[Giovonny]

As you enter any social setting..

In line at the store, on the subway, at the deli, at the market, at the bar, at the bus stop, in class, as you enter a restaurant, in the hotel lobby, at the airport, as you exit your car, as you step off the plane, at a party, getting lunch, waiting for your table, walking thru the mall, etc., etc. Speak Up!

Be in a chatty mood. Aggressively look for opportunities to make comments.

Comment on the surroundings, the situation, clothes, food, other people, etc,. etc.

When you enter a social scence and you speak first..

You:

A) "Break the Ice" -- Not only for others but also for yourself.

B) Establish and demonstrate your Social Competence and Confidence. If you say something quite clever, you can even establish social dominance and get an advantage on other more quiet guys.

C) Get yourself into a conversational flow.

I try do it as soon as I leave my house. I usually talk to the first person I see. When I park my car, I talk to the first person I see.

When I enter a room or a store, I am eager to chat.

Get into this habit. Development

Your environment is filled with things to talk about.

The more you talk, the faster your game will improve.

The less you talk, the more you are staying trapped in your own mind.

Some examples:

Situational Openers

[soup]

Gio you are the man.

[Onto]

Great post!

I was kinda just thinking about this today.

In order to do well in chatting up beautiful women I must also practice with those I don't want to be with.

[Giovonny]

(08-16-2013 03:15 PM)soup Wrote:  

Gio you are the man.

No, you are!

I have learned a lot from you, you crazy mother fucker!

[Nascimento]

I like to do this sometimes too.

And don't think you need something clever, witty or well thought out..

Two days ago I walked into sunglasses hut and just before she had a chance to welcome me I said '...Sunglasses!'

[EisenBarde]

Gio is on a roll today.

[slothpiece]

I do this going into work everyday. I say good morning or happy friday or whatever. I know I've got to start the morning off right because there's a shit ton of work to do that day, so I know I need to get myself in gear for what lies ahead. Most of the girls in the office don't respond quick enough that I just roll past them if they're not quick on their feet before I even have my first cup of coffee... and I'm not a morning person. Hello to the security guard, hello or head nod to the people entering the elevator, hello to the bellhop guy near my office... just anybody just to get the juices flowing. Three second rule or faster.

[Samseau]

Gio I've always done this everywhere I go. Although on some days I don't feel like talking, but most of the time I'm very social. It doesn't matter if you're trying to get laid. Being social simply makes life better.

It's weird, pretty much everyone I speak to talks back to me. I haven't been "blown out" in over a year.

With experience, you understand what environments you excel in, and you also learn how to conduct your behavior to always appear fun and interesting.

Good stuff for newbs.

[OGNorCal707]

Simple yet effective, sometimes instead of over-analyzing and disecting game and making it more complex than we need to, we should be going back to the basics, the fundamentals. Gio's post seems basic on the surface, but that's part of the brilliance behind it, the interaction begins when you speak, part of the reason why I never got any where with day game is I always let me anxiety get the best of me and rarely made approaches. Situational openers and commenting on the surroundings is one of the best ways to initiate conversation, especially if you are able to do it in a clever or witty way.

This is my favorite part of the post and something I hope Gio will explore more in the future:

"B) Establish and demonstrate your Social Competence and Confidence. If you say something quite clever, you can even establish social dominance and get an advantage on other more quiet guys."

I like the concept of exerting "social dominance", I can see how it can successfully be done and as anyone whose been in the game for a while, it's something you've experienced pulling off. Guys seem like they always try to subtly use physical dominance in many ways, but in my opinion social dominance is the next level and really what you want to achieve when trying to seduce women.

[soup]

(08-16-2013 10:21 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

Simple yet effective, sometimes instead of over-analyzing and disecting game and making it more complex than we need to, we should be going back to the basics, the fundamentals. Gio's post seems basic on the surface, but that's part of the brilliance behind it, the interaction begins when you speak, part of the reason why I never got any where with day game is I always let me anxiety get the best of me and rarely made approaches. Situational openers and commenting on the surroundings is one of the best ways to initiate conversation, especially if you are able to do it in a clever or witty way.

