[Beyond Borders]

Earlier tonight some girl in a text message tried to tell me I had just scored points by something I said. What?! I'm not here to impress you. I sent one back saying "I'm not on the point system lady."

Her next message was an apology and a promise never to say something like that again. And an explanation.

I think she got the message. We've got a "brunch" date in the morning.

Points? Give me a break.

Just a reminder to anyone else who puts up with that shit that it's a ridiculous power grab IMHO. Presented as a compliment but I'm not buying it. What I'm wooing you for marriage? Don't think so...

Save your points for the other guy.

[storm]

Ha. I think Mystery pushed the points system. I wonder who she learned it from...

[Prophylaxis]

"Awesome. How many more points do I need for anal?"

[Belize King]

Ha. I sometimes put lizards on a point system. If they hit 5 points they get to see something nice. They like that shit. Gives them a goal and distracts their little hamster minds haha.

[adubz]

Can't points be something else you can use to make your chances easier? I think you can even use it against her in a sort of mocking fashion. If you're creative enough, something as mundane as a "point system" could be worked. However, I can see how it would be really annoying, and would want to be ignored altogether.

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Ironically, it is ridiculous when women try it, but light use of the so-called "points system" can help you if you're a man trying to attract a woman. Stuff like "you haven't seen (movie XYZ)? Minus billion points!") So this is classic female solipsism.

[Snowflake]

Love the idea of reverse-point system, I'm guessing it gets the hamster in overdrive

[Spike]

(10-07-2012 04:17 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Earlier tonight some girl in a text message tried to tell me I had just scored points by something I said. What?! I'm not here to impress you. I sent one back saying "I'm not on the point system lady."

Her next message was an apology and a promise never to say something like that again. And an explanation.

I think she got the message. We've got a "brunch" date in the morning.

Points? Give me a break.

Just a reminder to anyone else who puts up with that shit that it's a ridiculous power grab IMHO. Presented as a compliment but I'm not buying it. What I'm wooing you for marriage? Don't think so...

Save your points for the other guy.

Well done!

[Samseau]

Yep. Always reframe demaning words. I had a girl call me a "hookup". I said to her, "I don't do hookups." I paused for effect. Then I said, "I can't believe you called me a hookup. That's fucking insulting." She started to apologize and I banged her again later that week.

[MrXY]

It really angers me when a girl tells me I have gained or lost "points" with her

It's her attempt to take the superior position as the one who can give or withhold approval.

Just as the OP did, I let her know in no uncertain terms that it won't fly with me.

[BlurredSevens]

Ok so this is an honest question: what's the big deal with this kind of thing? A girl pulled the "points" comment on me last night on the walk back to her place. It was in a playful way, she was complimenting me because we had a fun night on the town drinking and dancing. I laughed it off, and half an hour later we were banging. She texted me today, wants to go out again.

I guess this is an area of game I am struggling to understand: what would I have gained by reframing the conversation and telling her "I don't do points"? Again, this is not a rhetorical question, I am trying to see both sides of the coin here.

[Samseau]

(10-07-2012 09:24 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

Ok so this is an honest question: what's the big deal with this kind of thing? A girl pulled the "points" comment on me last night on the walk back to her place. It was in a playful way, she was complimenting me because we had a fun night on the town drinking and dancing. I laughed it off, and half an hour later we were banging. She texted me today, wants to go out again.

I guess this is an area of game I am struggling to understand: what would I have gained by reframing the conversation and telling her "I don't do points"? Again, this is not a rhetorical question, I am trying to see both sides of the coin here.

You need to judge: Is she being insulting, or just playful?

[adubz]

(10-07-2012 09:24 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

Ok so this is an honest question: what's the big deal with this kind of thing? A girl pulled the "points" comment on me last night on the walk back to her place. It was in a playful way, she was complimenting me because we had a fun night on the town drinking and dancing. I laughed it off, and half an hour later we were banging. She texted me today, wants to go out again.

I guess this is an area of game I am struggling to understand: what would I have gained by reframing the conversation and telling her "I don't do points"? Again, this is not a rhetorical question, I am trying to see both sides of the coin here.

Again, I feel it mostly depends on you. Even if you don't like it, if you're creative enough you can use it against her.

