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Love and Game - lifecrisis - 11-19-2018

I have been wondering about if too much game is actually detrimental for your purpose of finding "the one" and settle down with. To find real human connection, when you have all these routines and rules in your head that you execute to perfection, instead of just letting go for a moment and let it flow. If the highs are high, the lows are low, but is it worth the experience to feel that deep connection with someone where you really think you found someone you could potentially marry?

It's a safety net for not getting your heart broken, but it's also a barrier for how far up the feeling/connection scale you can reach in my opinion. Think about it, the first time you were in love, did you even have any set of rules or plans or did you just follow your stupid in love heart? It scares me to think about this because a friend of mine in psychology major did a study where he interviewed men in the age of 25-40 and the majority of them said they’ve only been in love once in their life. Some said never. It’s a small statistic so shouldn’t be counted on, but it does give a perspective on things.

I might be new in the game and don’t know much, but what’s your opinion on this? I mean we all strive for that one great girl to have by our side, and some have been through 100s of girls, why have you not found her and settled down with her yet? Most of you put the pussy on a pedestal and fuck your way through happiness. It gets tiring and superficial really quick - a lot of guys on here talk about player fatigue or game taking too much of their time. More and more PUA's are settling down and even people like Roosh would want to find something genuine to start a family with now seeing as he's getting older and older, and the player mindset is put behind. If you don’t open yourself up and show emotions/show vulnerability that is the key to making a connection with another person, then how is it done? Is game something we use as a weapon to filter out girls in this fucked up feminized society we live in, that is only getting worse and worse?

Now answer me one thing, how many times in your life have you been in love? A genuine and strong connection with another human being.

I have absolutely no doubt that game works, and im not a game denialist, but this was something me and a friend discussed the other night and would love to hear your inputs on this. Gaming too much, can it take away from your purpose of finding "true love" (not the Hollywood fantasy kind of love, but you get the point). You meet someone and she ticks all the boxes while you don't get bored of fucking her after a few months, and also you stop looking and thinking about other girls when you're with her. A girl that changes you.


Love and Game - kaotic - 11-19-2018

Quote: (11-19-2018 05:18 PM)lifecrisis Wrote:  

I have been wondering about if too much game is actually detrimental for your purpose of finding "the one" and settle down with. To find real human connection, when you have all these routines and rules in your head that you execute to perfection, instead of just letting go for a moment and let it flow. If the highs are high, the lows are low, but is it worth the experience to feel that deep connection with someone where you really think you found someone you could potentially marry?

Your first mistake is thinking there is "the one" your "soul mate" your "other half".

Men have been sold this love story for 100's of years.

Only YOU can complete yourself, a woman COMPLEMENTS your life.

You want real human connection? Look at around at your friends and family, those are real connections aren't they?

You had those before of even thinking about women in a romantic way.

Quote:Quote:

It's a safety net for not getting your heart broken, but it's also a barrier for how far up the feeling/connection scale you can reach in my opinion. Think about it, the first time you were in love, did you even have any set of rules or plans or did you just follow your stupid in love heart?


No it's not a safety net at all, players get their hearts broken or they get burned by a girl.

Player's aren't immune to this at all, however they ARE more wise and smart when it comes to dealing with women.

You cannot compare a boys first love to love in a relationship that leads to marriage.

That's apples to oranges, that's not a fair comparison at all.

Quote:Quote:

It scares me to think about this because a friend of mine in psychology major did a study where he interviewed men in the age of 25-40 and the majority of them said they’ve only been in love once in their life. Some said never. It’s a small statistic so shouldn’t be counted on, but it does give a perspective on things.

If something scares you then you better start understanding it and what causes that fear.

That "study" probably wasn't a real study at all - it wasn't probably clinical - if it is, I want to see stats and numbers.

Otherwise this is just fluff.

Quote:Quote:

I might be new in the game and don’t know much, but what’s your opinion on this? I mean we all strive for that one great girl to have by our side, and some have been through 100s of girls, why have you not found her and settled down with her yet? Most of you put the pussy on a pedestal and fuck your way through happiness. It gets tiring and superficial really quick - a lot of guys on here talk about player fatigue or game taking too much of their time.

For a newbie to make statements like this make sense.

My opinion is to start reading, start adapting the lessons and strategies you learn here in your own way.

