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Can I get a hug?
#1

Can I get a hug?

Have any of you guys ever used this? It's my number one opener lately. Soon as a good-looking girl makes eye contact with me, I either reach out and take her hand to pull her over or walk up and ask if I can get a hug or simply say "I do hugs." From there just slip into typical conversation.

It sounds wierd but it's been getting me really good results lately. And it's instant physical contact that you can leverage from the get-go. One girl was on her way out the door but stuck around for a chat and then she initiated a kiss when it was time for her to leave. Texted me that she wants me to come down to the city and crash at her house so we can get to know each other better. Somehow don't think it would have escalated so easily without that immediate touching.

You can also tell a lot about the girl and whether or not she's down by how she hugs you.

I think you have to have some real natural sexual energy to pull this off without creeping people out though.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#2

Can I get a hug?

Quote: (10-19-2012 06:32 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Have any of you guys ever used this? It's my number one opener lately. Soon as a good-looking girl makes eye contact with me, I either reach out and take her hand to pull her over or walk up and ask if I can get a hug or simply say "I do hugs." From there just slip into typical conversation.

It sounds wierd but it's been getting me really good results lately. And it's instant physical contact that you can leverage from the get-go. One girl was on her way out the door but stuck around for a chat and then she initiated a kiss when it was time for her to leave. Texted me that she wants me to come down to the city and crash at her house so we can get to know each other better. Somehow don't think it would have escalated so easily without that immediate touching.

You can also tell a lot about the girl and whether or not she's down by how she hugs you.

I think you have to have some real natural sexual energy to pull this off without creeping people out though.

What context do you use this in? I can only imagine it working in house parties or on a more laid-back campus.
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#3

Can I get a hug?

Quote: (10-20-2012 02:48 AM)Thomas the Rhymer Wrote:  

Quote: (10-19-2012 06:32 PM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Have any of you guys ever used this? It's my number one opener lately. Soon as a good-looking girl makes eye contact with me, I either reach out and take her hand to pull her over or walk up and ask if I can get a hug or simply say "I do hugs." From there just slip into typical conversation.

It sounds wierd but it's been getting me really good results lately. And it's instant physical contact that you can leverage from the get-go. One girl was on her way out the door but stuck around for a chat and then she initiated a kiss when it was time for her to leave. Texted me that she wants me to come down to the city and crash at her house so we can get to know each other better. Somehow don't think it would have escalated so easily without that immediate touching.

You can also tell a lot about the girl and whether or not she's down by how she hugs you.

I think you have to have some real natural sexual energy to pull this off without creeping people out though.

What context do you use this in? I can only imagine it working in house parties or on a more laid-back campus.

bars

Edit: To clarify though, I'm one of those people who seems to get away with saying or doing just about anything when in the flow. Especially if I'm drinking. It's all in delivery. I could see this approach to be a major fail for the wrong person.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#4

Can I get a hug?

it's not weird. it's very good fun and playful way to set the tone right. i like it
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#5

Can I get a hug?

I'll have to agree that this is golden whenever you give off a fun, friendly vibe to a girl.
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#6

Can I get a hug?

You can also offer free hugs which is cool to get over daygame inertia.

You often get an good open response which can help you move past AA and inner resistance.

I've found most girls will accept it, except the very hot ones.

If you look at videos of Tyler Durden, he just goes up and tells girls they know how to party and goes into long hugs!
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#7

Can I get a hug?

Hugs are only going to work for a guy in the right environment. If you are a skeevy looking old dude trying to fit in at a college bar, it's not going to work. Hipster in a wine bar? If you're decent looking, goofy/playful, it can.

Vice-Captain - #TeamWaitAndSee
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#8

Can I get a hug?

Personally I've never used this on a girl I haven't already established some comfort with over at least a few days. That way it doesn't seem weird some random guy is trying to hug her. Also what I do is instead of asking for her permission to hug her, I walk up to her and when there's about a foot or two of distance between us I slowly outstretch my arms and hug her. Simple as that. Normally there will be no resistance if there was some comfort built beforehand but if there is so what. It's not an exact strategy depending on the scenario, like gmac stated, but if you can the hug good for you.
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#9

Can I get a hug?

Quote:Beyond Borders Wrote:

it's been getting me really good results lately.

Are any of these good results lays? Even with the right environment and looks, you'd need just the right vibe. Though I like the idea of going up the kino ladder fast. It sets the trend for rest of the interaction. I'll keep this opener handy for when it fits my mood.
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#10

Can I get a hug?

