[iamdegaussed]

I'm reasonably new but gaining experience every day. Was hardcore beta for the longest time, I'll spare you the details but the changes brought on by reading Roosh, Roissy and the rest of the 'sphere changed me completely.

Last year was when I really started to reap the benefits and was able to start dating two girls at the same time and I eventually wanted to break it off with the one, pretty much because she was less attractive than the other whom I wanted to pursue a LTR.

For a whole week after I did it I felt like a monster, especially coz she cried in front of me and I had to take classes with her and see her frequently afterward. I basically felt like I made that girl, who basically had done nothing wrong (except not being as hot as someone else), pay for what other girls had done to me in my past life as a beta?

Any advice for getting around this feeling because I know I'm going to experience it in the future as I progress. Is there a way to fully convince yourself that none of these girls are innocent or will I just need to experience enough of them cheating on their boyfriends with me til I discover that the stained glass window is really finger paints on construction paper?

[d3traktion]

how did you make her pay for what girls had done in the past? you had options and you picked the one you preferred. i think about this sometimes as well but don't let it get you down

Sidenote: sometimes you have to choose between your happiness and someone else's happiness, would the other girl have 'paid' had you picked the less attractive one?

[Jonathon]

I would say this is simply going to take some time and more work. It's the beta child still in you and you haven't entirely slit his throat yet.

Keep pushing and remember that your happiness is more important than pleasing every person you interact with on a daily basis.

[iamdegaussed]

nah the prettier girl had options at that time too but was really pushing for a relationship with me which made me fold when I should've just kept both of them on rotation.

thanks for the advice though. I figured this was something that would go away with time, I just wanted to see if anyone else here had that "goddamn I'm awful" moment in the beginning after crushing a girl. Especially coz a lot of the sphere seems to kind of take a sociopathic pleasure in it.

[Ternarydemonite]

You simply exercised your options. All the other girls who in the past flaked or dumped you did the same thing.

[j r]

You didn't make anyone pay for anything. Women cry all the time. Chances are she got over it and on to the next dude,or dudes, in short order.

The real question is why did you break it off? You should have just kept seeing both of them until one of them tried to force you to be exclusive. Even then, you can keep both going for some time until you really feel like committing to one.

[Parlay44]

I make them pay with the roughest angriest grudge-fucking sex I can through at them. They're no longer innocent after I'm done.

[MrXY]

Even the seemingly nicest girls are ruthless in dumping a guy when they have found a better option

[Sebastian]

Your feeling is the most important. you don't feel anything with her. why do you keep it going?
would she appreciate if you pretend you still like her?

[nek]

(08-01-2013 06:09 PM)iamdegaussed Wrote:  

nah the prettier girl had options at that time too but was really pushing for a relationship with me which made me fold when I should've just kept both of them on rotation.

thanks for the advice though. I figured this was something that would go away with time, I just wanted to see if anyone else here had that "goddamn I'm awful" moment in the beginning after crushing a girl. Especially coz a lot of the sphere seems to kind of take a sociopathic pleasure in it.

I don't think too many have a 'sociopathic' pleasure in it. In fact, if they were really sociopathic they probably wouldn't have cared enough in the first place, they'd just move on to banging another chick b/c they want to. But like what others mentioned above, they won't show you the same mercy, no matter how sweet they seem. The thing that shocks a guy's system the most is when he experiences this complete 180 women are capable of. I think this is what triggers one to start looking down the rabbit hole more than anything. It's one thing for a relationship to end and for all parties involved to move in different directions, it's another when you seem to completely not matter to a person you just spent a considerable amount of your life with and had gotten as close to as two humans can. Happened to me. I cheated on a girl, felt guilty beyond belief, absolutely ate me up, never told her about it. But when she found someone else, she forgot I existed. When she did interact with me from that point on, it was like I was a complete stranger. Guys feel more guilt cheating than women do. It's because guys cheat out of horniness, not 'love' or lack there of, for the most part. With women, these two things ('love' and horniness) are for the most part tied together. Guys cheat and still loves their wives. Women cheat and don't give a flying fuck about their husbands. This is probably the biggest red-pill lesson. See this

[iamdegaussed]

Good stuff nek. Thanks, it's what I needed to hear. I've been a victim of that complete 180 before and it's what led me to the red pill in the first place. It was sort of like "okay, this keeps happening. let's put some thought into why."

Turns out the answer was easy.

I think the difference between men and women in this situation is how powerful the female hamster is. For guys, ending a relationship with someone means hurting them in spite of emotional/financial investment and shared experience, so it hurts us too sometimes. For chicks? Their hamster will just rationalize the guy their leaving as weird/creepy/clingy/mean/etc. so they obviously had no choice but to go onto the new guy because the new guy is what they deserve.

[Beyond Borders]

(08-01-2013 06:09 PM)iamdegaussed Wrote:  

nah the prettier girl had options at that time too but was really pushing for a relationship with me which made me fold when I should've just kept both of them on rotation.

thanks for the advice though. I figured this was something that would go away with time, I just wanted to see if anyone else here had that "goddamn I'm awful" moment in the beginning after crushing a girl. Especially coz a lot of the sphere seems to kind of take a sociopathic pleasure in it.

Yeah, I definitely suffer every time I hurt a woman - maybe I'm sensitive, but I don't like hurting people. My default over the years has become to never take anything to the point of emotional involvement because every time I end up in a relationship I end up crushing her in the long run when I get bored. So now as soon as someone gets clingy, my defense mechanism is to run the other way. Of course this only seems to get them more hooked faster, but what can you do.

It's not an issue as much now that I'm always traveling.

I don't think you did anything wrong in your situation though. It would have been worse if you would have strung her along. She probably just felt rejected.

[LCPLcockstrong]

Ice. That is what you need, lots of ice where most have a heart. The killer feels no remorse when he knows it saved his own life. It's either you getting a reward for your hard work or a bad episode of Oprah. Just my two cents

[nek]

(08-03-2013 12:04 AM)LCPLcockstrong Wrote:  

Ice. That is what you need, lots of ice where most have a heart. The killer feels no remorse when he knows it saved his own life. It's either you getting a reward for your hard work or a bad episode of Oprah. Just my two cents

Bad episode of Oprah?

[nek]

(08-01-2013 07:21 PM)Ternarydemonite Wrote:  

You simply exercised your options. All the other girls who in the past flaked or dumped you did the same thing.

Life's about power. Women have a lot of it innately, and they use it very amorally (note: not Immorally). When you have power, feel free to use it as well. Furthermore, this should be a guide to what you need to do in life. Anything that increases your power. Acquire wealth (monetary power), be your own boss if possible (decision-making power), work out and learn to fight effectively (physical power).

[Spider]

Any successful relationship starts with physical attraction. Without attraction, there can't be anything more...no reason to feel guilty about that.

It's also a sign that your game is improving - If you were still a beta pussy, you would be holding onto this girl that isn't all that hot.

Improvement in game = higher standards/getting with cuter girls (usually)

Seems like this is something you should be proud of.