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Creating Good Conversation
#1

Creating Good Conversation

Somewhat tangential, but this article made me think: Amazon is killing my sex life. If want to know what game is, this is it. This girl is writing an article for Salon begging to be gamed. The approaches get a ton of attention but that's only a few seconds of the interaction. Where she decides she wants to spend more time with / fuck you happens during your conversation with her.

This one is priceless
Quote:Quote:

No, I spent a half hour or more listening to him talk about his job. Since I am not in the tech industry, I don’t understand any of it. It was all job speak—the type of language ladder-climbers use; it was the kind of talk that shuts vaginas down cold.

"shuts vaginas down cold"... did Roissy ghost write this article?

Takeaways
  • She calls out guys who don't try to find out about her. Basic shit. Guys get so hung up on DHV they can overdo it. Find out about her. If she's interesting, you've got a good branching point for a conversation. If she's boring, then she'll be more impressed by your DHV, particularly if you draw her into your world: "oh, you've never been surfing? You'll have to come along with me & my buddies...". Whether or not you follow through depends on whether you like her enough. It's the promise, the fantasy that makes you compelling.
  • Talking down to her. Remember the quote about Disraeli: "He made me feel like the most intelligent woman in the world". Maybe she is stupid and her philosophy degree was a waste of daddy's money. If you can't stand her, then call her out. But it's subtle: "I constantly felt like I wasn’t seen or valued by them" is signalling something else. I doubt these guys were telling her her philosophy degree was worthless. My guess is if she mentioned it, the guys had no way to relate and changed the subject back to something they understood. It's OK to ask questions about something you know nothing about. You don't have to like it or approve of it or tell her how cool it is, just find out and get her talking. Roosh covers this: early on in the pickup you'll be doing most of the talking but the goal is to get her to open up to you.
  • She calls out dudes throwing money around. “My dating life went from dating artists and writers and going on cheap but exciting dates, to men who thought the ability to buy someone an expensive meal made them interesting.” What's the lesson? The dude who went out and spent a couple hundred bucks wasted his money if the object was to get laid.
  • Finally, the theme is uninteresting guys who talk about nothing but work. Lesson: If your only interest is work, then you'll only be interesting to the people you work with.
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#2

Creating Good Conversation

I used to think that conversation had a point, especially when talking to girls.

There is no point. It's all fluff. In fact, the fluffier and more inane and banal it is, the "better" the conversation is.
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#3

Creating Good Conversation

Avoid:
Peacocking (Subtle DHV indicators ALWAYS speak volumes more)
Shop talk
Rants about your Ex
Talking too much (Don't show your hand, leave some mystery)

Do:
Make eye contact
Listen
Ask the occasional question
Have interesting stories to tell

= Good conversation

MDP
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#4

Creating Good Conversation

Game is good. You need to know how to be confident as fuck, how to engage with eye contact, and how to listen a little bit. The push and pull is very important, and with regards to the tech guy, it was all push. You set yourself up as a high value man, yes, but then you've got to pull her into your frame and have her interested and intrigued by you without spilling your life story out on the table. Having a couple good stories memorized can do wonders for her intrigue, and can also be a demonstrator of high value.
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#5

Creating Good Conversation

Links not working on phones
Posting to check back later

That being said i do try a different approach to Dating on every date

With some shy girls you really have to do most of the talking but women heavily prefer a dark mysterious man.

valhalla
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#6

Creating Good Conversation

Dang, I could have used this article yesterday. I was on a date at a bar, and while I talked--an achievement in itself with me--it was mostly about my travels and didn't go anywhere else. At the end of the night she told me "I don't get a feeling that I want to bang you."
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#7

Creating Good Conversation

I could write a very short pamphlet on conversations.

The guys who tend to have the biggest problems with this are regular dudes with technical jobs. They also have these same problems at work.

But no one cares about you, but you.

You know what people care most about? Themselves.

Even when they talk about other people, they're talking about themselves.

Whatever the topic, the undercurrent is

"I wouldn't do that"
"I would do that"

Here is a poorly thought out 5 part sequence.

1) Keep the focus on her

Keep the conversation centered around her
- it's about her
- it's about her friends, family, co-workers
- her relationships
- her hobbies and her interests
- her opinions, ideas, and concerns about stuff outside of her personal universe

She's the expert on her. You are not. No matter how many outrage pieces you read from Jezebel, you have no idea what this chick is about.

You're trying to gather intel
a) to have that "romantic" spark
- what kind of guys has she dated
- relationship with father
b) to screen her, to see if she meets your "relationship criteria"
- job, money, religion, et cetera
- your personal pet peeves about women. "Have you ever gotten a salad, and stolen a french fry off your boyfriend's plate?"

