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Mind in the gutter .
#1

Mind in the gutter .

I need to vent a little . . Not trying to turn this into a book but maybe someone on here can relate.

So I read a lot of Roissy a while ago, and I've been reading the forum for a few months . .

I had a decent grasp on inner game and I was slowly starting to become very comfortable with being more bold with whatever it was I did , maintaining eye contact with women and gaming them as well . . I felt free knowing that what I was doing with girls turned them on and it was good to see results (though I never took it all the way with anything ) .

Anyways, lately I've been feeling like I'm losing the understanding of it . I'd say it's because I'm trapped right now in my hometown and I don't get out much, but I'm losing that confidence I once had where I could say anything to a girl and I wasn't afraid (and especially the eye contact) .

I'm still living at home, trying to get a job so I can move out of here in a year but it seems far away . I'm working very hard in my band and were doing fuckin awesome . We practice our asses off and we'll have shows in Boston soon .

I've fucked around with girls before, got head and shit but I have still yet to fuck a girl and it's messing with me . Since I've never really had a girlfriend (I mean I had a few but I fucked it up by being beta as hell and falling for them ) I've had people ask me if I was gay before so then I start to think that maybe I come off as a fag to people which in turn makes me incredibly self conscious to the point that I'm trapped in my head .

The internal monologue is fucking me over , stuff like "what kind of girl would want to be with you at your moms house " and so on .

I mean, I'm a very talented musician, I'm tall, I'd say handsome I guess . I just can't seem to get my mind out of the gutter .

I'm allowing the AFC mentality to take over because I haven't been experiencing any breakthroughs lately .

It was pretty embarrassing to type all of this but I've been needing to get this shit out for a while . . I could use some motivation. Anyone ever dealt with something even remotely similar to this ?
fuck.
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#2

Mind in the gutter .

Totally. In fact, location aside, I was in your exact situation to the letter.

The fact of the matter is, being in a band is cool. You seem literate and reasonably well thought out, so that is cool too. You've got goals, which is good. You want a job, thats good. You're in a band on the side that might be going places. Thats all good.

My point is, all these things are good. you've got some less than great stuff against you (Living with parents, no job, etc) but you're working your way out, which is better than a lot of people do. You can only do your best and work on it.

With the 'are you gay' thing, just work out what it is that the people are saying behind their words. Sometimes I still get the 'are you gay' question, and I'll tell you what it is in my case: I don't hit on girls that I don't want to hit on. Because they're so used to being hit on all the time just because they don't have a dick, it upsets them and they want to validate themselves. So on and so forth.

It might be because you don't exude manliness, it might be your dress sense. It might be just because you've got some haters. Work it out, move on. You'll get there.

Don't even worry about bringing girls back unless you've got strict parents. My parents never minded. Just tell them you'll be doing it some place anyway, and you know your place is clean and hygenic. (It should be!)

I would say though stick with your plans to move out when you can. I know what its like being in a small town place. It messes with you, makes you forget the world is massive and you've got big goals.

But anyway, theres nothing to feel down about. You're on the right track.
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#3

Mind in the gutter .

Thanks man . It's funny because the girl who did ask me if I was gay was the girl who always wanted to hook up with me and I always rejected her because she was always a drunken mess, and she's really unattractive.

Yeah its' weird, I'm definitely not effeminate dude , I mean I'm a bit sensitive and I'm not a meat head but definitely far from what I'd call unmanly .

But you're right, I know I've got a lot going for me but It's tough to allow myself to be happy with everything and to create that vibe .
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#4

Mind in the gutter .

Quote: (03-09-2012 02:46 PM)Pinch Wrote:  

I need to vent a little . . Not trying to turn this into a book but maybe someone on here can relate.

So I read a lot of Roissy a while ago, and I've been reading the forum for a few months . .

I had a decent grasp on inner game and I was slowly starting to become very comfortable with being more bold with whatever it was I did , maintaining eye contact with women and gaming them as well . . I felt free knowing that what I was doing with girls turned them on and it was good to see results (though I never took it all the way with anything ) .

Anyways, lately I've been feeling like I'm losing the understanding of it . I'd say it's because I'm trapped right now in my hometown and I don't get out much, but I'm losing that confidence I once had where I could say anything to a girl and I wasn't afraid (and especially the eye contact) .

I'm still living at home, trying to get a job so I can move out of here in a year but it seems far away . I'm working very hard in my band and were doing fuckin awesome . We practice our asses off and we'll have shows in Boston soon .

I've fucked around with girls before, got head and shit but I have still yet to fuck a girl and it's messing with me . Since I've never really had a girlfriend (I mean I had a few but I fucked it up by being beta as hell and falling for them ) I've had people ask me if I was gay before so then I start to think that maybe I come off as a fag to people which in turn makes me incredibly self conscious to the point that I'm trapped in my head .

The internal monologue is fucking me over , stuff like "what kind of girl would want to be with you at your moms house " and so on .

I mean, I'm a very talented musician, I'm tall, I'd say handsome I guess . I just can't seem to get my mind out of the gutter .

I'm allowing the AFC mentality to take over because I haven't been experiencing any breakthroughs lately .

It was pretty embarrassing to type all of this but I've been needing to get this shit out for a while . . I could use some motivation. Anyone ever dealt with something even remotely similar to this ?
fuck.

I feel your pain man, and i've been in shitty situations when everything seemed to go against me. The fact is that transforming yourself to the man that you want to be is a tough and lengthy process. But however fuckedup you think you are, always know that there are WAY MORE girls who want to get fucked by you than you might think.

Don't overanalyze every little thing, it will kill you. Fuck that noise. Get into stuff that will make you a better man - workout, read, learn, eat right, and do that every day. Stop re-reading Roissy's and approach as much as possible - i have a feeling that you are not doing any of that. Existence precedes and rules essence - you are not what you know and believe, you are what you DO.

As for the are you gay stuff - it's ok if you are not buying into the whole alpha approach. There are plenty of HQ girls who prefer a more 'mellow' man - as long as you feel that's congruent with your personality, fuck that noise. But if you are really bothered by it, start lifting heavy, eat paleo and do martial arts. It's pretty hard to come off as a fag with all the testosterone this will make your body produce.

I feel like you are just one success away from seeing it all clearly. I hope you will make it happen soon.

Balkan Power Individualâ„¢
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#5

Mind in the gutter .

Man, don't ever feel down on yourself. We all have ups and downs. I was homeless a few years ago and still getting ass. I didn't even lose my virginity until after high school. Start hitting those weights and make sure you're dressed decent.
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