This is my favorite part of the post and something I hope Gio will explore more in the future:

"B) Establish and demonstrate your Social Competence and Confidence. If you say something quite clever, you can even establish social dominance and get an advantage on other more quiet guys."

I like the concept of exerting "social dominance", I can see how it can successfully be done and as anyone whose been in the game for a while, it's something you've experienced pulling off. Guys seem like they always try to subtly use physical dominance in many ways, but in my opinion social dominance is the next level and really what you want to achieve when trying to seduce women.

All that first generation PUA stuff gets knocked a lot around here, but Neil Strauss was saying this stuff years ago:

Social intelligence demonstrates value.

[Thomas the Rhymer]

(08-16-2013 03:12 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I usually talk to the first person I see. When I park my car, I talk to the first person I see.

I'm going to try this. Thanks Gio!

[IpsaScientiaPotestasEst]

Similar to the daygame hack, just chat up people everywhere you go. People (especially nowadays) tend to feel seriously disconnected from others due to how digital communication has become nowadays and what not. Studies have even shown, when people are walking around and someone (a stranger) acknowledges them with simply a smile or some type of greeting-they will feel a lot happier. If someone does that opposite, and basically looks through that person like they are not there or ignores them-people get depressed.

We are social animals. Develop the skill. Learn how to work people. People are used to the same old bullshit every day, "Hi hows it going?' 'Good' they will respond. Its usually bullshit and you're not getting anywhere in that conversation. Be real. 'Hey how its going?' 'Same ollllld shit, different day.' Humor will come from that. Making people laugh, engaging them or making them feel good makes me feel good (and I would think the same from yall as well). That gets transferred to the next interaction and creates the momentum. Plus..who knows, maybe I'll run into a next looking lady right after and I'm already feeling good. Game isn't just women, its people. It's your life and how you treat it. People wanna meet cool, fun people that make their lives and everyone around them better.

Become that person....or at least develop the skill. This goes without mentioning, but having these types of 'soft' skills in a career will also help greatly.

[EasyMoney]

Another fine piece of advice Gio. This is so true - social gregariousness signals confidence and a lack of fear - which girls like.

[eradicator]

(08-16-2013 10:17 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

Gio I've always done this everywhere I go. Although on some days I don't feel like talking, but most of the time I'm very social. It doesn't matter if you're trying to get laid. Being social simply makes life better.

It's weird, pretty much everyone I speak to talks back to me. I haven't been "blown out" in over a year.

With experience, you understand what environments you excel in, and you also learn how to conduct your behavior to always appear fun and interesting.

Good stuff for newbs.

Good stuff period. Even if you already know all of this, it's always good to be reminded of the importance of frame and social skills.

[Cyr]

A good point you made is that not talking keeps you trapped in your own mind. If you don't make an effort to do a lot of social interaction, you become more distant and it becomes more difficult. You can identify someone who is too wrapped in their own thoughts just by sight and they dont give off a good vibe.

[Giovonny]

(08-16-2013 10:21 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

This is my favorite part of the post and something I hope Gio will explore more in the future:

"B) Establish and demonstrate your Social Competence and Confidence. If you say something quite clever, you can even establish social dominance and get an advantage on other more quiet guys."

I like the concept of exerting "social dominance"

We often think that "alpha" and "dominance" means being big and strong. But, we can also "dominate" with our social skills. If we have everyone engaged, laughing, and feeling good, then we are adding major value to the environment. We are displaying our social intelligence.

I like the Neil Strauss quote -- "Social intelligence demonstrates value".

I say -- "The tongue is the most powerful muscle in the body"

This is how an average looking guy can get a good looking girl. Social Dominance.

(08-18-2013 08:48 AM)IpsaScientiaPotestasEst Wrote:  

'soft' skills

Great post.

I'm jealous that I didn't write it myself!

"Soft Skills" are very underrated in all life.

People skills are often more important then technical skills.

(08-19-2013 11:40 PM)EasyMoney Wrote:  

Social gregariousness signals confidence and a lack of fear - which girls like.

Well said.

