Hey guys, maybe someone can give some insight on this. I am becoming resentfull, kind of "revengefull" towards women. Let us break this down: I was raised in a two parent household but my mother always had the control over EVERYTHING, plus I had a bossy sister, 6 years older than me. That, adding to it the public education, media indoctrination, general culture of pedestaling, glorifying of women. I didn't know all this "Game, MGTOW, PUA, Red Pill" knowledge until roughly one year ago. I was redpilled on politics, on some (((people))), on religion, economics... but I was totally blinded that the woman factor is HUGE, more than ever in human History.
Now Im realizing it all, this huge trap, how pointless it is to pursue pussy OR being pursued by pussy, how futile to bring kids in a traditional society is anyway. All this party, bachelor lifestyle, all morals and traditions, all of it doesn't seem to satisfy, all seems part of the illusion.
What I'm getting to, finally, is a place where I have deep hate against the women in general. Whereas men I don't care about, I see them as a formless mass, sometimes worthy people, others scum, interesting and inspiring or just filth of the Earth, doesn't matter to me much. But women! I just can't stand talking to them, seeing them smiling to me... all these years of bad experiences (or rather LACK of experiences) with women just make it unbereable to have a healthy communication and contact with them, because they have fallen from a very high totem right to the ground. As a kid they put a fantasy in my mind, and now I see the reality with my own eyes.
So this is the point: I can (and I do) withhold from sexual activity for very long periods of time, I mean, without orgasming or eyaculating, or without even touching or having pleasure in general (even though I would want to have said activity). Im talking about MONTHS without ejaculating/orgasming (im not into sexual yoga "press your prostate" stuff), and YEARS without contact with a woman, no sex. Im only 25 years old. People my age seem to NEED to wank or fuck at least 3-4 times a week to stay sane. I think its crazy, it reminds me of when I was 15 and would wank 2 even 3 times a day, because I had no access to women (not because I didnt try, and I come from Spain too... you guys from the anglosphere have a very distorted view of what Spain is like, you have no idea if you dont live here... you even complain of "sluts"! Where are those sluts? Lead me to them). Now I feel like when I get to be with a female in a sexual mood, it seems as if I would only enjoy the act of getting her to have sex, but I dont care about the sex at all! As if there is no enjoyment in the physical act of sex. I THINK THAT, WHEN I GET WITH A WOMAN (maybe in 1 or 2 years ahead of now, hopefully sooner) I WOULD BE CONTENT JUST TO GET TO PENETRATION AND THEN JUST STOPPING after a minute or two and she mustn't necessarily go, I would like her to stay to talk, for my goal would be done, which is having ACCESS to sexual contact. I fantasized, on the other hand, about trolling her, pulling out right right before she has the orgasm or while she is having it (I am by the way not bad at sex, I made several women have pleasure and orgasm. Im not deformed or autistic, im average and fit. And no I dont look like a refugee). Or flaking when she is really into you, seems like it would be a huge enjoyment too!
I even try not to look at them, because the more I look and desire the more I suffer because I know I can't get it. Well theoretically YES I can get it, I got in the past, but now it is just not happening even though I ran game extensively last summer. I was literally unemployed, all I did was try to get pussy (small german city). Something is very fucking wrong. Can anyone relate to this? Is this healthy at all? It feels like being trapped inside a sewer, seeing the light but not being able to go out, seeing the women but not being able to have sex with them. Men are indeed starved of sex and affection, and it seems as though things will get more extreme as days go by in todays society. Nowadays Im seeing on a daily basis 18 year olds with acne, belly, skinnyfat, braces, glasses, child hairstyle, child clothing, high pitched voices SOMETIMES ALL AT THE SAME TIME... walking around hand in hand with same aged feminine cute girls with nice bodies. I don't know if they are fucking anyway. Maybe those guys are always paying for lunch.
And no, Im not going to visit prostitutes like many spaniards do. And yes I had a failed LTR years ago. And yes I am a whiny bitch. What THE HELL is going on guys?
(I guess this thread belongs in "newbie" subforum, if not please moderators move to where it belongs)
Now Im realizing it all, this huge trap, how pointless it is to pursue pussy OR being pursued by pussy, how futile to bring kids in a traditional society is anyway. All this party, bachelor lifestyle, all morals and traditions, all of it doesn't seem to satisfy, all seems part of the illusion.
What I'm getting to, finally, is a place where I have deep hate against the women in general. Whereas men I don't care about, I see them as a formless mass, sometimes worthy people, others scum, interesting and inspiring or just filth of the Earth, doesn't matter to me much. But women! I just can't stand talking to them, seeing them smiling to me... all these years of bad experiences (or rather LACK of experiences) with women just make it unbereable to have a healthy communication and contact with them, because they have fallen from a very high totem right to the ground. As a kid they put a fantasy in my mind, and now I see the reality with my own eyes.
So this is the point: I can (and I do) withhold from sexual activity for very long periods of time, I mean, without orgasming or eyaculating, or without even touching or having pleasure in general (even though I would want to have said activity). Im talking about MONTHS without ejaculating/orgasming (im not into sexual yoga "press your prostate" stuff), and YEARS without contact with a woman, no sex. Im only 25 years old. People my age seem to NEED to wank or fuck at least 3-4 times a week to stay sane. I think its crazy, it reminds me of when I was 15 and would wank 2 even 3 times a day, because I had no access to women (not because I didnt try, and I come from Spain too... you guys from the anglosphere have a very distorted view of what Spain is like, you have no idea if you dont live here... you even complain of "sluts"! Where are those sluts? Lead me to them). Now I feel like when I get to be with a female in a sexual mood, it seems as if I would only enjoy the act of getting her to have sex, but I dont care about the sex at all! As if there is no enjoyment in the physical act of sex. I THINK THAT, WHEN I GET WITH A WOMAN (maybe in 1 or 2 years ahead of now, hopefully sooner) I WOULD BE CONTENT JUST TO GET TO PENETRATION AND THEN JUST STOPPING after a minute or two and she mustn't necessarily go, I would like her to stay to talk, for my goal would be done, which is having ACCESS to sexual contact. I fantasized, on the other hand, about trolling her, pulling out right right before she has the orgasm or while she is having it (I am by the way not bad at sex, I made several women have pleasure and orgasm. Im not deformed or autistic, im average and fit. And no I dont look like a refugee). Or flaking when she is really into you, seems like it would be a huge enjoyment too!
I even try not to look at them, because the more I look and desire the more I suffer because I know I can't get it. Well theoretically YES I can get it, I got in the past, but now it is just not happening even though I ran game extensively last summer. I was literally unemployed, all I did was try to get pussy (small german city). Something is very fucking wrong. Can anyone relate to this? Is this healthy at all? It feels like being trapped inside a sewer, seeing the light but not being able to go out, seeing the women but not being able to have sex with them. Men are indeed starved of sex and affection, and it seems as though things will get more extreme as days go by in todays society. Nowadays Im seeing on a daily basis 18 year olds with acne, belly, skinnyfat, braces, glasses, child hairstyle, child clothing, high pitched voices SOMETIMES ALL AT THE SAME TIME... walking around hand in hand with same aged feminine cute girls with nice bodies. I don't know if they are fucking anyway. Maybe those guys are always paying for lunch.
And no, Im not going to visit prostitutes like many spaniards do. And yes I had a failed LTR years ago. And yes I am a whiny bitch. What THE HELL is going on guys?
(I guess this thread belongs in "newbie" subforum, if not please moderators move to where it belongs)