene.
Kisser - it's a bit harder to measure, but it's not the case.
Socialweird vibe - I'm fairly social, have friends and weave it into the convos to communicate it, don't think it's that.
However, it might be my low alcohol tolerance, the limit for dates is two beers. On the third I start getting tipsy, which is counterproductive.
Maybe during the second beer I'm not as sharp and that's throwing the wrench? maybe bad game starts to bleed out?
This one is a bit harder to improve, any tips are welcomed on this one.
Also it's a bit far fetch but everything is possible, as foreigner here as I type this line, could girls think that all the dating thing is only to marry them and get a citizenship?
It's being countered by telling that I'm in the process of getting a degree to get a citizenship (which is the truth btw) during the "what do you do in life" stage which is never more then five minutes in.
Again, nothing is ruled out in this point.
@Days of Broken Arrows
Thanks a lot for this advice, maybe taking a step back would be helpful.
@WIA
During the date girls seem to be having fun.
I tend at some point I shut up and let them carry the convo, most of the time they will and come up with a new topic.
Vast majority of the time I choose when end the date, so they don't leave in the middle or anything.
A lot of girls say
"You're the worst" in a playful way, usually involved hitting my arm.
"you're really sure in yourselfoverconfidence" several times.
More useful info:
I tend to be a five to ten minutes late, usually she already sits and if it's possible I'll sit next to her.
Been thinking about arriving just on time so I could have better control over sitting arrangements.