I like that phrase -- "Social gregariousness"

(08-20-2013 08:20 AM)Cyr Wrote:  

A good point you made is that not talking keeps you trapped in your own mind.

This is the most important thing.

The faster you talk, the faster you get out of your own head.

Not talking is a surefire way to stay to stay lost in your own mind.

Engage the world! Engage your environment!

Speak!

[PizzaSult]

I try to do this as often as possible. When I working behind a bar for a while I very quickly realised how much I appreciated the customers who’d spend a bit of time interacting with me. The difference between the people who just ordered their drinks, and those that took the time to respond to me asking how they were doing was vast. And it worked in their favour, the people who I’d connect with, would be the people who I’d go to first.

So, it’s in your own best interest to interact with people, as you know never know when they’ll be in a position to help. Social engineering at its simplest.

[iknowexactly]

(08-18-2013 08:48 AM)IpsaScientiaPotestasEst Wrote:  

....
People (especially nowadays) tend to feel seriously disconnected from others due to how digital communication has become nowadays

We are social animals. Develop the skill. Learn how to work people. People are used to the same old bullshit every day, "Hi hows it going?' 'Good' they will respond.

Another good thread from G, thanks.

It's true on both points. People feel ignored because they sit (or stand depending on their social status) there making money for someone else who doesn't give two shits about them.

Just a "Hi" is marginally positive, but I always ask clerks etc "How's work going today" and and it definitely escalates the interaction to a slightly higher level of intimacy without threatening them.

I'm currently working on how to build on that , maybe I should try to get to some thing like "what would you rather be doing".

It's hard to get to it gracefully without it being blatant hitting on them.

I've been trying "What do you do for fun" and girls often seem uncomfortable with it, like the "game detector" goes off. I guess if they have a boyfriend, they don't want to say "fuck my boyfriend's brains out"
and if they don't they don't want to reveal a dreary existence surfing Facewhore.

But time is limited with hired hands, so I'm still figuring it out.

[Therapsid]

(08-23-2013 11:06 AM)iknowexactly Wrote:  

I've been trying "What do you do for fun" and girls often seem uncomfortable with it, like the "game detector" goes off.

Learning to stop asking the "what do you do for fun" question was one of my first lessons in game. There's inherently nothing wrong with it, just like there's nothing wrong with asking a girl what she does for a living.

But they shouldn't be your default questions upon meeting a girl.

Thinking about it, there are a few reasons why it's often a bad question.

1. It puts the onus on the girl to continue the conversation. She has to come up with a new conversational thread on the spot. It's asking her to make a big investment too early.

2. Most girls aren't that interesting. If a girl's idea of fun is going out drinking, going on Facebook, and texting her friends how is she supposed to answer this question?

3. It's too transparent. That's why their "game detector" goes off. A guy who asks it obviously doesn't care what the girl does for fun. The reason why Roosh's elderly openers work is because they're unusual and specific enough to be plausible.

Speaking of elderly openers, I use them on weeknights at bars when the energy is sedate and there are only a couple of attractive girls. It's weird how guys are scared to approach not just during the day, but even at 8 at night at a local dive. Last night I saw a girl who was alone and nobody approached, except for a couple of guys who tried to talk to her from like six feet away (what the hell?). So, when I approached she was immediately receptive, because obviously no girl goes alone to a bar to *not* have guys approach them. Going to try to go for the bang with her tonight.

[solo]

(08-16-2013 10:21 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

Simple yet effective, sometimes instead of over-analyzing and disecting game and making it more complex than we need to, we should be going back to the basics, the fundamentals. Gio's post seems basic on the surface, but that's part of the brilliance behind it, the interaction begins when you speak, part of the reason why I never got any where with day game is I always let me anxiety get the best of me and rarely made approaches. Situational openers and commenting on the surroundings is one of the best ways to initiate conversation, especially if you are able to do it in a clever or witty way.

This is my favorite part of the post and something I hope Gio will explore more in the future:

"B) Establish and demonstrate your Social Competence and Confidence. If you say something quite clever, you can even establish social dominance and get an advantage on other more quiet guys."