I've never asked but I do just hug random girls alot. You open up your arms wide and go for the hug and gauge by her body language if she's going to like it. Make sure you smell good. Girls/humans in general love that shit. Everyone loves to be held. Infants will die if they're not held. Its a primal thing. And it takes balls to do which will gain you points. Whenever I do this in front of a dude who doesn't know me well they always say the same thing, "he knows her." Or ,"he's met her before."
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#11

Can I get a hug?

It works.

When you're about to part ways with a chick, say "Damn.. I can't even get a goodbye hug? That's fucked up."

When she pulls in for the hug, say "You might as well give me a kiss on the cheek too."

All you have to do is say it with a straight look on your face. She'll laugh.
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#12

Can I get a hug?

Yeah than go for the other cheek than go for the lips. Than pull her pants down.
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#13

Can I get a hug?

Met with Beyond Border earlier, he's a very cool guy, who strikes me as having good natural game, I can definitely see this approach working for him. You've got to have the right vibe and be congruent, or else you might come off as kind of awkward, needy, "creepy", or whatever. However if done right, it puts you into the right state, you've initiated kino and built rapport and hooked them into a conversation, it also makes it that much easier to escalate kino since it's already been established. This technique will obviously be best for girls that have been giving you strong eye-contact or other IOIs, as it could be kind of weird just asking random girls for hugs. If you got a fun, playful vibe, this can work out really well, I may have to try it out on the next chick giving me the eye.

P.S.

Good chilling with you bro, sorry again if I kind of stifled things with the cute blondies, definitely wasn't on my best game.
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#14

Can I get a hug?

I don't open with it, but I use it before ending a conversation a lot, it works well with younger girls with that playful vibe. I've yet to be turned down. Common line of "Aww, no hug?" with a sad puppy face works.
I have no idea how it translates into escalation, never actually thought bout it. But having new tits against my chest always makes my day a tiny bit brighter, and gives me incentive to follow up. [Image: banana.gif]
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#15

Can I get a hug?

Quote: (10-20-2012 02:33 PM)TXH Wrote:  

Quote:Beyond Borders Wrote:

it's been getting me really good results lately.

Are any of these good results lays? Even with the right environment and looks, you'd need just the right vibe. Though I like the idea of going up the kino ladder fast. It sets the trend for rest of the interaction. I'll keep this opener handy for when it fits my mood.

This is a really fair question.

The answer is no, but in my own defense, I have the worst logistics on the planet right now. I currently live two hours from any real town (real town being 30,000 people) and barely ever make it out anywhere - when I am in town I'm pretty in and out and have nowhere to pull women to (not that I can't go to their place but bear with me). Not to mention that between spending 5 years gaming women who don't speak English and this last summer isolated in the mountains means my game has dwindled a lot. I'm just now getting back out with these American broads so the other aspects of my game are still a bit rusty.

All that said, I have a very intuitive sense with women and have slept with over 100 on natural game alone. So I know when something is working.

My point on this is that it works great as an approach. An approach can work amazingly well but that still doesn't gaurantee a lay. Ever.

Keeping that in mind, I still can't overemphasize how well this approach is building sexual energy right from the get-go when done right. Here's another example from last night.

I came really close to pulling this girl in a doughnut shop at about 3:30 in the morning with it. I'm standing next to the line having got my order and see her looking at me. Pull my "hug game" (I'm starting to call it haha). Next thing you know we're having a conversation with our faces inches apart - total sexual energy switched on. Half of the conversation consists of me eating my doughnuts and looking in her eyes with a confident, suggestive smirk on my face and her trying to make sense of me. She tells me I'm intriguing. Next thing you know she's talking about her bed and we're discussing me going back to it with her.

I suddenly realize she is completely sober and I've been drinking and smoking cigars since about 2:30 pm. I get self-conscious, mostly about my breath, and hesitate. Spooked the cat. She excuses herself and gets out of there before I can think how to recover.

Most approaches I pull in doughnut shops (lol) simply don't get this intense this quickly - this all went down in a matter of minutes. Hug game. For the right type of guy, it has potential. That's all I'm saying...

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#16

Can I get a hug?

Quote: (10-20-2012 09:47 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:  

Met with Beyond Border earlier, he's a very cool guy, who strikes me as having good natural game, I can definitely see this approach working for him. You've got to have the right vibe and be congruent, or else you might come off as kind of awkward, needy, "creepy", or whatever. However if done right, it puts you into the right state, you've initiated kino and built rapport and hooked them into a conversation, it also makes it that much easier to escalate kino since it's already been established. This technique will obviously be best for girls that have been giving you strong eye-contact or other IOIs, as it could be kind of weird just asking random girls for hugs. If you got a fun, playful vibe, this can work out really well, I may have to try it out on the next chick giving me the eye.

P.S.

