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Bitterness in the Manosphere
#1

Bitterness in the Manosphere

This post is motivated by Mark Minter's ex-wife revealing he is a chronically unemployed, deadbeat dad who hypocritically rails financial exploitation in divorce. Other posters whine about feminist indoctrination in college. These guys choose to take easy liberal arts classes instead of going to the math, science, economics, or business departments. They complain about HR women supervising their staff positions, instead of building autonomous responsible line careers. They even bash gays, as though gays were remotely responsible for their problems. I have already written about MRA's utter failure to read and properly cite the literature on false rape.

I'm not denying the validity of mens' problems or telling them "man up" and solve other peoples' problems. I guess the internet is a convenient place to vent, and that creates a distorted atmosphere here. Let's try to put a more positive and constructive tone on the forum. [Image: idea.gif]
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#2

Bitterness in the Manosphere

I've been thinking about this for a while now. This bitterness is just increasing the divide between genders and this goes for both feminists and red-pillers. There needs to be a way to unite both sides so society can grow again.
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#3

Bitterness in the Manosphere

It's only part of the problem.

There has been a gradual increase in the amount of pessimism lately across the entire country. We're seeing it in our own little circles now, but else where it's scary.

There is a turning point coming soon. If another shock happens to the world economy (Chinese housing bubble pop?) who knows what will happen. The general sense of pessimism won't an already stagnated economy.
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#4

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Agreed. I think the problem is a problem that the Internet as a whole has. When computers take out certain essential aspects of community-building that humans need in a effective community, the resulting communities end up more susceptible to resentment and bitterness.

It doesn't help that, especially with unmoderated forums, that the people who get the most attention are the ones who post the most despicable offensive nonsense (trolls). In a real world community, people see they are being listened to with non-verbal gestures; without those gestures, an Internet forum can feel like a very lonely place. Most trolls only post their nonsense to get attention.

I do not think a person who holds on to a resentment for too long is a successful person. Successful people look to the future and move beyond the past. I -- not the object of my resentment -- am responsible for feeling the resentment and for letting go of that resentment.

* * *
While I do not agree with Divorcio (the starter of this thread) on everything, I have enjoyed my conversations with him and am glad to have gotten to know him a little bit on this forum.
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#5

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Most men have lived a lie for 20 or more years.

Anger is a stage everyone has to go through when processing grief.

Some will get out of that stage, although most will not.

90% of people are doomed to lives of low consciousness.

But in any group of guys you're going to have people going through different life stages.

Hell, you've always struck me as a passive-aggressive, low testosterone man. Many of us, when you first started posting, thought you were a feminist troll.

You don't really offer good advice to anyone. You instead look at ways to nip at guys' heels or tell guys that we are wrong about something.

So you're in the 90% of men who are low consciousness. You may not be angry, but that's because you are low energy and have no life force within you.

What are you doing to elevate your consciousness?
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#6

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Perhaps off topic but what you just wrote made me think:

I've observed in life that the ones without success always see the big collapse around the corner. (As if they had a better chance to succeed after the revolution.) It's always the ones badly hurt by women that say the most hateful things. (People like that usually aren't too happy with themselves.) It's always the ones that emigrate from a country that have the least favourable things to say about it. And so forth.

Here's some old-man advice:

Take everything with a grain of salt. Everyone is reporting from his own vantage point. Everyone has a hidden agenda, wether conscious or sub-conscious. At the same time, try to assume that people speak truth, or their own version of it.

Winners aren't bitter. They see a situation for what it is and make their play. They don't wait for the world to change, they act now. They also don't worry about gossip and bullshit that doesn't have anything to do with them.

OP is right, "Let's try to put a more positive and constructive tone on the forum".
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#7

Bitterness in the Manosphere

The Lifestyle section is full of questions and comments from guys who are trying to figure out life problems and become better men.

What have you posted to the Lifestyle section, divorco?

You are rich. Why don't you start threads on personal finance rather than start another thread where you say men are misinterpreting false rape data and that we should unite with feminists?

And who can forget this classic: How Weaselly is Your Game?

Quote:Quote:

Some guys use weaselly manipulation game. For example, one repeated opener was asking directions. This is dishonest and potentially creepy. It displays a bad stalker mindset that you can trick women into talking to you and eventually sleeping with you.

You have stunk up the room for a long time, bro. (If that is a "personal attack" that earns me a day suspension, so be it.)
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#8

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 05:37 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

Most men have lived a lie for 20 or more years.

Anger is a stage everyone has to go through when processing grief.

