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Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers
#1

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

I saw this "documentary" pushed on HBO recently.

[Image: logo.png]

PuffingtonHost has a write up on the show.

Some comments on the article:

Quote:Quote:

I guess its all sunshine and roses for the 26% of single-parent households where the parent is the father. Oh wait..

Wait for it...

Quote:Quote:

Ah yes, the poor men who are ostracised and shamed for not keeping their legs together and choosing to have children out of wedlock. The poor men being told to get sterilized because they obviously don't have the capacity to make decisions for themselves and the foresight to 'just know' things could go very wrong in life. The poor men being denied their birth control left, right, and center.

Please. There's no doubt some single fathers have a hard time but it in no way compares to the way that single mothers are put through the wringer in society's eyes. We won't even get into the wage gap issues.

This documentary is about single mothers. If you want a documentary done about single fathers, feel free to contact HBO and ask them to film one for you.

His response stomps the bitch out, despite the vaguely feminist rhetoric.

Quote:Quote:

First, thanks for automatically discounting the majority of single fathers and what we deal with. "Some" single fathers have a hard time? SINGLE PARENTING IS HARD NO MATTER WHAT GENDER YOU ARE. I realize its hard to comprehend something outside of your rather small, sheltered worldview - but I assure you, single men have their own set of very challenging issues to deal with. Discounting such truths is doing a profound disservice to the entire movement of protecting single parents.

You obviously don't have a clue about the stuff single dads have to deal with. The clucking tongues, looks of disapproval from other men AND women, ("What? can't find someone to help you?" "You're not wired to be a 'mom' - you need help!", "This isn't a man's role - you're wrecking your daughters..", "You'll lose them when they become teens - you won't understand what they're dealing with"....) the expectations at work to never - ever - take off, and yet doing so when your kid needs you to which causes rather pronounced "work performance" issues on one's annual review.

I could go on and on and on, but its going to be lost on you because only "SOME" men have a rough go of it. Nobody said that women didn't have it rough. I never said that one sex has it easier over another - YOU did. Remove your head from the dark area you're keeping it and expand your worldview - this is a gender-ambiguous problem.

[Image: paycheck-to-paycheck.jpg]

I don't have to watch the "documentary" to see the forest for the trees. This about ratcheting up social support for single mothers.

I fully believe that this is exactly what the system wants from women: single motherhood. All this persecution talk is simply nonsense -- especially when they think it comes from government, modern Christianity or media. Paternalism has passed from "father knows best" to "the State knows best" or expert in the media knows whats best for you.

Unyoking men and women and bringing them into direct conflict does wonders for the state and corporations. While all this gender nonsense was done with "good" -- but ignorant -- intentions, the system has sat by, profiting from it. Without men around, the system knows women are more than vulnerable than they have ever been.

Of course, it isn't poor single mothers rioting in the streets, it is middle-class white women who are getting pissed off at the fact that poor mothers are "being discriminated against." Sure, they are not rioting the streets, but they are angry at society. Apparently, after all this state intervention in people's private lives, it hasn't resulted in the utopia they were promised. Instead of stepping back and realizing that state intervention displaces personal autonomy and causes mass insecurity and shame, they just double down on what they have been told will save them.

And they do it by turning on HBO. Come on, poor people don't get HBO. HBO knows it's "socially conscious" demo is desperate to think that they have the inside track on how society oppresses people: namely white women. There need be no facts presented in this "documentary," as the targeted audience will believe next to anything about how bad this class of women have it.

Not convinced? Check these comments:

Quote:Quote:

Part of the problem is the no fault divorce laws and the unwillingness to hold fathers accountable for supporting their children, especially if the mother works. If the mother is on welfare, they will make more of an effort to get fathers to pay, but not much of one. Society has adopted a "leave dear old dad alone, he's moved on and made more children, get over it" mentality. So society doesn't hold fathers accountable either. But boy when dear old dad wants custody, they all think mom should hand over the kids, any time under any circumstances. Another big problem is the acceptance of CHOOSING to be a single parent, even when they have no job or cannot afford to do so. Too many people are opting to have children with every other person they have more than a one time date with. And these are not "accidental" pregnancies. These are choices. There are many ways to avoid pregnancy and yet somehow there ends up being all these "oops" pregnancies, multiple times? Don't think so. Time to start making both parents financially accountable for the offspring they produce and stop giving them an "oh well" shrug and passing it on to the taxpayers.