[Hotwheels]

I use the points thing on broads all the time. Don't recall the ever trying it on me.

Probably because the one giving points is working from a position of power and I don't let them get in that position.

[RichieP]

If it was just about testing you for your alphaness/confidence, that's cool. These days it seems to have gone beyond that with alot of girls, to the point that it's a turnoff sometimes

Someone explained the "why" of it well in another post - it's like, they somehow wrongly connect being sassy and power-grabby with being desirable. Like they watch too much Sex and the City, they see "empowered" women with eligible men chasing after them every episode and their brains go "aha! that's how I become desired"

It's fair enough for them to test your confidence and see how you handle things. But alot of girls take it beyond that. I think if they stopped believing the deranged relationship dynamics of all the shows they watch and realised how most men actually feel in response to it - i.e. turned off and thinking "uggh, yuuuck" - they would behave a lil different. Calling them out on it is like a little shot of antidote to the delusional ideas about dating that they get from TV shows.

[Beyond Borders]

(10-07-2012 09:24 PM)BlurredSevens Wrote:  

Ok so this is an honest question: what's the big deal with this kind of thing? A girl pulled the "points" comment on me last night on the walk back to her place. It was in a playful way, she was complimenting me because we had a fun night on the town drinking and dancing. I laughed it off, and half an hour later we were banging. She texted me today, wants to go out again.

I guess this is an area of game I am struggling to understand: what would I have gained by reframing the conversation and telling her "I don't do points"? Again, this is not a rhetorical question, I am trying to see both sides of the coin here.

Fair enough.

For me it was really about setting the standard. I didn't take it so much as an insult as her trying to frame our "relationship" in a certain way.

Offering points to me for the thing I said indicated three things:

1) I had possibly mentioned the thing to get her favor.
2) She was evaluating me rather than the other way around.
3. She was giving me "points" for something that showed I was a keeper, basically (without me ever giving an indication I was looking to date). Casual hookups don't need points.

Our previous interactions were already based on a lot of sarcasm on my part, so I used the ambiguous text as a way to put her in her place and let her know I wasn't "courting" her (lol).

Also, i'm no pickup master, but reframing these types of things isn't only important to me but also a great way to flirt, in my opinion. To further solidify the point, I turned it around on her later when she said something about working out. "Major points. " It cracked her up and furthered the message in a fun way. I turned it into a fun points game.

So don't think I was just being a jerk to her about it and losing my temper- nor that I was ready to get frisk with her over it. It was more of a case of playfully yet confidently establishing the precedence.

[Mage]

There is a certain relationship point system in the popular relationship advice book "Men are from mars, women from Venus" maybe she had something like that in mind. Of course that is all blue pill bullshit. Bang her hard so she doesn't have time to read various stupid books and get any wierd ideas that might pollute her mind.

[DarkTriad]

(10-08-2012 02:19 AM)RichieP Wrote:  

If it was just about testing you for your alphaness/confidence, that's cool. These days it seems to have gone beyond that with alot of girls, to the point that it's a turnoff sometimes

Someone explained the "why" of it well in another post - it's like, they somehow wrongly connect being sassy and power-grabby with being desirable. Like they watch too much Sex and the City, they see "empowered" women with eligible men chasing after them every episode and their brains go "aha! that's how I become desired"

It's getting reinforced by TV, but the prime driver is their own attraction triggers. They meet a guy with a Harvard degree/high powered job, and are turned on by the status/power. Then they make the mistake of thinking that men will be similarily impressed by their status markers and power. It's just a girl making an "AFC" mistake.

[Alpha Mind]

I would've said the same thing.

That being said, telling women -1 point for you works like a fucking charm.

[Jam Man]

I like the reverse point system idea. This girl just told me she cant hang out today. How should I respond with the point system? Im thinking something like "Lame...-10 points" what would you guys say?

[Catch 22]

Since we're mostly power grabbers and think about these things, it's easy for us to put meaning in something women say or do, when really they tend to act brainlessly. Be careful not to overthink some of this stuff.

I personally would just show I don't care about her points. I'd ask what I'd have to say or do to lose the points, then do that. Or just make something up myself, do it right away, then say, "oooh, must have lost my points." Who cares?