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thoughts on silence
#1

thoughts on silence

Any body have anecdotes or success using the silent treatment on a gf/fiance/wife/dirty hooker? Specifically, if they are complaining or bitching at you for supposed wrongs you have committed. In my experience, engaging them briefly in the beginning to acknowledge their gripe and then sitting quietly while doing other things or driving works best. It usually takes them a few minutes of yappinh before they realize they are being ignored. I have had my woman do this...then realize i am not listening. We sit in silence for hours sometimes if we are driving somewhere. Then 45 min later she will go..."sooo are we just not talking anymore then?"

Every single time it is all i can do not to start laughing.

The tried and true, "are you finished?" is always a good one too.
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#2

thoughts on silence

Silence and walking away from a fight with a woman is par for the course. This is what most men do because they can't out emote a woman.

For whatever reason the idea that you can John Wayne a broad into a submissive state is another one of those alpha fantasies.

In actual practice, I've let a many a chick go into hysterics while staying stone faced. That Billy Dee Williams style did a couple of things

1. Made her more mad, and she tantrummed even harder
2. put emotional distance between the 2 of us

I've always looked at this kind of behavior as manipulative, just like crying. But even with that in mind, a chick is trying to tell you something.

Do you want to jump through the hoops to keep her happy, not only do what she asks, but prevent the emotional episode from happening in the 1st place?

That to me is the great burden of every relationship.

As far as I know, if you want to keep in a relationship can't get out of this.

The only way is that you're so self interested that you really don't care if she's feeling pain and stress.

WIA
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#3

thoughts on silence

Those are good points. I do agree that you can not completely shut down if you want the relationship to last. In my experience using the tactic it has usually only been when her ranting has fallen to the disrespectful or completely childish level. I will engage up until that point, I see it more as a cooling off period to let her emotions loosen their grip on her mouth.

In nearly all instances it has had the desired result and we continued the discussion or fixes the problem later. With almost no surprise these situations often arise during that special week each month.
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#4

thoughts on silence

I like the john wayne analogy, might need to use that one sometime
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#5

thoughts on silence

For me, the problem is never fixed, cause if it's not this one thing, it's something else.

It's always something and it never ends, unless you become the source of the drama - where she has to constantly change her behavior to meet your fanciful needs. For most guys is just as exhausting.

Minter (rip) talked about this a lot, and for those of us who've had multiple ltr's, it rang quite true.

WIA
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#6

thoughts on silence

In case of emergency I like > THIS < way
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#7

thoughts on silence

Silence works well in almost any situation.

It has its place in music, with well placed pauses. Silent pauses in conversation are important sometimes to make a point or let a concept "sink in". Sales people use silent pauses to let the potential buyer think about something. Comedians use silent pauses that are sometimes funnier then saying something.

And of course in Gaming. What works well for me is just not calling a girl at all. Lets say we have hung out a few times but not banged. I will just stop calling her. Usually a week or 2 goes by and then they contact me. They are always more eager to hang out and see me after I have ignored them for a while. I think its because I wasn't chasing and pursuing them. If I would have contacted them every week they would feel like I am not a challenge. I have learned to just have fun with them once or twice and then give them the silent treatment. It works well. If they come back, you got um. If they don't come back, you never had them anyways.
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#8

thoughts on silence

Most often men and women get mad at the other for one reason. They feel the other is enjoying their freedom at the others expense. If you can deduce what freedom you're enjoying at her expense and help her to see that's what is really at issue, then you'll both be "really" communicating and in a much deeper way than 95% of the population.
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#9

thoughts on silence

Xxl i like your thinking, but it thankfully hasnt reached that level.

I didnt ever read much of Minter. Like him i am getting married here soon, the only difference is i didnt spend my time pre-engagement railing about how marriage sucks.

I am looking forward to getting married because i know how to manage expectations and the relationship in the right way. A lot of that has to do with the likes of roissy and roosh and others. There is a generation of mine coming into their prime years and whether they stay single and lay waste to the ladies or get married, the mindset and collective information we have here is absolutely crucial to their future success and happiness.
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#10

thoughts on silence

Quote: (08-14-2013 03:36 PM)el duderino Wrote:  

i am getting married here

All I can really say is good luck.

If you posting on the forums then you know what marriage entails. . .and you're doing it anyway. So all I gotta say is just. . .good luck.

Now of course if you were getting to some 18 year old brown fuck machine somewhere in SEA and you were 65+, had your finances in control (i.e. being set for the rest of your, your wife's and your children's lives) and didn't have to work if you didn't want to, then I would be giving you a round of applause.

But. . .

Good luck.

Isaiah 4:1
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#11

thoughts on silence

CJ W. I feel prepared for it and all that it entails. I was raised right by a father who raised his boys to be good alpha men who are not walked on. I also picked a girl who has no desire to be a career woman, is feminine and thin. Her mom is hot too so that helps. She has made it quite clear she wants to be a stay at home mother who cleans and makes dinner. i would say theres a good base to work off of.

And when i am 65...an 18 yr old from SEA sounds like a good idea to me.

