[dly267]

Will try to make this short. Been texting this girl. I get the vibe she thinks I'm cute, but not enough to where she'll meet me halfway effort-wise, so to speak. So I've been doing all the chasing and heavy lifting. She seems to like my flirting with her. A couple times we texted until 3am. She agreed to go out on a date, but gave me one of those "I can't this week, but next week, I should be good" lines. This was before later saying "you'll have to remind me". Lol. So I did. She said it turns out she has to work that Sunday. As time went on, it sounded legit based on what I remembered when I used to work there with her.

But even so, it feels like.. she's down with the thought of going out, but not to the point where she wants to commit herself to when. Almost where both scenarios cancel each other out. This is all only a week in the making, so I guess it's still early. Do you guys think I should tell her I want to hang out, just to hang out.. and to not be scared I want something serious? Or something else.

[tylerdurden1993]

Just my opinion here but the way shes flaked on you a couple of times and the way you're asking for advice about a particular girl on here you've already put her on a pedestal. With the texting as well till 3am I think itd be better if you only texted to set something up and be direct.
My advice on how to proceed would be to cool things off, and see what happens and I f you want to meet up only text her to set something up.

[Hoodlum]

You're an orbiter. You're just giving her attention without getting anything in return. As mentioned above, go direct, and if she still balks, cut it off.

I never go more than 3 or 4 messages from the first one without setting up a date.

[ryanf]

Just by reading the title, I already had answered no. After reading the content, my opinion is unchanged.

[Samseau]

When girls like you they'll hang with you on the same day you meet them.

Judge by her actions not her words. She's avoiding you, but you also are being a huge pussy when it comes to asking her out.

Just say, "Look, I got some time this Wed, let's go get some drinks/watch a movie/etc."

She either accepts or rejects. Nothing to it man. If she rejects hunt other women and forget about her until she walks into your life again.

[Ternarydemonite]

If a girl really likes you, she will find a timeslot to meet you. I have had my share of attention seeking girls, and it is advisable that if she doesn't agree to an specific time after two invitations, and sometimes one, next her. if you continue the pursue, you just become an orbiter.

Exceptions: she cancels a set date but proposes you another day. If she cancels, even by call, but fails to set a new day, she just isn't that interested.

I concur that the texting amount should be kept way lower, and never until 3 am. Otherwise, you only feed her attention ego.

[dly267]

Preciate it, guys. Yea, she wasn't exactly all enthusiastic as far as etching in stone when to hang out. There are a lot of details I'm leaving out to avoid a long story. But with them in mind, I think I did a decent job ruining my chances on my own. By not having a whole lot of options, I took it out on the one girl that showed a "little" interest.

If I had a crystal ball, should we had finally ended up hanging out, it probably wouldn't have been for a very long while. Maybe several, several weeks later. It would have required an incredible amount of cool and patience on my part. And probably catching her in a vulnerable moment where she was finally curious about me and what I got going on why I'm not being all up on her. But I'm not Nostradamus, so who knows if that would have really made a difference.

I sent what probably is my last text to her about 3-4 hours ago. Asked about next weekend. Haven't heard back from her and I probably won't. Sounds weird to say I almost subconsciously sent that on purpose to sabotage my own efforts just so I can get this whole thing behind me and not think about her, as much as it sucks that I'll have to.

[dly267]

Just had to share an update with y'all before I fall asleep. A couple minutes ago, 1 A.M. my time, out of nowhere, she just responded to my text about next weekend by saying, sure. I honestly wasn't expecting that. I then texted back by saying, cool, and how she woke me up just now to an Angry Birds video game I dozed off to on my phone. She responded and started cracking up laughing.

This is the point where I usually text back to keep the conversation going. But for the first time ever, I haven't. I was even tempted to say "hey, I'll let you go. Talk to you later.", but I didn't even do that. She's done it to me a couple times where the conversation will end at night with me texting whatever, and she won't respond until I text her again the next day or something.

After listening to you guys and also to myself, I guess it's pretty evident how I should proceed at this point, if I want anything to materialize.

[Samseau]

Now, when you hang out follow the these three steps:

1. Get some drinks
2. Go back to your place
3. Bang

DON'T PUSSY OUT ON THIS, just do it. If she likes you she'll go right along, if she's not into you she'll refuse to go back to your place, and if she likes you but doesn't want sex she'll go back to your place but find a way to maintain sexual tension while avoiding sex.

No matter the outcome, YOU ARE THE MAN AND SHE EXPECTS YOU TO ACT LIKE ONE, so don't puss out. PUSH forward like a fucking soldier and get that bang.

Take her back to your place, make out with her, stick your hand down your pants and start fingering her, then take off her pants and take out your cock and have her suck it. Then thrown her on your bed, take out a condom, and fuck her.

[XXL]

Text her "let's meet at xxx place so I can take advantage of you already, i'm free on X or Y day?" [no smiles!]

PS. Don't read into too much that she's taking a while to respond. You never know what is happening in her life. And definitely don't buy into "she would respond immediately if she liked you" BS. Yeah right, she doesn't even know you yet. Besides, she's a girl. Her emotions change often throughout the day and her thoughts/actions follow her emotions. She finds out her favorite actor gets married and she's fucking pissed and doesn't care about some guy [you] wanting to meet her. Irrelevant. So be cool.