Four stars.

Here is a response:

Quote:Quote:

While I didn't watch and don't know why the dad isn't around, you are absolutely right. My favorite thing is when men father a s-ton of kids who are a few weeks/months apart and don't pay a dime for any of them. When there is absolutely no more money in our govt for aid, maybe then people will get the picture. Until then, it's party till you drop.

OP gets her ignorance on:

Quote:Quote:

The thing that gets me is that when dad has custody and is supposed to get CS, they are much quicker to go after a mother who doesn't pay, much quicker to penalize her and much more harsh with the criticism if she doesn't step up. Fathers still get free passes when it comes to obligations and expectations for kids. Then they demand to be equal in custody, CS arrangements in court even when they did not participate in the daily care of the kid when they were with the mother and even if they don't plan to do the daily care after. They intend to pass it on to someone else and think the courts should just hand the kid over because they are the "man". Until men's expectations and society's expectations for fathers are equal, why should the fathers expect to be considered equal in custody awards? If you didn't take care of your kid when you lived with them, why should you get the primary custody?

Previous responder agrees and makes an interesting point:

Quote:Quote:

It is possible that men petition for custody just to make things difficult (and a higher attorney bill) for the mother. They also use the kids as bargaining chips and leverage to get other things they really want. I totally agree, I don't get the fathers fighting for custody and CS. It is laughable almost all of the time.

[Image: Rottenecards_538933_m83sdnt9mt.png]

Why is it laughable? These two women are coming from the posture that men -- as a class -- are deadbeats, not be trusted and probably closeted rapists.

I have no idea where the concept that society gives "deadbeat" fathers a pass, but it gets absolutely absurd that these women are assuming that fathers withhold money to punish women. Sounds vaguely classist, as they assume they would only let a man with means fuck them. Further, this seems the likely assumption, as they assume that men with a "s-ton" of kids is skipping out of payments. Are these women sleeping with dudes that make 20 bucks-an-hour instead of their 9.50 an-hour? Women's fantasy men always money in the bank that innately belongs to women, for whatever reason.

Also, the assumption that men use family court as a way to act out personal animus towards the other party is nothing but projection. I have no doubt that some men do that, but the whole concept reeks of female behavior.

Being on HBO, this is clearly marketed towards SWPL's and the like. It is no more than an ideological piece aimed at convincing SWPL's how bad women have it in society, most especially poor women. The point is to secure social approval and -- hopefully -- from the political standpoint - to garner more $$$ to pay off single mothers.

In my life -- and this is somewhat reflected in the comments -- I saw poverty. I was not impoverished, but my family was close. What I see in the more landed classes is the complete ignorance of what it is to be poor.

I experienced this in law school, as innumerable feminists and left-wingers with Lex's and BMW's in the parking lot would fiercely contradict what I would assert, claiming privilege explained by opinions. Apparently, they didn't scrape by to pay for my shitty hatchback in the parking lot, but I need to check my privilege before I critically reflect on my past.

Many comments dispute "Fox News talking points" that women get intentionally pregnant to collect benefits. They are wrong. Many women -- growing up on the government dime and little child support -- see this as the appropriate approach to life. If they vote, they vote Democrat. All they know is popping out a couple kids with sexually attractive bad boys and depending on meager child support and government help.

Middle-class dipshits that flood the comments at HuffPo don't understand class at all. As a conservative, all I really consider is class concerns, but liberals have too much invested in everything but class to truly consider class. They don't understand that a life of government checks + low wage jobs = guarantee nothing more than poverty is fine. These women don't give two shits about climbing some corporate ladder. The fact that free money comes in twice a month is candy to a baby.

[Image: Sheryl.Sandberg-crop.jpg?1376354405]

Women emulate other women. When single mothers give birth to babies, they create new single mothers and disengaged fathers. When you learn that women don't need men to raise children, you see what happens. When you learn that you aren't relevant to raising children, you see what happens.

Narcissism has many dimensions, but what we see here is the gap between the poor and those who might be rich. The poor get their superiority complex sated by free checks from the government, "Gee, I'm so important I get money I didn't earn!" For everybody else, those women get the distant -- but impossible -- goal of being Sheryl Sandberg. Even as Sheryl, a woman will still be the subject of powerful males. Women only want the trappings of power, not actual power. Men will always run women ragged at the highest echelons of power.