2) If she asks about you, rarely talk about yourself
- do make a mental note, and figure out if she's being sincere or merely polite
- steer the topic back to her
- humblebrag if you must (more like subtle brag, but that's a topic for another time)
- drop bait to see if she bites
- stay mysterious, keep her guessing (the second you become a known quantity, the game is up - unless of course you're hot shit, in which case, game on)

3) To build attraction during the conversation
- tease, joke,
- break the touch barrier
- any story you tell has to be visual. Paint the picture with your words

4) purposefully break rapport by a) challenging her, b) stopping the flow of approval on everything she says.

- you're not Glen the Good Listener
- You're a challenge
- you're gauging her reactions, just like she gauges yours

5) The end goal
- she feels like she had a great conversation with you
- she feels like she knows you well
- you actually haven't said much
- you have an idea of what gets her going, romantically
- you've ruled out, or at least gotten wind of her particular brand of "eccentricity"
- you've sparked a bit of romance (which will be consummated with a some frozen yogurt or something along those Sunday School lines)

Extra credit? meaningful and emotional conversation?

- Throw in a vulnerability story and open up to her, and see if she opens up, and if she does - GREAT.
- if she doesn't, you've screened her out, not a good (long term) match

WIA
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#8

Creating Good Conversation

^^^^^ More hidden treasure from WIA. Props to RockHard for pointing it out

_______________________________________
- Does She Have The "Happy Gene" ?
-Inversion Therapy
-Let's lead by example


"Leap, and the net will appear". John Burroughs

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure."
Joseph Campbell
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#9

Creating Good Conversation

"He was a software engineer or did something in tech" - She wasn't paying enough attention to even know a proper job title for the guy. As soon as she found out he "did something in tech" her ears stopped working and she probably thought about her iphone. This begs the question why she even went on the date in the first place, since it was an "impromptu Internet meeting", she could easily have discovered his occupation.

"He was good-looking enough, but I wasn’t going to be able to get it up for a boring tech dude." - Wow, how far we have come that women feel it is acceptable to infer to their non-existent penis in a mainstream article, especially one about how bad men are. So why use such masculine language to say he didn't make you horny? It screams entitlement; that he was lucky be graced with her presence even for an hour while she got a free meal and drink. I suspect the date was very much like what Roosh describes in this post about midway through http://www.rooshv.com/patricias-smartphone

Just goes to show the poosy only opens to those with game.
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#10

Creating Good Conversation

Bump.
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#11

Creating Good Conversation

How about if the girl is on her phone during the date- checking messages.

Or... if she's back at your place, watching a movie and playing her phone.

How do I go about telling her to put the phone down without coming across too forceful or needy?
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#12

Creating Good Conversation

Quote: (11-04-2016 02:09 PM)mrganteng Wrote:  

How about if the girl is on her phone during the date- checking messages.

Or... if she's back at your place, watching a movie and playing her phone.

How do I go about telling her to put the phone down without coming across too forceful or needy?

Tease her.

"Anything good on FB?"

I personally like to put my finger on her screen and scroll up and down whatever messing up whatever she is doing. Gets the point across.
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#13

Creating Good Conversation

I'd love to see what a conversation looks like between the girls and one of the guys in the 'i just got laid' thread who bangs 150+ hot girls per year.

I wonder what they say. What they talk about. How they lead the conversation. Whether each conversation with each new girl ins very similar (maybe they always drive the conversation to certain subjects?).
Basically, I wonder how they can get laid at the click of their fingers whereas some of us have been rejected like 300 times in a row [Image: smile.gif]

We've all read the same 'game' books, but none of obviously them tell you what to say - Just really to try to be playful, tease girls, use kino etc. I do all that, but it ain't working.....yet!! [Image: smile.gif]
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#14

Creating Good Conversation

Quote: (06-04-2014 12:19 AM)Valhalla Wrote:  

Links not working on phones
Posting to check back later

That being said i do try a different approach to Dating on every date

With some shy girls you really have to do most of the talking but women heavily prefer a dark mysterious man.

I do agree. It seems many women like to take time to "figure out" a mysterious man. I think the process gives them excitement.
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#15

Creating Good Conversation

Quote: (11-04-2016 02:09 PM)mrganteng Wrote:  

How about if the girl is on her phone during the date- checking messages.

Or... if she's back at your place, watching a movie and playing her phone.

How do I go about telling her to put the phone down without coming across too forceful or needy?

Start to walk away. If you really don't care then this is just a fun way to see how she reacts. I haven't made it to the point where they let me walk away completely so tread at your own risk.

Attraction and passion are non-negotiable
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