[speakeasy]

What do you guys think about having platonic female friends? And I mean good friends, not just girls you'd use for social proof or to try and bang her friends. Is that something you do?

Do you guys have a lot of female friends too or is this a situation you try to avoid? I like having both myself.

[Rocco81]

Hmmm I have a few, but to be honest unless I'm banging a girl or her friends they usually just annoy me.

I do think its possible to have that platonic relationship, but to me it's hard to have that real solid friend as a girl. At some point they end up wanting you to listen a little too long or comment a little too much on something in their life and for me that shit is boring.

Friend girls are amazing though, the one in 100 girls that is just cool as hell, is def. a good thing to have around.

[beebopaloo]

Agreeing with Rocco81.
main reason it doesn't work is that either you like them too much or, what happends more often, they like you too much.
Or you bang their friends and they start to act weird.

[Mrs. Chocolate]

I know that is not much related to the post, but I have a friend (since High School) and we are a group of 6, and he is the only man. He saw us on pijamas with facial treatments, talking about men (in a very intimate way) and nothing.
Now he lives in another city and when I'm post a scrap in his orkut there are only girls posting and in his photos (some are okay, others cute)... he is surrounded by girls, and I never seen him dating none of them.
Gay? I don't know! and I know a lot of gays. Beta dude? Shy, yes a little, although after he is living in SC he is more talkative and entretainer than before.

[speakeasy]

I actually know some pretty cool girls that are active and like to do things. Like go on hikes, photography excursions, to the beach, camping trips and shit like that. I really only know one dude anymore that's down for outdoorsy stuff which I like to do. Most of them are single so I guess whenever they get hitched, they'll drop out the scene. Just seems like I know a lot of dudes that just don't do too much anymore.

[hydrogonian]

My experience is that if you don't like them enough to chase, and still want to be around her because you guys click, then you will be in the exact mind-frame that will cause her to start to like you a lot. Usually in man-woman buddy relationships, someone secretly likes the other person. Eventually, this affects the relationship.

The only women that I've been able to maintain legitimate friendships with, with maybe one exception, are the girlfriends and wives of my friends. That dynamic is great for making girl-buddies.

[speakeasy]

(06-01-2010 08:34 PM)hydrogonian Wrote:  

My experience is that if you don't like them enough to chase, and still want to be around her because you guys click, then you will be in the exact mind-frame that will cause her to start to like you a lot. Usually in man-woman buddy relationships, someone secretly likes the other person.

Or we just may not be each others physical type so attraction doesn't develop.

[hydrogonian]

(06-01-2010 08:49 PM)speakeasy Wrote:  

Or we just may not be each others physical type so attraction doesn't develop.

That can happen to. But physical appearance is a lot less important for women. Unless your physical appearance is sub-par, if your behavior is right, she might start to like you over time. But, yeah, there are lots of man/woman friend pairs who aren't physically attracted to one another.
However, if two unattractive people are friends, what are their other options?...lol

[AlphaQup2nite]

I know lots of chicks as friends who im not really interested in banging, for various reasons. They are all hot, but for some reason something about them just doesn't really click. I mean i wouldn't turn down a drunken hook up or something like that, but other then that not really interested in the time or the effort involved.

On the plus side, having female friends who like to hang around you is always nice, since chicks draw more chicks and have hot friends.

[Aylar]

I;m a girl and I have to agree with rocco 81. all of the long term guy friend ive had that i've never been involved with and i wasnt interested in , i know liked me. And if i ever had a good guy friend that I liked, we ended up dating.

[manilaguy]

I am going through a situation right now where I befriended a Colombian girl (here states side) to practice my Spanish in preparation for my coming SA trip but she is getting attached, so now I have to bail out on some good free lessons.

I do not think being friends with a girl works, even if is based on good intentions.

[Biz]

I think the only real female friends I have are girls that I befriended trying to get with and failing then became friends afterwards...or ex hook ups

[Quasi]

I cant have female friends.. I do try.. with my salsa partner, which I saw most summer and did sleep with, but now I just want to be friends for the dancing and I also have some internet female friends I have´nt seen and banged, but its superficial and Im not good at it, always seems that sex gets involved..

My ex contacted me like 1½ months ago wanting to be friends.. I didnt respond.. Its just not me.. besides she wants something else.. which is really also the case with most male/females friendship in my life..


But its fine for what it is..

[kerouac]

I have a couple of good female friends and they are both past hookups, but it works out because we basically liked each others personalities but didn't see any long term relationship potential so we just hooked up.

I think girls like this are great because they have a different "essence" to them than guy friends.

For me at least, hanging out with girl friends gives me a warmth that many of my guy friends don't really have. This is especially true with my American friends. I can easily hang out with guy friends who aren't Americans and still receive this "warmth" but with my American friends this warm quality is lost. My American guy friends are all competitive and don't really try to look out for each other's interests (Short Term Thinking), whereas my international friends all seem to have this natural understanding of Bros before Hoes. American guys talk about Bros Before Hoes philosophically but don't engage it enough, whereas for guys around the world this is the standard.

Anyway back to the point. I personally like my female friends and our mutual understanding that we are not meant for each other relationship wise makes our friendship easier to maintain.

*edit: I should say that I'm in California and people aren't as warm with each other here as, let's say, the east coast. California has a pretty PC attitude and people can be pretty uptight, so when I say Americans, I refer mostly to Californians.