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at the very bottom
#1

at the very bottom

so i am 27, never had a girlfriend, never loved anyone and wonder if i was made without that part in my brain.

this is burning me up, i want to do something about it... but i fear i will unleash something that i can't handle, will i let anyone love me back.

what's wrong with me [Image: sad.gif] - i know that before i go out - and even begin to take on girls, i need to be content with what i have - but i can't be ... because the desire is too great, and the sense of loss i feel is ripping me up...

guys, how the fuck do i escape this fucking prison that's kicking my ass :|
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#2

at the very bottom

Do you have an unfulfilled sexual desire, or are your utterly devoid of lust?

"The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other fellow married her." – H.L. Mencken
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#3

at the very bottom

i do lust - but i feel it leads me no where, like a horny dog that goes no where! i go into dirty mind mode, find myself staring at tits and ass :| - if i suppress it - i feel more in control, but also like a fucking monk.

if i see a women for what she is, in my mind the fear/anxiety comes up, but if i don't i.e. see them as just a normal person, then in my mind, i can't see myself being intimate with them ... i know this is pathetic - :|

it's like a binary switch for me ... i am just not comfortable in being in either of the states.

edit: maybe i need to see a therapist [Image: sad.gif] instead of bothering this forum
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#4

at the very bottom

Dude I know its difficult when youre a newbie but Id just start approaching like a beast, going to bars as often as you can afford (with mates and alone), and keep going until you get some success. Watch some videos of the pros approaching before you go out to get yourself psyched up, maybe have a drink or two before you go out. Its not possible to just make yourself completely content with yourself and your life without some actual real life validation. As soon as you get one good night, you stop being so obsessed with staring at women you feel like you can never interact with, get some sexual control in your life, and all the bullshit will start to melt away. But you cant get any of that without wading through a massive pile of rejection.
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#5

at the very bottom

Get a prostitute once or twice. Fuck her really well (i.e. don't leave it up to her to do all the stuff) and it should lower your anxiety. I think it could be a confidence boost if you do it right and will get you rid of those thoughts.
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#6

at the very bottom

Just do it. Start now.

Every day you delay is another day of you're entire miserable life that you're wasting instead of improving.
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#7

at the very bottom

^ exactly. You have to react and you have to do it now. I'm not even sure what's going on with you reading your posts but (unless this is trolling) seems like you're feeling really miserable. I'd hit the bars/clubs right away and try to have a good time and not worry about women at all, once you've cleared that up then you're ready to approach
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#8

at the very bottom

As a guy in a similar situation (I got my first kiss at 22, first fuck at 23. I'm 23 still, by the way) all I can really tell you is you need to just be comfortable around women. Realize they aren't special and talking or even getting rejected by one is no big deal. The fear and anxiety will still be there but you have to just fucking do it and approach. Learning the technical stuff is the easy part, changing your behavior after years of doing the same shit is hard. Talk to girls in the street, at the bar, in the club, in the line at the grocery store, at work. Talk to hot girls, ugly girls, whatever. Fuck it, talk to everyone. Soon you'll be a lot more comfortable talking in general as well as talking to girls. Next, you have to spit game at the girls you want (the resources are out there, here on the forum, Rooshv/Heartiste archives, pdfs on piratebay etc). Try everything and see what works. You'll have a lot of failures but each time you fuck up you learn something. The success will come and they are fucking sweet. Good luck man. Also, Xanax and alcohol helped tremendously with my approach anxiety in the beginning but I enjoy a wide variety of drugs and that may not be for everyone.
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