[vicen]

Hello,

i met a cute girl -solid 8- some months ago, she has an herb boyfriend who i think she loves and is happy with but at the same time she keeps flirting with me, teasing, etc.
At this point i know I'm in the friend zone so i don't invest much time on her. I try to keep myselft as the 'cool friend' because someday she could be single again and now gives me preselection, bigger social circle, etc.

What bothers me is that she negs me often -i'm good looking enough to be negged heh- and has told me in 3 or 4 occassions stuff like:

-We could never be together
-You know.. nothing could ever happen between us
-You sould stay away from musician girls (she is)

wich i respond
-i agree, you seem the jealousy type
-yeah we would be discussing all day.. and then fix it in the bed
-yes but they keep chasing me

As i said we flirt a lot, so i wonder if this is some kind of shit test, something they throw up to me to keep her conscience clear (something like a false discualifier).. or could be a sincere rejection?

I ask you guys because, to be honest, even if she is funny and a good addition to my circle i don't want to waste my time on girls i won't have a chance to fuck.

[CJ]

Three reasons you're not wasting your time:

1. She probably has cute friends you can bang.
2. This is good practice, IMO your responses to her "negs" are all good.
3. Sounds to me like she's moderately interested, but I could be way off as I don't have much to base this observation on.

If she's not annoying you, or hindering your pick-up, and as you said you don't spend that much time with her, why get rid of her entirely?

[hydrogonian]

ummm.... she's basically extending an invitation to make a move on her. Women don't say things like that to guys that they aren't interested in. She's creating some fairly heavy sexual tension.

Now, she may reject you if you do make a move, using her boyfriend as an excuse. It sounds like she may be smiling out of one side of her mouth while rejecting you with the other. But be a little persistent (in a socially normal way). This sounds like the type of girl that would be flattered at the attempt anyway, and may possibly succumb to it, even if she is initially playing some game that serves to just boost her ego.

[lottery]

She wants to fuck you..if one day you are alone with her, touch her hair, then look into her eyes and start kissing her. Just try that shit, nothing to lose.

[AlphaQup2nite]

Nothing to lose seems like the best rule of thumb in pickup. It really is the best piece of advice anyone anywhere has given me. If you want to kiss her, kiss her, if she rejects, either game more and try again, or move on. You want to bang her, go for broke. Chances are even if you strike out there are no lasting consequences. Maybe youll be down for a bit, but its not like there is a network of women who share exactly what you do with each other. We could never be together is just another female cop out for "im interested but conflicted," which seems to be a constant state of mind for women no matter what. All the game theories are pretty much finesse, you gotta start with talking to girls and the confidence to attempt the game before anything else. A competent tennis plays is still good enough to play with compared to a world class player, and the difference is all in the details, the finesse. Very rare is the chick gonna throw you on your back and mount you or start sucking your dick without you talking to her in some form or another. You cant win if you dont play, so dont go half assed about it, just like everything in life.

And face it, woman dont like to say no. No one does. Putting her on the spot gives her less time to rationalize her way out of going with what she wants. Let her save the rationalization for after the fact, that is something they are good at. Why dont you win arguments with women in long term relationships? b/c they can use any convoluted train of logic to justify anything, so have them put it to work justifying why she would sleep with you if she doesn't want to be a slut after you sleep with her, rather then let her think of reasons as to why she shouldn't sleep with you in the first place.

Though in the finesse part of your post, you should have been the one making such comments she has already made. That way she is the one who needs to step it up to be with you. Its like magic; once its in the air, if you bring it up, she is the one working to prove you wrong, rather then you working to prove her wrong. Woman dont like things handed to them, but are addicted to things that just seem out of reach. As hydro posted, she is creating the tention and forcing you to respond, not the other way around as it should be.

Honestly the only time i write a chick off as lost is when she starts bringing up other hot guys, singer movie stars etc... Tho im not sure this makes as good of a blanket rule as i thought it did 6 months ago.

[vicen]

Thanks for the answers.

We have some common friends and i know she has never cheated on her bf.
Anyway, a couple of days ago we were alone at night in a cab on our way home and i tried to kiss her. She pulled back and said "i can't.. you know.. i have a boyfriend".
5 mins after we said goodbye she sent me a one word text. I don't know how to translate it into english, its like "dumbass!!" in a flirty way. I didn't answer.

The next two days she has written me on IM with the same flirty vibe. I finished the conversations fast.

This girl spend several hours a day on facebook chat, IM, etc.. updates frecuently her status and comments on social networks and she probably has 4 or 5 regular orbiters boosting her ego while her beta provider boyfriend suffer a terminal case of jealous. Attention whore.

The problem is that she has a type of face, personality and sexuality that i like very much. I know she likes me and I'm starting to think maybe too much about her lately.

I guess i'll have to pass and move on.

[Baldwin81]

"Anyway, a couple of days ago we were alone at night in a cab on our way home and i tried to kiss her. She pulled back and said "i can't.. you know.. i have a boyfriend".
5 mins after we said goodbye she sent me a one word text. I don't know how to translate it into english, its like "dumbass!!" in a flirty way. I didn't answer."

Vicen,

When you're in that exact situation and the girl says "Oh no... I can't... I have a boyfriend."

Look directly into her eyes and say (with the slightest twinge of annoyance), "I don't care."

Before game, I've done the exact same thing as you did in the cab (as if things usually got that far along). After game, I've said the above...

Very different results.

Credit to Roissy on that one.

[Screwston]

You're her back up plan so don't waste time or money on her. She'll come to u when she wants to. If y'all are alone, try to fuck her but let her come to u.