I'm not looking for "the one", I'm looking for women who complement my life and I'm more into quality, doesn't mean I'm still not playing the field.

Why should men heed societal norms of dating, marriage, and family when most women do not heed these standards?

Player's aren't putting pussy on a pedestal - they're putting it underneath the pedestal that they're sitting on.

Why and how? Because they aren't playing the same games as some beta dweeb, they're learning the "game" and playing outside of the rules.

Just because a man is chasing pussy doesn't mean he isn't improving his life in other ways.

Dudes get player fatigue yes, but they take breaks, throttle down, diversify their time, BUT THEY DO NOT STOP.

You think game stops when you find "the one"? You've just opened a whole new world of game in marriage/family/kids.

Quote:Quote:

More and more PUA's are settling down and even people like Roosh would want to find something genuine to start a family with now seeing as he's getting older and older, and the player mindset is put behind. If you don’t open yourself up and show emotions/show vulnerability that is the key to making a connection with another person, then how is it done? Is game something we use as a weapon to filter out girls in this fucked up feminized society we live in, that is only getting worse and worse?

Most guys just want a girl that's decent to have a family with, but this forum goes a few steps further than that.

The player mindset NEVER goes away, once you're "unplugged", you're always weary and always try to keep your skills/tools sharp.

See? Now you're onto something.

YES, we use it, not as a weapon, but as a SKILL, to filter for women we WANT to be with, and of course by default that filters out women we aren't interested in.

GAME IS NOT A LIFESTYLE BUT A VAST AMOUNT OF TOOLS TO USE IN YOUR LIFE. GAME IS JUST NOT FOR DEALING WITH WOMEN.

Keep in mind this forum is a highly concentrated form of the red pill, so if you go outside the world isn't all doom and gloom and there are good humans out there.


Quote:Quote:

Now answer me one thing, how many times in your life have you been in love? A genuine and strong connection with another human being.

A few times with women, and I love alot of my friends and even tell them I do.

This goes back to my last statement, you knew about love and genuine/strong connections long before you wanted to have sex with girls.

Quote:Quote:

I have absolutely no doubt that game works, and im not a game denialist, but this was something me and a friend discussed the other night and would love to hear your inputs on this. Gaming too much, can it take away from your purpose of finding "true love" (not the Hollywood fantasy kind of love, but you get the point). You meet someone and she ticks all the boxes while you don't get bored of fucking her after a few months, and also you stop looking and thinking about other girls when you're with her. A girl that changes you.

I don't think you're a game denialist, I think you're inexperienced and are still holding onto the notions of finding a true love to fulfill. You're still slightly plugged in.

I'm here to rattle you off the plug and to tell you that you won't find that in real life.

Yes, you can find love, but you damn well better be prepared to handle that in all the right ways when you do find a woman you enjoy being around, whose passed all your filters, checked all your boxes, and you want to have children with after carefully vetting her.

But here's why you need game and experience, women are unpredictable at times.

Your only way of handling this is the skills you learned with game and experiences with women.

You should never change for a woman, and she shouldn't want to change you.

If she does in the slightest it's supporting your goals, dreams, endeavors, a woman who makes you want to be a better man and focus on your life goals.


Love and Game - RatInTheWoods - 11-20-2018

When I read some of the post from younger members, how they bang 100 women a year, choking and spitting in their mouth etc etc.

I do think they may have future pair bonding issues.....

Game, like alcohol is a thing you can enjoy, or it can destroy you - choose your consumption methods carefully.


Love and Game - Flux - 11-20-2018

Wanting to be in love for the feeling of it is very unwise, immature. Your self love has to be more than enough.

A woman is there to give you a family, and to support you in achieving your goals. The leader is never supposed to be understood emotionally, he is a symbol of strength, and that's what you have to be to women.

A woman doesn't want your soul, she wants to give you hers.


Love and Game - Dasein - 11-20-2018

I think there is a phase of learning game that is highly destructive. It happens when you learn to mechanically manipulate women to get laid. It happens when you learn that the same thing that works on a total slut will also probably work on a relatively innocent girl as well. This creates a mental dissonance because you start to realize that there are several reasons the techniques are called "game"-- one of which is that social interactions can be game-like in nature and that you can become a "player", as in, an intelligence that controls yourself and performs actions that will lead to a desired outcome without any actual expression of self. Shaping your own actions to that extent is literal "self" destruction. So, that phase of game where you become terrifyingly effective leads to this devaluing of yourself and other human beings.

