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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-25-2013, 12:55 AM
I have to bring up this rarely-mentioned topic as my first true thread on RVF... living in the city vs. suburbs. This is coming from someone who's spent 1 year in Hong Kong, and another year in Vietnam - the latter which was so densely populated that people are always around you, constant stimulation and you never get a chance to relax. Thankfully, the brain adjusts, and you learn to treat people (girls) as disposable, boosting your game big time. Not to mention 4 years of college campus living.
In my opinion, if I'm living in a suburb like I am right now (i.e. 10+ miles away from downtown) it's "why bother"? Logistics don't work out. It's a pain in the ass to go out. You get into scarcity due to fewer interactions. You have to drive. Roosh is right. Live down the block from the action, and you'll get a lot of action - I can't tell you how many times I leave w/ a girl and cant make anything happen because of logistics. My question to newbies is, how do you deal w/ the fact if you don't live near a nightlife district? Are you just used to it? Will you not bother w/ game until you actually relocate to a city?
/disgruntledfor8+months
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-25-2013, 09:16 AM
I had this problem for a long time too, even worse because I'm with my parents. Then I got a wingman late last year who lived in the middle of the city with multiple clubs and bars within a 5 minute walk, which is something you should try and find. I thought I struck gold but he was a massive bitch about bring girls over. Fucked me over multiple times in the last three months. My living situation wrecked my motivation to approach. I would've been going at it like an approach monkey if I lived where the action is, instead I've been a "weekend warrior" of sorts.
The good news though is that I'm moving into the city next month with my wingmen, even though affording it will be precarious since we're still in university. I've done the math a million ways to Sunday, if you work full time and get roommates (maybe convert the living room into an extra bedroom to reduce your share of the rent) it should be doable to get good logistics depending on which city you live.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-25-2013, 11:58 AM
At least here in the US, there's a sizable number of 20 somethings living with their parents again in the burbs after either being unemployed or underemployed after college, due to the great recession's effect, and this includes girls who don't get down into the city much as a result.
Have you tried online dating? I see plenty of somewhat okay girls in the burbs (quality is usually lower) on OkC outside my city. I know a guy also in the burbs in this situation and it's far more acceptable to suggest a 1st interaction ("date") at either one of your houses ("watch a movie tomorrow with me.") than it would be if you were in the city near the action.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-28-2013, 01:37 AM
P Dog hope things work out for ya
Unfortunately I too live w/ my parents at the moment (that will be definitely changing in the summer) so even online dating is out of the question. i've never joined a site, not necessarily against it, but feel that if i don't have my own place it's no different from high school.
I guess i've just been spoiled by living abroad so much; I know a guy who lives 25 miles from Chicago and still drives in and makes the attempt just because thats his mentality. Mainly i want to know the opinion of this board
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-29-2013, 03:49 PM
Are there no venues near your living quarters? I live considerably further from the city (45 min to NYC), but we have bars all over the place. Another thing I did was take the back seats out of my minivan and put a huge air mattress in their place. When logistics don't work, bring your own!
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-29-2013, 04:04 PM
There is simply no substitute for good logistics when running traditional night game. It's like fighting with one arm tied behind your back. No matter how well you warm a girl up, there's a very high chance you'll fail to convert at the end of the night if you're burdened with terrible logistical hurdles.
If you're trapped in the suburbs I would recommend switching to "date game" - a combination of using day game and online game to set up dates, rather than trying to rely on meeting girls with night game. Run day game during the weekend at malls, grocery stores, outdoor markets, etc... and supplement with online game during the week. This should be enough to get you at least one date with a solid prospect every week. Do your homework and identify the best date spots/bars around your area to maximize your conversion rate on your dates.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
03-29-2013, 04:34 PM
OP, you're just making excuses. How often in life do you get the ideal situation in any endeavor?
Find workarounds and make it happen.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
04-07-2013, 11:13 PM
This is going to be my situation for the next few months I plan to overcome the obstacles of bad logistics (4 bars in the whole town that close at 12-1, shitty party scene, no car etc):
- I can't work well in the house so I'm going to bike to some coffee shops/strip malls in the area. Shouldn't take more than 15 minutes. I'm going to pick one by yoga studios, shopping malls etc. and get a feel for when they're the busiest with hot girls. ie. after a yoga class a hottie might come and get an iced coffee. I'll be waiting there ready to strike. There's probably 5-7 good locations near me so I can have one for each day of the week.
