[Dubby]

Hey guys, I just want some input on something. How do you guys talk about stuff that you're ashamed of (or just not really proud of)? Particularly with girls, but it could be with anybody.

Like, for example, if someone asks you "What kind of car do you have?", "What college do/did you go to?", "how much do you make?", and the answer is for example "XYZ Community College, 1984 Buick, and $12K", what do you say?

Of course, someone may recommend "get a different car, or make more money", but that shit takes time, and people are still gonna ask those personal questions in the meantime.

And this doesn't just apply to your alma mater, your ride, or your income, it could be anything.

[nek]

(04-30-2013 06:27 PM)Dubby Wrote:  

Hey guys, I just want some input on something. How do you guys talk about stuff that you're ashamed of (or just not really proud of)? Particularly with girls, but it could be with anybody.

Like, for example, if someone asks you "What kind of car do you have?", "What college do/did you go to?", "how much do you make?", and the answer is for example "XYZ Community College, 1984 Buick, and $12K", what do you say?

Of course, someone may recommend "get a different car, or make more money", but that shit takes time, and people are still gonna ask those personal questions in the meantime.

And this doesn't just apply to your alma mater, your ride, or your income, it could be anything.

Own it. Trying to dance around things in some sort of ego-preservation/image attempt only hurts you, esp. if you eventually get called out on it. We all make mistakes, have flaws. Own them. You went to xyz community college? Say that. All the B.S.ing will get in your way of truly developing. I have flaws and I have confidence because I own them and don't shy away. You did want you did, you own what you own, you are what you are. Trying to dance around it will make you look insecure, and you will be.

[LibertarianBootyHunter]

First of all, Don't talk about it. Give vague answers. Tell the truth. It doesn't really matter.

What matters is, if you are ashamed of it ... work your socks off to change it.

Living in shame harboring the belief that you are inferior or not good enough is a miserable existence that eats on your soul. It is worse than death.

Second, why are you talking ? The worst thing you can do when you are in a shitty situation is think or talk about it too much. The best thing you can do is work so hard that you don't have time to think about it.

As a freshman, I was a chronically depressed guy ... so bad that i took a semester off to " find myself" . Things got worse because i had soo much free time that i kept thinking about my problems & psychological deformities & talking about them to people.

I realized it didn't work. next semester I registered for 21 credits, found a part time job pulling 35 hour weeks including weekends & started lifting.

Magically, all my shame, problems and depression went away. Not because they went away but because I had no time to address them. I had better things to do & over the course of a year .... everything changed.

I was ashamed of my 1990 Mercury Sable but i earned enough money that semester that I bought a used BMW 325 i. I was ashamed of my social awkwardness but the confidence i got from getting good grades & gaining muscle eradicated most of it. I was ashamed of being on academic probation & being a semester behind my friends but caught up after & now I'm graduating Magna Cum Laude.

Women talk about shame and problems. Men do something about it.

Be a man brah !

[Jaylow]

"What kind of car do you have?" <----I drive a space ship / I drive a tricycle, do you even own a vehicle?

"What college do/did you go to?" <---- I took the 4 year course at the International Training Centre for Subway sandwich artist / I failed grade 2, I cant read by the way so your going to have to help me out a lot

"how much do you make?" <---- NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS

Those are the things I would have said.

If things like these always mattered why do welfare hoodrats always get laid? There is more to fucking girls then having a car/education/money.

[Hades]

Write them all down on a list and work to change them. Cross them off as they no longer matter.

[Dubby]

Great advice guys. Inspires me to get my bitch ass in gear.

Quote:

If things like these always mattered why do welfare hoodrats always get laid? There is more to fucking girls then having a car/education/money

Very true.

[WestIndianArchie]

Lots of way to play this, but what I wouldn't do is be vague

If you answer vague, often times she will smell weakness/blood, so she will dig deeper, putting you on the defensive.

You're a man, you should NEVER BE ASHAMED FOR WHO YOU ARE, WHAT YOU WANT, AND WHAT YOU HAVE.

1. matter of fact - 06 black ac, need to change the timing belt, you good with a wrench?

2. lie your ass off - "you know that intersection on Vine and 8th, cot damn uninsured motorist/sorority chick in her suv on her phone/old ass woman taking her husband to the clinic" -

3. playfully lie your ass off
4. accuse her of being a gold digger - jokingly

but in all approaches

5. turn it around -

"damn I was gonna ask you, cause I'm looking for a place to sleep tonight - I need me a Sugar Mama - and you definitely give off that Sugar Mama vibe - I can tell by your choice in purses and shoes."

^that's bait. Once she bites, you can go high or low.

- if you go high - you can just be playful - "I see you're wearing platform heels not real stilettos - that already tells me something about the kind of woman that you think you are and who you want to attract - by going the cute route, you want to attract a 2nd rate dude - cause real chicks wear the most beautiful but painful shoes out there - you want to be comfortable and still attract a baller - I see you, lazy" <- Whiten/Arabicize/Blacken this language up as needed.

- you could go low - shoot for a cold read - "You've really been burned before haven't you. Some dude promised you something and he didn't deliver, so now you got to find out before you get hurt, talk to me - forget all this club/bar bullshit around us - talk to me like a human being"

Situation defused, situation turned around, she's on the defensive, you're getting valuable intel, and probably drawing the chick deeper into your own web of deceit...i mean frame.

If we can agree that game in it's most simplistic form is what to say to a chick to get her to respond the way you want - the key is to get a chick to be on the defensive, to be the one answering questions, volunteering information.

You should download "The Black Philip Show" by Patrice O'Neal. He counsels somebody with a similar question/issue with the concept of Better.

You're better than these bitches, no matter what they have.

WIA