Luckily, if you grow out of that, something great does come from it, in my opinion. Which is an understanding or mastery of yourself. The voluntary shaping that occurs not when we understand what others value and what we value, building an identity on the overlap of those things rather than becoming the self that exists for others (the "they-self"). Authentic being in the world is one of the possibilities that is powerfully revealed when you move past complete inauthentic being. This is when you get natural game.

Your ideas about the "one" are something of a trap. There are many "ones". Happiness is something you find on your own and there are many possible women who you could share that happiness with, not just the "one". There is not just one flavor of ice cream or one kind of food-- there are many and they are great in different ways. Understanding your options makes you better understand your conscious decision to commit to a woman.

Game provides a lens for understanding women and will win you women as well, among those that it wins you, you can select the one you want the most. Game will put you in that position. It does not let you pick /which/ exact women you can win, but it widens the pool of those who you could win, if that makes sense.

What I think we are seeing is a realization that a lot of this pre-marriage stuff is very masturbatory. Like, yes, you can put your cock in the mouths, vaginas, and anuses of various women, but you're just having your turn with them unless you are going to advance the conversation to family or building something lasting together. A more complete success can be had through building a legacy and perpetuating a family that inherits not just your genes but also your values. Together you strengthen the presence of your values in the world.

Hating or despising women is a really bad road to go down. I have actually dated many great women. In almost all of my relationships, I have been the asshole and not the other way around. Not to say that bad women do not exist-- they do. But good women do too. And yes, they can be won with game, at least, initially, but it will take more to keep them and quality women are going to test more, not because they want to see that you're alpha, but because they want to see that you're authentic. Inauthentic men are dangerous to themselves and others.

Currently I am sick. Last weekend a girl came over and brought me soup, medicine, and all of my favorite snacks. During Sunday football she made a plate of food for me, kept me topped off on water and beer, and generally devoted all of her time to being nurturing and feminine. That is some pretty powerful stuff and I do not think that game alone compels women to go that far.

What game is best at is letting you make your choice with no regrets and with full conscious knowledge of how all the flavors taste, so to speak. The whole reason I got into game was because I wanted one very specific experience. I got it and more. But the real benefit is that I can easily clear the first stages of romance with women and find out if there is compatibility.


Love and Game - BadBoyGamer - 11-20-2018

@Dasein
You wrote some nice posts recently.

@lifecrisis
Forget the idea of "the one" or "true love". Those are fantasies and not real.

Quote:lifecrisis Wrote:

To find real human connection, when you have all these routines and rules in your head that you execute to perfection, instead of just letting go for a moment and let it flow.

Game is not about executing routines like a machine. Game is a skill. A skill to make those valuable human connections with girls.

Quote:Dasein Wrote:

It happens when you learn that the same thing that works on a total slut will also probably work on a relatively innocent girl as well. This creates a mental dissonance...

Not if you are Red Pilled. Having a clear understanding of how human sexuality works removes this cognitive dissonance.


Love and Game - JackinMelbourne - 11-20-2018

I just skimmed this thread because I felt like it, but one thing to remember is that "game" doesn't automatically mean you need to churn through and bang a bazillion bitches like it's the bang-olympics.

You can test your skills all the time and gather data/experience without banging them all, and it's heaps fun when you shut 'em down... and there's nothing wrong with being a serial monogamist if you enjoy going all in with your feels and doing the girlfriend experience.

But sooner or later, you'll learn. Yes, you'll learn that you need to SMARTEN THE FUCK UP. /END THREAD.


Love and Game - quaker13 - 11-20-2018

Quote: (11-20-2018 12:05 AM)RatInTheWoods Wrote:  

When I read some of the post from younger members, how they bang 100 women a year, choking and spitting in their mouth etc etc.

I do think they may have future pair bonding issues.....

Game, like alcohol is a thing you can enjoy, or it can destroy you - choose your consumption methods carefully.

It's not a matter of having a pair bonding issue, it's just that some of us aren't wired for pair bonding. I believe Dr. Doug Lisle from the "Beat Your Genes" podcast surmises about 10% of males have genes that promote casual mating as opposed pair bonding. The same goes for women, the vast majority of them are designed for pair bonding but there is a small percentage that have a casual mating gene.