[deathtofatties]

It's good that you didn't beat up that guy, because it's her fault that she cheated on you.

[Clyde]

You didn't attach the guy or smack her around. But I would have never taken him for a beer. For what. But still It was a good mind fuck.

[Courage Reborn]

First off, major props for keeping your cool.

Trying to understand the overall goal here. I get that you were caught off guard.

So the question is, what do you want?

If I were in this situation, my goal would be;

For the girl; Permanent exile to 2nd class fuck buddy, at best. I think the way you handled her expressed this sentiment perfectly. You were an icy mother fucker. 10/10.

For the guy; Not quite sure. Fight, extort, befriend, ignore, gather intel? Lots of options here. Can anyone else chime in with the correct answer? I can't figure it out.

[Hencredible Casanova]

OP - where do you live? Sounds like a small city to me.

Either way, not surprising though. Given she was an ONS, it's important to remember she was always a slut. Also, based on what you said about how all the other girls in the meantime that were showing you interest didn't remotely compare to her in looks, it's a given that other dudes were showing her interest as well.

Nothing to be mad at. This is a classic tale of how you can't make a ho a housewife. Lesson learned for you.

[ImmoralPsychology]

I respect the fact you didn't try to fight the guy. Not only could that lead to bad things for you legally (I doubt a jury would excuse you for assault and battery just because your girl cheated with him), but it's also illogical as shit to jump to the conclusion that he even has any idea that he's boning a taken girl. Often enough, the girl lies and the guy has no fucking idea there's even a boyfriend. And even if he does know there's a bf, he doesn't know you or the situation and doesn't owe you anything. At the end of the day, it's her choice to bang the dude and it's her that is involved with you. If the guy was a co-worker of mine or friend, then maybe it's different, but I would never go after a guy I don't know. There's no point to that and it will never end well.

As for where to go from here, I'd say don't fuck her again because the moment you do, she'll FEEL like you still like her or can't give her up or have forgiven her or whatever. She wins because she'll see it however she wants to.

You can toss her and move on.

But for maximum revenge? Make her your 'friend'. Pick up and fuck her friends. Tell her about your other girls. She'll feel much more regret about her actions when she realizes that a) you care so little, you don't want to fuck her AND you're not even made enough to tell her to fuck off and b) that other girls are having the fun with you that she could have had. If you aren't too wrapped up in her and can pull this off, this would fuck with her head bad.

[Beyond Borders]

(10-02-2013 12:03 PM)Courage Reborn Wrote:  

For the girl; Permanent exile to 2nd class fuck buddy, at best. I think the way you handled her expressed this sentiment perfectly. You were an icy mother fucker. 10/10.

I say well done but cut her loose. Not in an emotional way - just stop calling and ignore. I honestly don't get guys that continue banging a girl they caught cheating on them. It's almost like you're rewarding her for her behavior, as she obviously wanted sex from multiple guys anyways.

It's one thing to have casual sex with someone if it started out that way but if you were into her and she cheated on you, that person has wronged you in a major way. Now you're going to hang out and flirt and fuck and have fun together? Nah, not me. Cut her loose, be civil when you see her out, and don't look back.

I mean, I've banged girls that did me wrong years afterwards if I bumped into them but that was kind of different. To me, hopping back in there is almost like getting cuckolded - now she can have her cake and eat it too. And even if you tell yourself you'll keep your feelings out of it, that's a bit harder in practice if you actually did care for her before all this went down. If you play it right, it can be like torture to her never being able to get you back on an emotional level, but it can also backfire.

Nothing tells a woman she fucked up like cutting her off completely while not showing a shred of emotion. It's not a lesson she'll soon forget.

Quote:

For the guy; Not quite sure. Fight, extort, befriend, ignore, gather intel? Lots of options here. Can anyone else chime in with the correct answer? I can't figure it out.

Do nothing. What does the guy have to do with anything?

Keeping him around just for intel is putting way too much effort into a woman that fucked another guy behind your back. No reason to befriend him unless you really hit it off for some reason, which seems doubtful given the gravity of such a situation. Fighting him - why bother? It's not like he was in a relationship with you or anything...he just wanted some tail. Nothing personal.

Move on is the only answer. You and the dude were nothing to each other before and you're nothing to each other now.