- go to the mall at odd hours and flirt with the girls working there. You never see it happen and they're usually the cutest there.
- go to the university library for some standard daygame.
- rebuild a social circle that is female heavy. party with them, take them out for dates, bang a few and create drama and jealousy within the social circle (one of my friends already does this and has banged half the chicks or more in the social circle).
- my gym pass will have unlimited access to fitness classes. I'll go to as many as I can.
- flirt with cashiers at various stores within biking distance of my house.
There are two themes that run through this:
- kill 2 birds with one stone. inconvenience yourself slightly, but increase your time out and about to interact with women. I'll be working on my goal of cutting to the weight class below me while still being able to hit on yoga chicks when I take a yoga class.
- long game. I'll be logistically unfavourable for me to have ONS (unless I go to her place). I'll be frequenting many places while building familiarity within the community (again relates to point 1).
Online dating might be good if you can screen for location. I've checked out where I'm going to live and theres 50 girls who have been online in the past year. Not exactly the best place to look.
I should be able to set up the following rotation while I'm living in the suburbs (provided I'm not a lazy bastard and stay inside all day playing videogames):
1 girl I bang at parties
1 quality girlfriend (maybe I'll do some church game for this one)
1 fuck buddy (probably one I'll see weekly).
I'm assuming your suburbia will be like mine and will be a small town. If you have a rotation within certain social circles you'll avoid getting a bad reputation as a player. Lets say the party girl drops out. Start banging another girl in that social circle. The time period will be enough to give you a successful with women rep rather than a player rep.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-17-2013, 06:19 PM
Suburbs suck - their whole existence is based on 1950s 1960s and 1970s racism - "white flight".
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-17-2013, 06:48 PM
Yep, I'll pay an extra $200-300 a month to live in town. That 2-300 a month is pretty much spent on gas anyways if you live far away. Shit, you can even just get rid of your car and save yourself the money for the payment, insurance, and gas if you live in the right place.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-19-2013, 07:48 PM
Move.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-26-2013, 02:37 PM
I used to live in the suburbs and honestly did not find it too hard to bang. Being outgoing and gaming girls has more of an impact because theyre used to a more ho hum life where everything is always the same. Same restaurant same mall same friends same bar. Someone new and exciting has more value in that case.
It sounds like youre recebtly out of college like I was when living in the burbs. Make the most of it. I met girls in coffee shops, on the street, at parks, on the train coming back from the city, etc.
Dates are more of a necessity, but thats good, cause you set up the date so the logistics are just what you need. I lived in a suburban housing development that had a "clubhouse" w a pool room in it. I would tell girls we were going to play pool there at night. It was always on when we were alone there. Wonder how many other sheisty dudes pulled the same move there...
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-26-2013, 02:43 PM
Banging in your car is another perk.
Try to find out where foreign girls in your town hang out. Is there a type of restaurant that they flock to? A bar? Do you have any umiversities near you? Try getting deeper into the suburbs to meet some immigrant chicks living in cheaper areas. Lots of suburban communities further out that are overwhelmingly Latino where chicks would be tickled pink to meet a gringo and break up lo mismo de siempre
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-27-2013, 11:04 PM
Or have a girl meet you at your pad, and then drive from there. Drink soda-water bitters (looks like alcohol) and smoke Js/cigarettes.
When new girls are coming to your pad, " tell them I live w/other people. Don't make a lot of noise." ( no need to bring un-necessary info into it). Cheers.
Swoop away young player.
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Living in the suburbs - how do you deal with it?
05-29-2013, 12:11 AM
Quote: (05-20-2013 10:09 PM)BarkChompson Wrote:
Quote: (05-19-2013 04:23 PM)Cyclone Wrote:
That's what I'm doing. I'm moving to Singapore in less than 2 months.
Sweet. Is that the really rich place where they throw you in jail for littering or something?
I was in Singapore two weeks ago. Was drinking with one Singapore native, one Filipina, and this American guy. I was saying how nice Singapore was.
The American guy, who had been working there for two years, went into a long rant about how he hated the place, how soulless it was, how his friend was in jail for a dispute with a cab driver.
There was a newspaper story with pictures of a white guy with a bloody nose who was charged with indecent assault on a local woman at Clarke Quay - he got beat up by a couple of local guys being white knights.
Environmentally very nice, but expensive and maybe a tough place to pick up women. Of course you can take the ferry to Batam or causeway to JB and probably have a better time in either place. It would definitely be worth living there if you had a job.