Good chilling with you bro, sorry again if I kind of stifled things with the cute blondies, definitely wasn't on my best game.

I had a good time meeting you too, Man. Damn did I get buzzed up last night though. lol I ended up losing my 5 ghetto-fabs because they wanted to go to Eureka and I didn't want to leave the truck. So I got out and walked up to the doughnut shop (see above) and eventually ended up sleeping in my truck. Better than driving drunk, I suppose, but damn was it cold.

Vibe was pretty weird at that spot we were at. To be honest, it really seems like the majority of the girls are all about the brothers there, which has always been a common thing in this neck of the woods at certain spots. I think the bars down the block might suit our style a little better, though that little spot in Etown is definitely showing most potential up here for now.

Even better, we should plan an out of town trip one of these days.

Will definitely hit you up again soon after I get moved out of my house and am up here more.

Don't worry about those blondies from earlier in the day at all. Things were a bit forced anyways with the pressure to "perform" in front of a forum member first time meeting and all, and forced is just not my style. I feel that could have played out a little more naturally if we knew each other better and weren't struggling to explain how we'd met, etc. Was as much my fail as yours, Bro.

But there are plenty more blondies to go around... [Image: biggrin.gif]

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#17

Can I get a hug?

Beyond Borders, I was wondering why your try such a strange opener without any fear of burning through the women of your isolated village. Then I read the part about your experience, and I remembered Krauser's "secure attachment pug":
[Image: 28774924.jpg]

Quote:Quote:

I still can't overemphasize how well this approach is building sexual energy right from the get-go when done right.

Sounds like a worthwhile experiment then. I'll check back about this.
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#18

Can I get a hug?

Quote: (10-22-2012 06:46 AM)TXH Wrote:  

Beyond Borders, I was wondering why your try such a strange opener without any fear of burning through the women of your isolated village. Then I read the part about your experience, and I remembered Krauser's "secure attachment pug":
[Image: 28774924.jpg]

Quote:Quote:

I still can't overemphasize how well this approach is building sexual energy right from the get-go when done right.

Sounds like a worthwhile experiment then. I'll check back about this.

lol good one

To clear a couple things up, I've only had the "worst logistics in the world" since the beginning of summer and am not planning to stick around much longer. So not too worried about burning through the talent at all. The only way I could ever see myself building a year-round, permanent life here is if I was a family man. Not happening any time soon - maybe around 40 - and at that point I wouldn't be worried about my rep anyways because I'd have something locked down.

When I go out it's all about having a blast and being fun. I don't mind coming across as outrageous at all because it's just who I am - anyone who knows me personally has accepted this about me and gets a kick out of it. Sometimes when I'm not really in that pumped up mood because I'm tired I don't have much fun on the town I wouldn't try something like this and if I did I would probably fail (really shouldn't go out on these nights anyways).

But when I'm switched on I'm switched on.

And I thrive on that point where you meet someone randomly and there's that intense moment of attraction even with no real basis for it. Have you ever noticed how two women can be about the same in the looks department but one just makes you feel alive and there's this intense energy between you - complete natural attraction from the get-go? Sometimes one is obviously hotter and more desirable but there's just no spark.

(Flirting a lot of times seems to be like playing around with the spark to see if it's real or imagined. The more sexually charged, the more fun and easy the flirting. If it fizzles out or seems forced at that point, I personally just lose interest.)

To me these natural dynamics have a lot to do with compatibility (physical, chemical, and spiritual not necessarily personality-wise), hormones, and shit like that - there are just some women you have a natural connection with, sexual or otherwise. And the weird thing is you can feel that energy as soon as you meet them or even just look at them, like it's buzzing in the air.

Those women are the ones you'll have the best sex with, in my experience. They're also the ones you'll most likely have a dysfunctional relationship with if it goes beyond a one-night stand but that's neither here nor there. [Image: smile.gif]

This dynamic is also the reason some women in the bar catch eye contact with you and others don't - I remember reading somewhere that if a woman meets your eyes and doesn't look away for a moment or, even better, makes eye contact then looks away and then makes eye contact again, you'd be a maniac to not go talk to her. Women are constantly avoiding prolonged or repeated eye contact with men they're not drawn to (the last thing they want is another schmuck hitting on them), and so when it happens, it almost always means there's an attraction.

In my opinion, that's not just her appreciation of how you look physically. It's sexual compatability speaking. She's one of those women you've got that energy with, and it's the perfect moment to just reach out and grab her hand or give her a hug if you're outlandish enough to try it. In such a context, is it any wonder that she'd get caught up in the moment? She's just as sexually switched on as you and you showed the personal power to recognize and capitalize...

Enjoy your experiment.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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