I got past the "if I act like a white knight, and treat women like goddesses, I will get some pussy" lie as soon as I learned not to act like a white knight any more, and started dating women normally.

Quote:Quote:

Hell, you've always struck me as a passive-aggressive, low testosterone man. Many of us, when you first started posting, thought you were a feminist troll.

You don't really offer good advice to anyone. You instead look at ways to nip at guys' heels or tell guys that we are wrong about something.

To be fair to Divorcio, I like having him around. It's nice to have someone who disagrees with something I post and do so in an intelligent articulate manner. I'm a grown man; I don't need to downvote or censor people I disagree with and I know when to walk away once a back-and-forth thread has gotten too long.
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#9

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 02:00 PM)Divorco Wrote:  

I'm not denying the validity of mens' problems or telling them "man up" and solve other peoples' problems. I guess the internet is a convenient place to vent, and that creates a distorted atmosphere here. Let's try to put a more positive and constructive tone on the forum. [Image: idea.gif]

[Image: pot-kettle-black.jpg?w=455]

Positivity is expressed through action. Men here work on themselves, to improve their circumstances.

But you can't change someone else. All you can do is criticize or ignore. That's what you see guys here do with respect to others.
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#10

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 05:37 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

Anger is a stage everyone has to go through when processing grief.

Some will get out of that stage, although most will not.

I just started coming out of the anger stage this year. I still have anger deep inside my heart, and it's why I am trying to stay as quiet as possible on here until it fades completely.

I am almost on year 3, and the first 2.5 years were a combination on brutal failure marred by periods of intense psychological pain.

Honestly, I think you have to be insane on some level to reach greater heights. I don't think I would have improved if it wasn't for the fact that I was obsessed with this. I have spent most of my waking moments over the past three years reflecting on who I am, and then obsessing about all the ways I could improve myself. That's probably been about 90% of my thoughts for 3 straight years.

As far as complaining goes, I have always been against it. Mark Minter may have had a poor divorce, but at least he played a conscious part in it. After the divorce, he does nothing to improve his situation.

Where I come from is completely different, I had no conscious choice over what I experienced when I was 8. Yet, I am left with the aftermath of what happened. As much as I would like to complain, the question is, what can I do about it? No one can change the past. Time machines don't exist, so why even dwell on the past. It is over.

Mark made the mistake of living in the past. He could have made the decision to let go of the past, and begin living for himself in the present moment. Instead he took the easy way out, and began venting on the internet.

I feel that this is a fork in the road a lot of people are presented with. The first path is filled with obstacles, struggle, pain, but ultimately leads to a better life. The second has no obstacles, no struggle, and a little bit of pain, but it leads to a dead end. Most people take the second path.
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#11

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 06:09 PM)All or Nothing Wrote:  

Honestly, I think you have to be insane on some level to reach greater heights.

You certainly have to endure Great Pain.

The Great Pain is going to come in one of two ways: from life itself or from imposing it on yourself.

If you put that pain on yourself (think pro athletes who are basically living with arthritis in their 30s), you gotta be crazy.

If you question everything about who you are and the world you live in, you're breaking the "compass" that society has given you and have no direction or sense of where you are.

That is crazy.

Some guys would rather be conformists and remain in polite society. Those people need not experience anger or pain.

Others make a different choice.
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#12

Bitterness in the Manosphere

A thread on bitterness has turned into a embittered finger pointing match.
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#13

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Well I just had some 36 year old fat bitch message me on FB. I have no idea who this girl is. She proceeds to say she lives vicarously through my photos that I post, then asks if I'm back in Vegas.

I'm responding because, I feel like I should be nice even though I have no interest in talking to her.

The this girl proceeds to assume I'm going to meet up with her at some pub crawl she's going to take part in when she comes to visit for a convention, and has the goddamn nerve to ask me if I can control myself "when" I go see her.

I was so insulted I didn't know where to start.

I said

"Let me answer your question with a question"

Do you have model hot looks?

are you under 26?

Then don't worry, you have nothing to worry about when I don't meet you for amateur hour at a fucking pub crawl.

It's hard not to feel resentment towards a culture that finds this acceptable.
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#14

Bitterness in the Manosphere

I don't give enough of a fuck for anything to make me bitter.

@fisto- you're not telling us the whole story.
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#15

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 06:37 PM)Aliblahba Wrote:  

I don't give enough of a fuck for anything to make me bitter.

@fisto- you're not telling us the whole story.