[Remington]

(10-02-2013 11:31 AM)samsamsam Wrote:  

I know not totally relevant, but just curious. How big was the guy? Height and weight.

The other guy was about 6' and pretty skinny, maybe 170lbs. Not a good judge of weight.

[Remington]

(10-02-2013 11:31 AM)soup Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 11:28 AM)Remington Wrote:  

The reason why I had a beer with the guy was to make my her hamster wheel spin. It was also entertaining to see the look of bewilderment and utter fear (I'm 6'6 235lbs) on the dude's face taking him out for a beer after he was dick deep 5 minutes beforehand.

But, like Soup and Menace already said before, I probably didn't do a good job keeping her on a tight leash. Either that, or the lack of effort I put into sex.

Do you have other girls that you are also banging?

As of right now, there's only other girl I've been banging on the side so I need to go out and start making shit happen.

[Remington]

(10-02-2013 12:14 PM)Hencredible Casanova Wrote:  

OP - where do you live? Sounds like a small city to me.

Either way, not surprising though. Given she was an ONS, it's important to remember she was always a slut. Also, based on what you said about how all the other girls in the meantime that were showing you interest didn't remotely compare to her in looks, it's a given that other dudes were showing her interest as well.

Nothing to be mad at. This is a classic tale of how you can't make a ho a housewife. Lesson learned for you.

I live in a suburb about 45 minutes from DC.

[Beyond Borders]

(10-02-2013 12:42 PM)Remington Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 11:31 AM)soup Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 11:28 AM)Remington Wrote:  

The reason why I had a beer with the guy was to make my her hamster wheel spin. It was also entertaining to see the look of bewilderment and utter fear (I'm 6'6 235lbs) on the dude's face taking him out for a beer after he was dick deep 5 minutes beforehand.

But, like Soup and Menace already said before, I probably didn't do a good job keeping her on a tight leash. Either that, or the lack of effort I put into sex.

Do you have other girls that you are also banging?

As of right now, there's only other girl I've been banging on the side so I need to go out and start making shit happen.

Tonight's a new night - put on your game face!

[soup]

It's a blessing- now you can feel free to stretch out some salivating snatch.

[Hencredible Casanova]

(10-02-2013 12:45 PM)Remington Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 12:14 PM)Hencredible Casanova Wrote:  

OP - where do you live? Sounds like a small city to me.

Either way, not surprising though. Given she was an ONS, it's important to remember she was always a slut. Also, based on what you said about how all the other girls in the meantime that were showing you interest didn't remotely compare to her in looks, it's a given that other dudes were showing her interest as well.

Nothing to be mad at. This is a classic tale of how you can't make a ho a housewife. Lesson learned for you.

I live in a suburb about 45 minutes from DC.

Do you usually game there or in DC?

[Ternarydemonite]

She is not loyal, and therefore has lost every point as for girlfriend mterial. You hold your fame quite well. Do not contact her until she comes to you. Make her mind to be full of doubt and insecurity, proceed for some last fuck sessions, and then dump her.

As for the guy, well when having the chance to fuck you don't really ask or care if she is in a relationship or not. As long as you are not caught on the spot, you don't really care nor wish to destroy a relationship.

[Vuk]

I stopped reading after "Started off as a ONS, but didn't begin a relationship until about a month after".

Why would you ever jump into a relationship with a chick who let you have it the first night you met?? Come on man that is rule #1 right there...

[your_father]

I'm sorry to hear that this happened to you, but I've got to say that I think you handled the situation very well there. Very mature, I don't think many people will be able to deal with this very well at all, I don't think that I would. Your girlfriend (probably ex- by now) didn't have the right to call you a prick. Don't buy into her drama of crying and all, if she truly cared about you, all of this behind the back cheating wouldn't have happened in the first place.

[Remington]

(10-02-2013 12:57 PM)Hencredible Casanova Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 12:45 PM)Remington Wrote:  

(10-02-2013 12:14 PM)Hencredible Casanova Wrote:  

OP - where do you live? Sounds like a small city to me.

Either way, not surprising though. Given she was an ONS, it's important to remember she was always a slut. Also, based on what you said about how all the other girls in the meantime that were showing you interest didn't remotely compare to her in looks, it's a given that other dudes were showing her interest as well.

