[Sir Vigorous]

You guys are all optimist. They hide their true selves up until marriage easily. I'd say about 5 years otherwise. There are two points to consider.


1. They are quite adept and trained at conniving and deceitful behavior. We are used to being direct and are easily fooled.

2. They change upon marriage. Think of if like this: When you first meet a girl and you're talking to her you are legitimately interested in her on some level. You will then show that interest through all sorts of subconscious cues. However, once you bang her your interest level suddenly plummets and thus you are acting differently. You weren't "faking" interest before, it's just now the interest is gone. You've changed towards her.

With women once they get their goal of marriage their objectives change. They now will try to break you down to be what they want you to be. They want to make you fit into their home like every other piece of furniture.

You may know a women's true self after about a year, but know that's not how their going to be when the nature of the relationship changes. (Forget marriage, simply upgrading from casual to relationship can engender a major change)

[void]

They don't deceive till marriage, its just when you are married, you have zero aces up the sleeve left.

[Akula]

(05-14-2014 09:49 AM)void Wrote:  

They don't deceive till marriage, its just when you are married, you have zero aces up the sleeve left.

So don't get married (and don't co-habitate). Marriage is a horrible deal for men in the Anglosphere - common law marriage can be almost as bad from what I've heard.

Unfortunately I think that many women can hide their 'true selves' for years.

Moreover, people change, women even more so after they have a kid or start living with a man. The literally can become different people what with post-partum depression & all their various afflictions & mood swings as they age - not to mention menopause (not that you'll be around then anyway!))

All that said, you should have a decent sense about them after 6 months to a year. During this time you should be testing them and observing their behavior patters in a very clinical way. Easier said that done of course. But I try to challenge myself now to really observe them and learn their habits and ways of doing things in order to better judge them. Of course, none of them have passed the tests to date!

Re being "in love" as one poster said, meh, you'll never ever have that feeling you do during the first few times throughout your 'relationship'. As you get older I'd say the 'honeymoon' period lasts way less...for me it's like weeks if not a few months now.

[kinjutsu]

Get the girl drunk/high...

Get them right sauced and then ask them questions. Let them think you're drunk/high then pepper her with questions.

Then reason for doing so is two-fold. You'll see how she recalls certain situations when she was acting wild and having a good time.
Also you can put her in situations drunk/high and see how see interacts with other people mainly guys.

The majority of cheating will come in the form of her being under the influence of drugs or alcohol and her being in an environment that encourages socialization (house parties, night clubs, pubs)

I assume most women will falter at being loyal at some point.
Depending on how much other value she brings to the table will determine whether or not keep her around for fucking or slowly fade away.

I also pay attention to how she lies to her friends/family because that's exactly how she will lie to you.

[Daddy]

Well for me it goes quite fast. Once you know who her friends are, who her family is, and you spend enough time with her, you learn everything you need to know. You will know fast if she's the kind of girl who takes a shit with the bathroom door open.

I don't think women try to hide who they are. They will try to hide that they're hoes or ex whores stuff like that, but for the rest they are open books.

[Duke Castile]

There's a series of books by Terry Goodkind. The First one is Wizards First Rule. The rule is something along the lines of "People will believe something either because they want to, or they are afraid something is true".

WIA was the first to point it out. You know her nature a lot sooner than 6 months, you just might choose to overlook things or convince yourself something was an uncommon event.

The best way to get good at seeing the real her is to know thyself first.

Having an unshakeable philosophy that stands up to logical conclusions is a big part of that.