How do you work that out?
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#16

Bitterness in the Manosphere

I have a good feeling about all this. Can the mods please re- evaluate the closing of my meltdown thread.
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#17

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 06:25 PM)Fisto Wrote:  

The this girl proceeds to assume I'm going to meet up with her at some pub crawl she's going to take part in when she comes to visit for a convention, and has the goddamn nerve to ask me if I can control myself "when" I go see her.

Classic, she lifted it right out of the PUA playbook. Assume The Sale.
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#18

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 06:44 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

I have a good feeling about all this. Can the mods please re- evaluate the closing of my meltdown thread.

My Eulogy thread would eclipse your meltdown thread.
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#19

Bitterness in the Manosphere

When are we grabbing a drink? Also, when the fuck are Ali and Mech coming to DC to join? Don't be a cripple fag Ali cmon, let's go.

Vice-Captain - #TeamWaitAndSee
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#20

Bitterness in the Manosphere

I'm going to give you guys some next level life advice.


When's a guy is bitter, he ain't looking for advice, but get's off on bringing others down. He's not at the point of changing. Don't waste your time trying to help him. Instead, agree and amplify. It'll make you feel better. After being stuck 24 hrs a day with miserable dudes, I learned this.

Fisgo: Fuck this shit!
Ali: Sup?
Fisgo: Man, my wife ain't answering her phone for like 8 hours.
Ali: Don't sweat it dude, shit happens. Quit being a fag and hand me those fucking washers fuck face.
Fisgo: The fuck are you talking about?
Ali: Hopefully she ain't like my ex.
Fisgo: What do you mean?
Ali: Man, she stopped answering like that shit so I gave her space. Went home on R&R and she'd fucked three of my friends and was shacked up with the last one.
Fisgo: Fuck you asshole, my wife ain't fuckin' nobody.
Ali: Damn dawg, didn't say she was. Just telling you what happened to me. You tight with your old lady so don't sweat shit. Shut the fuck up and hand me that impact gun.
Fisgo: *festering*

Now the guy is mind fucked and he'll go seek validation somewhere else. Soon as he starts off I cell a guy down the line and give them a heads up. The ball rolls and by the end of the day, dumbass has a complete meltdown.
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#21

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Suck this sAli


2:37pm
Shannon
Can u hang out with girls without any intentions?

2:37pm
Fisgo
of course, why?

2:37pm
Shannon
Because I just want to go have a great time

2:38pm
Fisgo
I see

2:43pm
Shannon
Do u think u can go hang out with me and not want to jump my bones?

2:46pm
Fisgo
I'm not sure I'll have time to hang out at all but I'd say you are safe.

2:46pm
Shannon
Oh I know im safe...

3:25pm
Fisgo
I wouldn't go to a pub crawl in this city because that's shit people do on amateur hour
Regarding the whole "can I control myself" around you question, let me answer that with another question
Are you model level hot?
are you below age 26 (which is still borderline to old for me)

have a special program for olimpians.

3:28pm
Fisgo
I'm not interested, not in hanging out, or buying whatever you're selling.

3:28pm
Shannon
I was joking, u dont have to be rude. I am meeting up with another class mate as well.

3:29pm
Fisgo
I found your question to be insulting
and I've lost my patience
take care
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#22

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 05:36 PM)placer Wrote:  

I do not think a person who holds on to a resentment for too long is a successful person.

Says the guy who had a meltdown because someone didn't like his book! How about you follow your own advice first?

http://mattforney.com/2013/07/23/fake-am...ikes-back/
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#23

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Quote: (07-28-2013 05:44 PM)MikeCF Wrote:  

You have stunk up the room for a long time, bro. (If that is a "personal attack" that earns me a day suspension, so be it.)

No one will get suspended for pointing out hypocrisy or contradiction. Too many fakes posting.
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#24

Bitterness in the Manosphere

Lol at Fisto. That would've pissed me off, too. You were being cool and she couldn't behave with any sense of decency.
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#25

Bitterness in the Manosphere

From my take, there are really two types of guys around these parts. Guys who started off with little to no success with women, then learned the red pill and started banging at will, or guys who had some success with women, enough to get them into serious/semi-serious relationships, and were ultimately burned. Me thinks that those in the former camp my find it harder to understand the bitterness than those in the latter camp, since their interactions with women started off in playerdom vice taking them seriously. I notice this dynamic in guys who lost their virginity to some chick at a party types vs. guys who lost it to girls they dated ('first love') types. So just remember that guys here, even if we agree on the principles of gender dynamics, are coming from different starting points and it thus affects their outlook on things.

Civilize the mind but make savage the body.
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