Nothing to be mad at. This is a classic tale of how you can't make a ho a housewife. Lesson learned for you.

I live in a suburb about 45 minutes from DC.

Do you usually game there or in DC?

I've done both. Getting to DC is a bitch but it sometimes has its ups. Usually just go into Arlington and game. There are some decent lounges and bars around the area that have their moments. Going to go out locally tonight and game and see what happens.

[OGNorCal707]

I guess the consensus is that you played it well, but I wouldn't have reacted like that. I'm not a violent guy, but there is no way in hell I could go get a beer and act "chill" with some guy who was just banging my girlfriend, assuming that she was in fact your GF and you were supposed to be in a "monogomous" relationship with her, especially if you were dating her for 6 months (that's kind of a long time).

Sure my gut reaction would be to beat the guy's face in, hopefully I will never be in that situation, because when I truly have feeling for a girl I want a sense of "ownership" over her, seeing her getting fucked by another guy just might send me over the edge, where I can no longer keep my thoughts, emotions, and instincts in check, I could see myself having a psycho/emotional break, and just going ape shit.

That said, good for you for keeping your composure. I would basically have told her to eat shit, and that she's a fucking whore, and best of luck to her. The last thing I'd want to do would be to hang out with that other "bro" and then see her when I got home. If she was waiting on my doorstep, the only thing I'd invite her in would be to piss on her fucking face.

I'm sure she was upset by your lack of emotions, that's why she started babbling some crazy shit and stormed off, she wanted you to throw a fit and show her how much you care. However, there is no reconciling with a chick at that point, that's just about the worst thing a man can experience with his girl.

[Stratos]

What you did was much better than just walk out with your tail between your legs. You got control of the situation back in some fashion. I think you'll laugh about this years later most importantly and would have regretted just walking out and saying nothing. I'd be telling the story for years. What you do next depends on what you want. Is this chick worth some future bangs? if so then why would you care if she's banging someone else. She's a player, just like you and me. Respect! But obviously not GF material. If you want an FB who's not banging someone else, it's easy to do, just meet a shy pretty girl at the art museum or anything other than at a bar starting out as a ONS. Then you don't even have to put that much effort into fucking them hard enough to drop the "other guys". There are women who are players and women who aren't. Figure out the difference and you won't be surprised again.

[Samseau]

1. How did a "relationship" happen? Hopefully it wasn't you who asked for exclusivity. If it was, then shame on you for trying to lockdown a woman you barely knew.

2. When she was back at your place, you should have said, "Get me a girl to have a threesome with or else we're through," and then kicked her out. Either she gets you sex or she doesn't, but at least you could have gotten something out of it.

3. Never take this girl seriously again (obviously).

[Mujeriego]

I wouldn't have spent time getting a beer with the guy but I couldn't be mad at him. She made the decision to give him the pussy and he took it like any straight guy would do.

[Feo]

Nicely done. Calm and slightly calculated.

Personally, I would have anger banged her in the ass and then walked her down the hall and pass her on to my housemates. Just to really let the new dynamic sink in.

I would keep fucking her though, just wrap it up.

[Therapsid]

Forget about this hoe and go out starting tonight like you're a man on a mission to get laid.

This could be a good time for you - you may not have much approach anxiety because you've got nothing to lose. After all, what rejection could be worse than walking in to see your girlfriend getting screwed by another guy?

[Remington]

(10-02-2013 02:08 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

1. How did a "relationship" happen? Hopefully it wasn't you who asked for exclusivity. If it was, then shame on you for trying to lockdown a woman you barely knew.

2. When she was back at your place, you should have said, "Get me a girl to have a threesome with or else we're through," and then kicked her out. Either she gets you sex or she doesn't, but at least you could have gotten something out of it.

3. Never take this girl seriously again (obviously).

She introduced me as her boyfriend a month after the ONS so I just went with it. Pretty weak moment but oh well.

When I saw her waiting for me at my place, I was surprised that she came over. Didn't really know what to say so I kept my mouth shut.

[Remington]

Received a text from her about an hour ago that said "We need to talk." Time for radio silence. My text game is garbage anyways.

[w00t]

Yeah just never talk to her again.