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Abandoning a girl
#1

Abandoning a girl

Suppose I'm in a party with a pretty girl I like, she's friendly and the conversation is going great. Now I have two options:
1) stay with the girl for as long as possible, maybe till the very end, and then try to bring her home
2) wind down the conversation and tell her that I'll meet her later on.

Neither of these options worked for me. The times when I focused on one single girl (i) I missed the chance to see other girls; (ii) it probably comes across as needy. I'm almost certain to get a number close, but they don't even consider the possibility of a future date.
I also tried abandoning her before she abandons me (her friends miss her, she has classes tomorrow, etc.). Sometimes they would get visibly sad about it, but they never came looking for me themselves. When I tried to strike up a conversation again, they were reluctant to interact further, probably because I came across as a player talking to many girls. On the other hand, the douche who approached her after I left got lucky, because the girl was eager to show me that she can find another guy and she doesn't give a shit about me.
Maybe the best strategy is to become that second douche...
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#2

Abandoning a girl

Neediness is mentality, not what you do. If you come from scarcity and keep thinking how to get the girl, you'll subcommunicate lower value through your actions.

Quote: (02-15-2013 07:34 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

Neither of these options worked for me. The times when I focused on one single girl (i) I missed the chance to see other girls; (ii) it probably comes across as needy. I'm almost certain to get a number close, but they don't even consider the possibility of a future date.
I also tried abandoning her before she abandons me (her friends miss her, she has classes tomorrow, etc.). Sometimes they would get visibly sad about it, but they never came looking for me themselves. When I tried to strike up a conversation again, they were reluctant to interact further, probably because I came across as a player talking to many girls. On the other hand, the douche who approached her after I left got lucky, because the girl was eager to show me that she can find another guy and she doesn't give a shit about me.
Maybe the best strategy is to become that second douche...

My gut feeling is that you're trying to game the girls too hard instead of building a real connection. That's also why your numbers flake. And what's with the negativity, if a girl really liked you, why would she want to show she doesn't give a shit about you lol
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#3

Abandoning a girl

I think I might be having something like an exact opposite of neediness... Girls are so plentiful and it's so easy to approach them and chat that I have to force myself to be excited about it. Especially if she's a 5 or 6, I think they feel that I'm taking the interaction half-assed and I honestly and sincerely don't value them.
On the other hand, when I'm on an emotional high, like yesterday, I was cracking jokes to 3 girls, then a 4th one joined, I totally eclipsed two other dudes standing there like complete morons. I had so much fun being a stand-up comedian, I genuinely don't even mind that I didn't get the bang.
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#4

Abandoning a girl

Quote: (02-15-2013 07:55 AM)reino341 Wrote:  

My gut feeling is that you're trying to game the girls too hard instead of building a real connection. That's also why your numbers flake.
This is very true. I have trouble building a real connection, because most of the girls are stupid and shallow in my opinion. The majority of them I would pump and dump, if I could.

Quote: (02-15-2013 07:55 AM)reino341 Wrote:  

And what's with the negativity, if a girl really liked you, why would she want to show she doesn't give a shit about you lol
well I suppose she liked me at first, but then she realized I'm not too much into her, so she lost interest, especially when she found other options
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#5

Abandoning a girl

Quote: (02-15-2013 07:34 AM)alphanov Wrote:  

Suppose I'm in a party with a pretty girl I like, she's friendly and the conversation is going great.

I used to face this dilemma myself.
Get to the venue @ 10:30. Meet a cool chick @ 11:30. Most people aren't going to think about leaving until 1, if not 2. (clubs close @ 2 in most of the US of A. NY is 4)

Stay by her side until last call?
Play the field a bit...but possibly lose the lay?

If the vibe is right, BOUNCE EARLY. Which means you always need a bounce location. But if you take the game seriously, you already have your logistics down pat.

Start @ the Bar and then bounce to the park/late nite eatery/ice cream whatever vibe you want to put off.

Then bounce home, or forget you need to feed your pet marmoset, or show her that REALLY AWESOME THING I'VE BEEN HINTING ABOUT ALL NIGHT. Yeah, I've got a signed poster from Neil Tyson DeGrasse, it's the bee's knees.

Mys or Lovedrop lays this out in his book I believe.

WIA
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#6

Abandoning a girl

Just stay with her if the vibe goes on. Some time ago starting with the game I was talking to one Bielorussian girl and make de huge mistake of leaving her and looking for other chicks. She noticed that and even when I get the phone number when I contact her I couldn't even close a date.

Of course it could happen that you talk with a girl all the time and at the end she tell you that has a boyfriend, happenned to me with one Latvian girl, didn't see it coming and couldn't react like a real player, letting her go while I could get something, (boyfriend still living in Latvia).

Like we say in Spain, "Más vale pájaro en mano que ciento volando"
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