[Arabian Lover]

I am going to put up 2 excerpts.

One describing the nice guy and the other describing the bad boy. then I am going to put another excerpt of a woman explaining how she fell in love with a nice guy that happened to be a narcissist.

ok here is the 1st one:

"When you meet a really attractive woman you become unduly obsessed with her, convincing yourself that she’s “the one” when you don’t even know her yet. This intense focus of attention will only make her realize that you’re superficial (you don’t even know the real her yet) and that you’re really creepy.

The “bad boy” allows her to convince him of her worth, thereby helping her to feel she’s “earned” his attention and affection, and she will ultimately find him more rewarding to be around."

OK now here is the 2nd one:

"The person begins the relationship by saying that they know that you are the "one." This can commonly feel way too good to be true and happen far too fast. Remember when Mom told you that anything that seems to good to be true really is? She was right. At the same time though, they will mention, setting you up for the next cycle of mean, that they are unsure. That way, they can flip it all around and accuse you of what they did. Remember, it's all about power for these sickos.

They might also say that you are "the best." They might buy flowers and shower you with gifts. This is to make you think that they are the best. You will be naturally drawn to them and feel cozy and loved. You might reciprocate and tell them that they are as well. Try stopping suddenly and watch how they react. If they get mad and tell you that a compliment should be reciprocated, just ignore them and leave. Take note though. Many will actually show signs on the face of deceit. In case you are not able to note those signs, here is some help. They will have a smirk on their face as they build you up. They might even slip and laugh as they say it. All of that is a sign of deceit. They are literally laughing at your stupidity. They are already getting a charge from making you feel like an idiot while they gain power.

They are too close too quickly. These people will always call too much and too often. You might notice that you have so much contact from them that you can't get your work done. They also keep you up late at night. When you say that you need to sleep, they tell you that you are an abuser for demanding sleep. This is part of another cycle that comes after the brainwashing. That cycle is about destroying your community of friends and your reputation. Again, this is all for power. When someone is dominating your life, put the emergency brake in place. Get out before it's too late."

The narcissistic behaviour sounds exactly like the kind of thing that "nice guys" do. and yet they don't get pussy. How come?

How come bad boys who act nice to get a woman's attention and nice guys who use the same techniques differ in pussy rating? how come nice guys get less?

Maybe the title of this thread should be "Are Nice Guys Closet Narcissists"

[Arabian Lover]

I forgot to add. do narcissist attract a certain type of woman? or is it women attracted to these in general?

[Saweeep]

I don't think I've ever met someone truly narcissistic who is not what it says on the tin:

Self obsessed, arrogant, selfish, manipulative and full of one's own self importance.

A great personality trait for mastery of game imho.

I don't really see much narcissism in your posts tbh OP.

[soup]

A lot of modern women have this fantasy that everybody is a person before they are a gender. From this perspective, all men and women are seen as just agents or individuals or groups. Imagine an androgynous world.

Let's say that everyone looks the same. All things equal. If someone started latching on to you without really getting to know you, you'd probably get the sense that something was off. Perhaps they lack confidence and are latching on to you because they are afraid that they won't find someone else.

Now let's introduce attractiveness in the equation. Let's say you are mediocre looking. It might seem even more probable that this person is immediately latching on to you out of some insecurity or lack of options if you have not yet displayed any other value than how you look.

Here's the nice guys' problem and how they should handle it:

While most guys fantasize about having a super attractive mate, a lot of normal guys just want a companion that they can come home to after work. She doesn't have to super hot, just enough, and loyal above all else.

But, we live in a culture that tells women that they are not only special little snowflakes, but are also entitled to be praised like princesses just for existing and having a pussy, regardless of how attractive they are.

So instead of just telling a girl "look, I'm a really busy guy and you seem like someone who'd be nice to come home to after work, let's give it a shot", a lot of guys feel compelled to a drop a ridiculous amount of praise on these women they see as a potential mate.

The ladies were probably put on a pedestal by their fathers, and now these guys maybe feel that have to take on that father roll and display unconditional love for these over-appreciated girls.

Put all of the above together and you have a perfect storm of shit for both sides.

Unfortunately, it doesn't look like attitudes are going to change anytime soon.

My sense is that in the past, guys only really needed game to get with the most attractive girls. The plain janes where ok with you just being normal and having a decent job to support them and some kids.

Now you need to have game just in order to get the attention of the mediocre girls.

I think that's why have a lot of guys on here lamenting having to be a "clown". They want to return to the old dynamic so they can just focus on there life mission external to mating.

The old days are over and aren't coming back.

Guys now have to get their game together to land a mate. That's it.

[WestIndianArchie]

(05-09-2014 10:04 PM)Arabian Lover Wrote:  

How come bad boys who act nice to get a woman's attention and nice guys who use the same techniques differ in pussy rating? how come nice guys get less?

Maybe the title of this thread should be "Are Nice Guys Closet Narcissists"

Bad Boys tend to have additional qualities.
Nice guys don't have those qualities.

But the real problem here is thinking that Flowers and Chocolate game/Compliment and Cuddle is the driver of attraction.

That analysis is very simple minded and doesn't reflect the reality of picking up chicks.

A player could pull a chick to his car and have a bunch of roses, and tell his date that the flowers are NOT for her. Even though that's why he bought them in the first place.

He'll just let the chick's hamster do a couple of marathons in her wheel as she tries to figure out what message he's trying to send.

The player will bring some chocolates to a chick because he wants to distract her, or he wants to watch her eat the chocolate and makes her take it slow and do it seductively.

That's the difference between a nice guy, a bad boy, and a player.

The nice guy is trying to please the chick. It works sometimes, even on hot chicks.

The bad boy is just trying to please himself. This works more often, especially on hot chicks.

The player is actively engaging a chick's mind in the way that he wants to.
She can interpret his actions however.
The next man can look at what he does and make a judgment
Society can view his moves and make its call.

The player is focused on what he's doing.

All three of them can get laid though. It's a mistake to think that's there's one true way. Indeed, it might be most prudent to learn and employ what is needed as the situation changes.

Maybe you pull a chick in bad boy mode, play the good guy in front of her parents and friends, and during the course of the relationship, you start to focus your attention on modifying her behavior. At no point can anyone pin you down. After a while, you're not even playing a role, it's not artificial - you're just being yourself.

WIA