All this being said, this "documentary" is nothing but an individual woman seeking the light of the camera and a vague appeal for a greater lifestyle. She greatly enjoys the spotlight and isn't worried about junior's college fund, but a swankier pad to raise Thing #1 and Thing #2. Sounds like there might be a Think #3, but what does she care?

I would imagine that she tries to highlight the inequities of modern society with respects to women who leave their husbands. However, it sounds like a whole bunch of rotten shit about a woman who is so weak, she needs to constantly re-invent herself.

Quote:Old Chinese Man Wrote:  
why you wonder how many man another man bang? why you care who bang who mr high school drama man
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#2

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

A large fraction of single mothers are single because they were dumb enough to abandon their children's father(s) and push him/them out of the children's lives. That's child abuse and millions of single mothers are guilty of it.

A man who gets a woman pregnant and decides he doesn't want to be a father so he leaves is no more of a deadbeat than a woman who gets pregnant and decides she doesn't want to be a mother so she gets an abortion. At least the former doesn't end anyone's life.

I've got the dick so I make the rules.
-Project Pat
Reply
#3

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

Quote: (03-16-2014 03:40 AM)2Wycked Wrote:  

I saw this "documentary" pushed on HBO recently.

[Image: logo.png]

PuffingtonHost has a write up on the show.

Some comments on the article:

Quote:Quote:

I guess its all sunshine and roses for the 26% of single-parent households where the parent is the father. Oh wait..

Wait for it...

Quote:Quote:

Ah yes, the poor men who are ostracised and shamed for not keeping their legs together and choosing to have children out of wedlock. The poor men being told to get sterilized because they obviously don't have the capacity to make decisions for themselves and the foresight to 'just know' things could go very wrong in life. The poor men being denied their birth control left, right, and center.

Please. There's no doubt some single fathers have a hard time but it in no way compares to the way that single mothers are put through the wringer in society's eyes. We won't even get into the wage gap issues.

This documentary is about single mothers. If you want a documentary done about single fathers, feel free to contact HBO and ask them to film one for you.

His response stomps the bitch out, despite the vaguely feminist rhetoric.

Quote:Quote:

First, thanks for automatically discounting the majority of single fathers and what we deal with. "Some" single fathers have a hard time? SINGLE PARENTING IS HARD NO MATTER WHAT GENDER YOU ARE. I realize its hard to comprehend something outside of your rather small, sheltered worldview - but I assure you, single men have their own set of very challenging issues to deal with. Discounting such truths is doing a profound disservice to the entire movement of protecting single parents.

You obviously don't have a clue about the stuff single dads have to deal with. The clucking tongues, looks of disapproval from other men AND women, ("What? can't find someone to help you?" "You're not wired to be a 'mom' - you need help!", "This isn't a man's role - you're wrecking your daughters..", "You'll lose them when they become teens - you won't understand what they're dealing with"....) the expectations at work to never - ever - take off, and yet doing so when your kid needs you to which causes rather pronounced "work performance" issues on one's annual review.

I could go on and on and on, but its going to be lost on you because only "SOME" men have a rough go of it. Nobody said that women didn't have it rough. I never said that one sex has it easier over another - YOU did. Remove your head from the dark area you're keeping it and expand your worldview - this is a gender-ambiguous problem.

[Image: paycheck-to-paycheck.jpg]

I don't have to watch the "documentary" to see the forest for the trees. This about ratcheting up social support for single mothers.

I fully believe that this is exactly what the system wants from women: single motherhood. All this persecution talk is simply nonsense -- especially when they think it comes from government, modern Christianity or media. Paternalism has passed from "father knows best" to "the State knows best" or expert in the media knows whats best for you.

Unyoking men and women and bringing them into direct conflict does wonders for the state and corporations. While all this gender nonsense was done with "good" -- but ignorant -- intentions, the system has sat by, profiting from it. Without men around, the system knows women are more than vulnerable than they have ever been.

