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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 02:42 PM
I have a girl acquaintance who is short and fat. I always tend to associate fatness with laziness. I was always thinking, why doesn’t she work out a bit? She could be much better looking with just a little effort. This is a reflection of my situation, as when I let go a bit, I get fat fast, but when I work out seriously, I see results and improvements in a few weeks.
Recently I learned that she used to be a professional athlete. Then I’m thinking, how is this possible? If anything, you need to work out super hard and pay attention to what you eat, when being a pro athlete. So the discipline and mentality required just clashed with the current physical display in front of my eyes. I’m trying to think of some sports where you can be a pro and still be overweight. Bowling maybe? No, it turns out it was a sport that involves a lot of running.
What happened? She lived for a few years in the US! So I’m already thinking, this is exactly what I’ve been reading about on this site, that junk food and a culture of driving turns people into fat slobs. Especially women. It’s America’s fault. I have it all figured out.
Wrong again. She was violently mugged during a vacation, here in Europe. Pushed over concrete. Following that event, she was left partly disfigured, and a cripple for months. She had to give up the sports career. I like to think of myself as good at sizing up people fast, but I have to say I was proven wrong in this case. I’m sure most fat people are fat because of lack of self-discipline, but sometimes it’s not the case.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 05:25 PM
I don't know what you are trying to say. All fat people have valid reasons from their view. Some people (1 out of 100) might have a good reason to stay fat. so what? it just doesn't look good in public eyes.
As far as dating goes, I don't care if she deserves to be fat. There is no way I will stay with a human like that.
how about a retarded person from the birth? is it their fault? do you want to be friends with them? how do people look at them in the public even though they are not doing anything wrong?
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 05:35 PM
That is a sad story, but everybody on the forum recognizes that real reasons exist as to obesity without relating to laziness.
It's sad that most fat people use just other's real weight issues to justify their own personal failings.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 05:43 PM
Stereotypes don't exist because they are always right. They exist because they are right more often than random chance.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 06:07 PM
I dated a large woman. (5'5" 135-145). She'd be considered within normal range, possibly even on the thin side today. She's the smartest woman I ever dated, very easygoing (she had to be at her size back in the day) and she was a good cook and masseuse. Lots of creativity, wit and art talent. The thing is, she naturally is large. There's a distribution of weights and she is just big. There was no cellulite or rolls, she was just bigger than what was average back then. Very pretty face and took care of her hair and skin very well. If she wore nice clothes she looked great but she usually wore stuff verging on being hippy. She wore men's pants because they were more comfortable and she didn't give a fuck what anybody thought about it.
Would date her again if she were available.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-17-2013, 06:53 PM
I have seen blind cripples at the gym working out. I admire their attitude more then her fattitude.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-18-2013, 01:06 AM
Quote: (06-17-2013 05:43 PM)MikeCF Wrote:
Stereotypes don't exist because they are always right. They exist because they are right more often than random chance.
We call what MikeCF is referring to a 'categorical fallacy,' and it's the most common type of faulty logical reasoning. To assume a stereotype is always correct is to make the jump from probability to certainty: that, given something is usually true, it always is.
Example:
Premise:
Most American girls are fatty fat fats. A part of me dies every time I write this.
Conclusion:
All American girls mainline bacon grease in between donut feedings and look like God made them in Jabba the Hutt's image.
And yet...
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-18-2013, 01:07 AM
By the way, every other image Google returned for "skinny American girl" returned a picture of a fat chick. Some hedged their bets with Kate Upton.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-18-2013, 07:16 AM
There will always be exceptions. Statistically, they don't really matter. For every one of her, there are 1 million who are fat because they just eat too much and this is no longer an American problem, it's a global problem.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-18-2013, 07:23 AM
Ok she has a reason for her fatness. I think you're conflating her particular experience with the general of all overweight people.
Most people aren't overweight due a mugging. Also she could've continued working out while not training for her sport.
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Don’t be too quick at judging people (sob story of the day!)
06-18-2013, 08:35 AM
This is just an example of poor salesmanship.
The correct way to meet someone is assume 100% honesty. So when you meet someone immediately assume they have been forced into their situation (good or bad). Lay back and let them blab on.
Now you know what they can and cannot add to your life within a 1 hour convo.
Now you can judge them/believe as you wish.
The biggest trick in the world to never being roped is to give someone a sense of trust. They will then in turn give you their life story.