Thats part of the reason i started getting more active inthe manosphere instead of just reading. Hopefully by being more active i can help other guys out too as much as i have been helped. Roosh, roissy and all those guys helped immensely with what they wrote and discussed. Relationship and marriage game is an important part of the equation as well.
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#12

thoughts on silence

Quote: (08-14-2013 02:06 PM)el duderino Wrote:  

Any body have anecdotes or success using the silent treatment on a gf/fiance/wife/dirty hooker? Specifically, if they are complaining or bitching at you for supposed wrongs you have committed. In my experience, engaging them briefly in the beginning to acknowledge their gripe and then sitting quietly while doing other things or driving works best. It usually takes them a few minutes of yappinh before they realize they are being ignored. I have had my woman do this...then realize i am not listening. We sit in silence for hours sometimes if we are driving somewhere. Then 45 min later she will go..."sooo are we just not talking anymore then?"

Every single time it is all i can do not to start laughing.

The tried and true, "are you finished?" is always a good one too.

It always surprises me how the elementary basics of game are extremely powerful in seeming "bigger" situations.

I like to think of certain game concepts as compound lifts (squats, bench, deadlifts, etc). They are fundamental. They apply whether you're approaching a girl for the first time or after years of a relationship. Some of them apply at the workplace, in coercing peers, superiors, and drones to follow your lead or bestow favor upon you. Want to know which one I'm talking about?

Agree and amplify.

There is no single greater power move than agree and amplify.

Girl in a bar: "Do you say that to all the girls?"
You: "Yes, especially girls with snaggle-teeth like you. It's a fetish of mine" (She'll be offended. Initiate push-pull with humor)

Your girlfriend of 4 years: "Am I getting fat?"
You: "Your hips have definitely gotten bigger. You know how much I love them wide birthing hips." (She'll be offended and grossed out. Girls in LTRs love abuse and cruelty. Most of them also don't want kids and consider childbirth gross or creepy)

Your coworkers: "We've gotten complaints that you're behavior comes across as arrogant."
You: "I absolutely agree. It's clear that there's a shortage of people here that give a shit."

Girls bitching at you for "supposed wrongs you have committed", as you put it: shit testing 101.

Silence is okay. It's a little more old-school. It's what your grandpa would have done to let his woman know that he's angry and not to fuck with him. These days though, it still gives women the upper hand. Same with, "Are you done?" That's something a woman would say to a man she's trying to belittle. Female tactics.

What you really want is boldness, something where after you say your piece, she's sitting there with her eyebrows raised, thinking, "Shit. I was NOT expecting that."

"Did you clean up like I asked you to?"
"Of course not. I'm the king of the castle and you're my wench."

"Did you remember our double dinner date with so-and-so on Friday night?"
"Yes, that's why I scheduled a Scotch tasting with my friends. Let me know how dinner goes."

She'll react to a lot of these with anger, and you can't be pulling stuff this bold if you've been a pussy up to this point. Takes a transition period. But even with her ensuing anger, you keep your frame and then work in some humor and affection into it.

While telling her she's your wench and you're the king of the castle, you go up to her and start grabbing her ass. You pin her against the wall and rub her pussy, and then walk away leaving her confused.

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#13

thoughts on silence

The dude, all good points about keeping hand in the relationship/marriage. I do employ many of them myself in addition to the silent treatment.

The way i see it, if your girl is saying things like "youre such an asshole, but i just cant help but love you"...then you are probably doing things right.

When i slap her ass in public or in semi innapropriate places (church, in the check out line, her grandmothers house) i get the stern furl of her eyebrows but there is nothing but firey passion in her eyes. Often she is trying not to smile as well.
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#14

thoughts on silence

If a girl you're in a relationship with gives you too much drama, spank her. Then wipe her tears and fuck her.
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#15

thoughts on silence

Quote: (08-14-2013 04:11 PM)el duderino Wrote:  

CJ W. I feel prepared for it and all that it entails. I was raised right by a father who raised his boys to be good alpha men who are not walked on. I also picked a girl who has no desire to be a career woman, is feminine and thin. Her mom is hot too so that helps. She has made it quite clear she wants to be a stay at home mother who cleans and makes dinner. i would say theres a good base to work off of.

And when i am 65...an 18 yr old from SEA sounds like a good idea to me.

Thats part of the reason i started getting more active inthe manosphere instead of just reading. Hopefully by being more active i can help other guys out too as much as i have been helped. Roosh, roissy and all those guys helped immensely with what they wrote and discussed. Relationship and marriage game is an important part of the equation as well.

Well shit, then, you're all set. The woman you mention reminds me of a woman I met in College who was adamantly against feminism. I learned a lot of stuff from her. . .I wasn't attracted to her at all but she still looked nice all the time.

Isaiah 4:1
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#16

thoughts on silence

If you find the right girl, act like a grown man, and take to heart the ideas and suggestions at places like the roosh forum...i think marriage isnt always so bad. I think a lot of guys just give up because its hard to maintain the frame and fight the rest of society. Then everything goes to crap and theyre getting pounded in divorce court.

I am debating injecting some redpill thoughts into my grooms speech at the reception. Thoughts?
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