Of course, it isn't poor single mothers rioting in the streets, it is middle-class white women who are getting pissed off at the fact that poor mothers are "being discriminated against." Sure, they are not rioting the streets, but they are angry at society. Apparently, after all this state intervention in people's private lives, it hasn't resulted in the utopia they were promised. Instead of stepping back and realizing that state intervention displaces personal autonomy and causes mass insecurity and shame, they just double down on what they have been told will save them.

And they do it by turning on HBO. Come on, poor people don't get HBO. HBO knows it's "socially conscious" demo is desperate to think that they have the inside track on how society oppresses people: namely white women. There need be no facts presented in this "documentary," as the targeted audience will believe next to anything about how bad this class of women have it.

Not convinced? Check these comments:

Quote:Quote:

Part of the problem is the no fault divorce laws and the unwillingness to hold fathers accountable for supporting their children, especially if the mother works. If the mother is on welfare, they will make more of an effort to get fathers to pay, but not much of one. Society has adopted a "leave dear old dad alone, he's moved on and made more children, get over it" mentality. So society doesn't hold fathers accountable either. But boy when dear old dad wants custody, they all think mom should hand over the kids, any time under any circumstances. Another big problem is the acceptance of CHOOSING to be a single parent, even when they have no job or cannot afford to do so. Too many people are opting to have children with every other person they have more than a one time date with. And these are not "accidental" pregnancies. These are choices. There are many ways to avoid pregnancy and yet somehow there ends up being all these "oops" pregnancies, multiple times? Don't think so. Time to start making both parents financially accountable for the offspring they produce and stop giving them an "oh well" shrug and passing it on to the taxpayers.

Four stars.

Here is a response:

Quote:Quote:

While I didn't watch and don't know why the dad isn't around, you are absolutely right. My favorite thing is when men father a s-ton of kids who are a few weeks/months apart and don't pay a dime for any of them. When there is absolutely no more money in our govt for aid, maybe then people will get the picture. Until then, it's party till you drop.

OP gets her ignorance on:

Quote:Quote:

The thing that gets me is that when dad has custody and is supposed to get CS, they are much quicker to go after a mother who doesn't pay, much quicker to penalize her and much more harsh with the criticism if she doesn't step up. Fathers still get free passes when it comes to obligations and expectations for kids. Then they demand to be equal in custody, CS arrangements in court even when they did not participate in the daily care of the kid when they were with the mother and even if they don't plan to do the daily care after. They intend to pass it on to someone else and think the courts should just hand the kid over because they are the "man". Until men's expectations and society's expectations for fathers are equal, why should the fathers expect to be considered equal in custody awards? If you didn't take care of your kid when you lived with them, why should you get the primary custody?

Previous responder agrees and makes an interesting point:

Quote:Quote:

It is possible that men petition for custody just to make things difficult (and a higher attorney bill) for the mother. They also use the kids as bargaining chips and leverage to get other things they really want. I totally agree, I don't get the fathers fighting for custody and CS. It is laughable almost all of the time.

[Image: Rottenecards_538933_m83sdnt9mt.png]

Why is it laughable? These two women are coming from the posture that men -- as a class -- are deadbeats, not be trusted and probably closeted rapists.

I have no idea where the concept that society gives "deadbeat" fathers a pass, but it gets absolutely absurd that these women are assuming that fathers withhold money to punish women. Sounds vaguely classist, as they assume they would only let a man with means fuck them. Further, this seems the likely assumption, as they assume that men with a "s-ton" of kids is skipping out of payments. Are these women sleeping with dudes that make 20 bucks-an-hour instead of their 9.50 an-hour? Women's fantasy men always money in the bank that innately belongs to women, for whatever reason.

Also, the assumption that men use family court as a way to act out personal animus towards the other party is nothing but projection. I have no doubt that some men do that, but the whole concept reeks of female behavior.

Being on HBO, this is clearly marketed towards SWPL's and the like. It is no more than an ideological piece aimed at convincing SWPL's how bad women have it in society, most especially poor women. The point is to secure social approval and -- hopefully -- from the political standpoint - to garner more $$$ to pay off single mothers.

In my life -- and this is somewhat reflected in the comments -- I saw poverty. I was not impoverished, but my family was close. What I see in the more landed classes is the complete ignorance of what it is to be poor.