I like the concept of exerting "social dominance", I can see how it can successfully be done and as anyone whose been in the game for a while, it's something you've experienced pulling off. Guys seem like they always try to subtly use physical dominance in many ways, but in my opinion social dominance is the next level and really what you want to achieve when trying to seduce women.

I just came back from having seen a girl with a nice ass walking her dog. So I opened her with "what a nice dog you have, what race is it?" Of course not all girls have dogs though, so sometimes it's trickier to come up with situational openers. But usually one is able to come up with something if one is creative enough.

Regarding social dominance. When I was a kid I was very shy in some social situations around girls. At the school discos, for instance, I would typically not talk to the girls, just kept to myself and became trapped in my own mind.

After I started practicing game (first unconsciously and then consciously) I noticed how it was now other guys around me who were paralyzed. Like Gio says, it's important to be the first to speak and take initiative. Then you get warmed up and establish social dominance while the other guys tend to freeze.

[jamaicabound]

Great advice and great at just getting you in a better mindset in women, business everything. I've heard some other forum members say similar things in the past so It's something I've been trying to implement into my day. Not just with attractive women or even women I would hit on but everyone, whether its a guy running the register at the gas station or an 80 year old lady rnning the register at walgreens say hello, make some small talk, give someone a compliment if you have a genuine one to give about their glasses, shirt whatever. It just kinda gets you out of your shell and also I think many people are kind of pleasantly surprised there's still friendly people out there. Occasionally when you first start doing this some people may act like your wierd for being friendly, in reality your the normal one and we have gotten very antiscoial with evryone looking at their feet or playing on their phone instead of actually engaging with people. That can almost turn you off to doing this but power through it. I think most people you encounter are pleasantly surprised someone is friendly.

[WanderingSoul]

I had forgotten this post. 100% spot on.

Gio knocking it out of the park with simple ass yet hugely important advice. As usual.

[Giovonny]

I'm glad this thread got bumped because this is very practical and helpful advice.

Much of my success has come from being aggressively chatty and speaking up in social environments!

Being the first one to speak shows confidence. If you can say something cleaver, you are really getting off to a good start.

Again, being the first one to speak:

- "Breaks the ice" for you and the people around you.

- Establishes your social confidence and competence

- Get you into a conversational flow.

***

Here are a few recent examples..

I parked my car at the beach, a group of strangers were gathered around the dog park, as I walked closer to them, I noticed that no one was really talking to each other...

I saw a dog wearing a collar made of flowers, the owner was a cute asian girl, the dog walked near me.. I said...

me: did your dog go to Hawaii?
her: hahaha yes

A couple people laughed.

I chatted with the girl.

---

I walked down to the beach, a group of people were walking up passed me, no one was saying much.. A cute latina was walking right towards me..

me: how was your walk?
her: oh good
me: What did you do?

She stopped and chatted.

---

As I was leaving the beach, I saw a cute girl in the parking lot.. I walked past her as she was getting into her car..

me: what year is your prius?
her: 2010

We chatted, I got her number.

---

I was ready to talk, ready to make a comment, ready to speak, I was looking for anything to talk about, anything to "break the ice" and make conversation.

This is a simple concept that has brought me a lot of pussy and helped me to increase my social skills!

[Druber]

(08-20-2013 08:20 AM)Cyr Wrote:  

A good point you made is that not talking keeps you trapped in your own mind. If you don't make an effort to do a lot of social interaction, you become more distant and it becomes more difficult. You can identify someone who is too wrapped in their own thoughts just by sight and they dont give off a good vibe.

Being stuck in your head is a hazard. You need to actively be aware of the outside world. Example; I tend to try to cold read people in public (just don't make it too obvious!), or just notice something to take your mind off your own headspace.

[456]

^^ I eat alone at bars [with good food] frequently, and if I get into phone-reading mode, it's hard to engage even when someone is taking the initiative.

So I feel that!

When I keep my phone in my pocket the entire meal, it's insane how fascinating the environment becomes, even if I'm not interacting with anyone -- the various convos, employee "drama" plotlines, etc. As long as you don't focus on the TV. Bars without TV are great, by the way.

A lot easier to make a stray comment, or catch one, and get into a social mood.