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First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take
#1

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

A couple of nights ago I went out for the first time with this girl who I've been flirting with for a while now (workplace social circle, she knows other girls I've dated within that circle). It was a quick setup -- a day's notice -- and it was open as far as time and place was concerned. I just told her we're going out after work "tomorrow". When the next day came, she attempted to give me shit twice -- she tried to downgrade it to lunch instead, which I said no to, then an hour before we both get off work she tried to press me for an actual venue then suggested we go to a pricey "dinner-date" place nearby for a quick chat and commented that my plan to "just walk up the street and hit a few places that suits the mood of the moment" was a "drawn out process". It took her three consecutive long text messages to explain all that hamster-ish shit, to which I replied with "nevermind". She replied "fineee. it is 6 then" and the date pushed through.

A bit of walk led us to this meh Japanese place. I made her pay the tab there and then we bounced to a pub for some drinks where I took care of the tab. I was up to my usual sexualized banter but it felt like the mood was overly friendly. Kino wasn't much help there because she's very used to me touching her all the time (although I know I should've upped that to new heights during that night). She expressed some disappointment over not being able to make me open up more while she was there telling me lots of things personal about her. She kept asking me about my n count, for example, but all she ever got was "what does your gut tell you? trust your instincts, it's always right" (she said 17 is in her head, but she doesn't know why).

I called her out twice for minding her phone while we were talking. Towards the end of the night, the mood has become too friendly that she felt okay to ring two of our friends (1 gay guy + 1 semi-player) who happen to be nearby to come join us at the pub which they did.

Me and this girl got to spend like 4 hours together before the 2 guys showed up and after they showed up another 2 hours as a group (it was fun hanging out with the 2 guys but it totally killed my vibe). We ended up walking home together but by this time I wasn't feeling it anymore. I told her point-blank that this night was disappointing and didn't even bothered to walk her to her door. It was like getting turned off and your mind completely veers away from the thought of sex after that. I went to bed not even thinking of her.

The next day, she approached me at my desk at work to chit-chat and she saw a book about psychological persuasion lying on my table (I work in Marketing) and commented "are you using that on me?" I said, "take it. read it. so next time, you'll know how you'll get me" and left it at that. She walked off with that book saying "ill text you later". No contact since then (2 days running) and I don't intend to interact with her for a while.

So, what do you think boys? What's your gut feel in this situation?
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#2

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

I can't offer much in the form of advice, but man that first paragraph was gold.

Anytime I get a long ass txt from a girl rescheduling shit I'm just gonna reply "nevermind".

I think you did a great job diffusing her shit tests, who knows maybe the door is still open.
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#3

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

Is she an 8 or 9?

If not I wouldn't expend the energy there are other 6's and 7's that can't wait to bang.

Sounds like her ego is inflated from her social group, a queen bee so to speak. A lot of these girls suck to try and bang. If you have to, it may be best to befriend her if she has LOTS of hot girlfriends to pass off. Otherwise forget it. My gut is she is difficult and the only way you will bang anytime soon is with a ton of alcohol to kill the friend vibe.

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Quote: (05-19-2016 12:01 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  
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#4

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

The only real problem I saw with your story was when you were at the bar after dinner where she wants to call 2 of your co workers to hang out with the two of you on what started off as a date. You likely didn't escalate enough but it is possible she just wasn't feeling a connection to you.

Try more venue changes and more escalating. You strike me as a smart guy who 'gets it', and when one of the guys on here gave you some solid advice to give a girl a diet ice cream bar as a birthday gift, you took it and ran with it, that is good.
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#5

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

update: she texted this afternoon (2 hours after I wrote the original post, 30 hours after our last interaction (when she walked off with my book)

"hey need to talk to you"

i replied "watup" 4 hours later. i was out with a new chick and legit busy on a Saturday weekend evening. we'll see how this goes.

the "I need to talk to you" is a classic sign. I am likely making a good job feeding her hamster.

thanks for the comments guys. I am learning to play this game better and better each passing day with your help.
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#6

First Date with A Very Sociable 23 yo With Lots of Options - Your Take

Your text game seems fine, just escalate sexually on dates, it's either on or it's not and you'll know that from trying.

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