I experienced this in law school, as innumerable feminists and left-wingers with Lex's and BMW's in the parking lot would fiercely contradict what I would assert, claiming privilege explained by opinions. Apparently, they didn't scrape by to pay for my shitty hatchback in the parking lot, but I need to check my privilege before I critically reflect on my past.

Many comments dispute "Fox News talking points" that women get intentionally pregnant to collect benefits. They are wrong. Many women -- growing up on the government dime and little child support -- see this as the appropriate approach to life. If they vote, they vote Democrat. All they know is popping out a couple kids with sexually attractive bad boys and depending on meager child support and government help.

Middle-class dipshits that flood the comments at HuffPo don't understand class at all. As a conservative, all I really consider is class concerns, but liberals have too much invested in everything but class to truly consider class. They don't understand that a life of government checks + low wage jobs = guarantee nothing more than poverty is fine. These women don't give two shits about climbing some corporate ladder. The fact that free money comes in twice a month is candy to a baby.

[Image: Sheryl.Sandberg-crop.jpg?1376354405]

Women emulate other women. When single mothers give birth to babies, they create new single mothers and disengaged fathers. When you learn that women don't need men to raise children, you see what happens. When you learn that you aren't relevant to raising children, you see what happens.

Narcissism has many dimensions, but what we see here is the gap between the poor and those who might be rich. The poor get their superiority complex sated by free checks from the government, "Gee, I'm so important I get money I didn't earn!" For everybody else, those women get the distant -- but impossible -- goal of being Sheryl Sandberg. Even as Sheryl, a woman will still be the subject of powerful males. Women only want the trappings of power, not actual power. Men will always run women ragged at the highest echelons of power.

All this being said, this "documentary" is nothing but an individual woman seeking the light of the camera and a vague appeal for a greater lifestyle. She greatly enjoys the spotlight and isn't worried about junior's college fund, but a swankier pad to raise Thing #1 and Thing #2. Sounds like there might be a Think #3, but what does she care?

I would imagine that she tries to highlight the inequities of modern society with respects to women who leave their husbands. However, it sounds like a whole bunch of rotten shit about a woman who is so weak, she needs to constantly re-invent herself.

I chuckle at the father not being held repsonible comment . No child supporf equal more child support plus interest . As a bonus , enjoy a luxury vacation in jail . The male equivalent of these struggling single mothers are in raggedy clothes treating the corner liquor store like a 9 to 5 . Their job consist of begging for drink , " bus fare , food , " fighting over drunk things , and more drinks . While the mom living on paycheck in Section 8 housing due to over spending on material things , the men are sleeping somewhere ... . More single mothers creating the same product works everytime and why not . Nowadays , a single mother can get the new IPhone ( dead serious ) and baby materials . Her envious friends see the benefits and proceed as well . Meanwhile the state would rather let the kids go to the grandmother if the mom don ' t want them , but the dad do .
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#4

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

There was a time when being a single mother was a akin to a scarlett letter. These days it's a badge of honor. I even saw a poster for a movie called "The Single Mother's Club" or some shit like that, glamorizing Single Mothers as "doing it all" which is another way of saying they are being the "all", which is a reference to being "The One" a.k.a God.

More modern day women, like the one I knocked up, don't even want a husband. They just want the kid and the money for themselves and our court system incentiveizes this.

Sad times in America.
Reply
#5

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

"Any woman who thinks a man is unnecessary in raising her child is unfit to be a mother."

This is my own personal shit test to women.
Reply
#6

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

Fuck them. Being a single mother is a choice. Unfortunately these days they're showered with sympathy instead of shame.

Team Nachos
Reply
#7

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

[Image: Paris_Tuileries_Garden_Facepalm_statue.jpg]

I am so sick and tired of hearing about single mothers. Whatever...

Deus vult!
Reply
#8

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

The term 'single mother' is such an insult to genuine widows and widowers. The ones I know are divorcees, with state mandated babysitters (Dad) that pay the single mom to watch their kids so they can go out and get laid. That hardly seems like a harrowing experience to me.

Why do the heathen rage and the people imagine a vain thing? Psalm 2:1 KJV
Reply
#9

Paycheck To Paycheck: HBO On The Poverty Of Single Mothers

This show is mis-named.

It should be entitled: "Child Support Check to WIC voucher to EBT Account Disbursement to Section 8 Entitlement: HBO on the Poverty of Single Mothers"
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