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Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Printable Version

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Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Quizzical_2 - 03-09-2018

If youre trying to build up attraction, and youre in the early stages of a relationship, is always talking about your emotions and feelings a bad thing? Is that an automatic disqualification for you to a girl as a potential mate?


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - LINUX - 03-09-2018

Never talk about your feelings and emotions with your women. Your job is to hold them together, not the other way around.

But feel free to be open and honest about your problems and life with your close male friends. That is after-all, why we have friends.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Keepiticy2 - 03-10-2018

the way i personally see it is. Be that mysterious gift from God. Be an Oasis, the sanctuary from her day to day problems.

She gets a vacation from the world when she's with you, you get sex (great high quality sex if you do it right)

A girl shouldn't know anything really. Tell vague but interesting stories, Don't give too many details, Only tell interesting or funny stories etc.


A woman's life in her mind is waaaay harder than any man on this planet. So don't bore her or upset her with your trivial problems.



Now talking about your feelings towards her is harder. You CAN do it but you have to add a very sexual overtone to it. This is so difficult to pull off that you should just avoid it


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Montrose - 03-10-2018

The idea is to show that you are a sensitive person and that you value emotions but not actually describe your feelings because that’s boring. How can you do that?

- ask her about her emotions: Do you like your job? How do you feel about this and that?
- mention times when you were in love or passionate about something, or how much you were moved when you read Moby Dick (but don’t dwell on the subject, just suggest)
- talk about emotions in general scientific terms. Do some research on wikipedia about neurobiology of emotions, about Love or Limerence or Compassion or what not. Women often find this subject interesting.
- as for your feelings toward her, drop a hint from time to time but keep it very short. Say ‘I’ve been missing you’ in a cheerful way. If she likes you she will ask about it but you should just answer evasively.

When you talk to a girl (assuming you’re trying to seduce her) you should always talk fact/emotion. It should become second nature.
- What do you do? / do you like your job?
- What did you do today? / was it fun?
- I read Moby Dick / it’s so moving
- Donald Trump was elected / what a relief
It’s not very natural for a man but it’s the way women see the world.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Montrose - 03-10-2018

If she asks you if you love her, look away in the distance, sigh, if possible catch a tear running down your rough moustache, and shut the fuck up.

Work every time


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Bain - 03-10-2018

Showing emotion is like throwing water over fire.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - eL-JJ - 03-10-2018

In the topic of emotions, how bad is letting your women see you cry?, and not in the bawling your eyes out like a little bitch way, i'm talking about tearing up in a situation where you saw something that hit you.

I've read that you should never show any type of vulnerability, and trying to understand the negative effects of this.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Montrose - 03-10-2018

Courage is not the absence of emotions (that would be sociopath) but being strong in the face of negative emotions. There is a saying ‘pain is necessary but suffering is optional’

You can show your pain but not your suffering. You can show your vulnerability, but not dwell on it or expect consolation from your girl. My take anyway. Tears are allright but sobbing is definitely out.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Simeon_Strangelight - 03-10-2018

A man should be like a rock. Occasionally that rock can squeeze out a tear - and then it will be symbol for veneration and great joy to the woman. Other women will flock to see that rock shed a tear. Because you know - he is a rock after all.

But when the man is a plastic bag of water, then no one cares. Women will kick that bag around to see him cry for amusement.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - RawGod - 03-10-2018

Quote: (03-09-2018 01:38 PM)LINUX Wrote:  

Never talk about your feelings and emotions with your women.

I feel somewhat sad to admit it, but this is true. As I look back over all my relationships with women - of all kinds including family members and friends - being vulnerable (or for that matter, letting them in on strategic, logical thinking driving my actions) has never, ever led to anything good.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - HankMoody - 03-10-2018

Always always always a bad thing. Do not never talk about your emotions or feelings with a woman.

Talk about your feelings and emotions with your male friends, if you feel the need to. Or better yet, your pastor, therapist, attorney, etc.

Women take any sign of vulnerability as a weakness. And while they might find it "so sweet", it also makes their ginas dry up, and Tinder account go back on.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Leonard D Neubache - 03-10-2018

Quote: (03-10-2018 07:23 AM)HankMoody Wrote:  

...
Women take any sign of vulnerability as a weakness. And while they might find it "so sweet", it also makes their ginas dry up, and Tinder account go back on.

Worse. Women will actually ask you to show your feelings and if you do they'll quickly torpedo the relationship.

They will actually list criteria for a relationship that includes "must be able to express his feelings" when doing this on the first date or any other will get your ass kicked to the curb.

Without even realising it, women put up a facade which is a trap to weed out beta males. Women want the strongest man possible, so what better way to weed out the weak ones than to invite a display of that weakness.

But biology needs the trap to be even more perfect, so in order to make sure the woman is convincing she must be unaware of the ruse herself.

Believe it. When bitches invite a display of weakness it is her primitive subconscious taking the reins to determine whether your ass is a biological dead-end. Meanwhile, she's just along for the ride.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - ChefAllDay - 03-10-2018

Quote: (03-10-2018 05:19 AM)eL-JJ Wrote:  

In the topic of emotions, how bad is letting your women see you cry?, and not in the bawling your eyes out like a little bitch way, i'm talking about tearing up in a situation where you saw something that hit you.

Only when watching a movie about a man and his dog/horse dying, or news clips about soldiers coming home in a box, etc. That's the only "appropriate" time to shed a small tear


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Keepiticy2 - 03-10-2018

Once opened up completely to a girl and she strategically used all my weakness against me. I was prepared for it but it was a bit hilarious as to how predictable she was.

its all a test, she wants validation/attention. and once she gets that, you seem easy


That's why i believe telling a girl that you love her is the biggest mistake you can make in a relationship (contrary to every movie)


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Bain - 03-10-2018

Showing your emotions to someone who is higher than you is different that someone who is lower or at your level. Showing your emotions to someone lower than you can be disastrous.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Batman_ - 03-10-2018

Setting aside the fact that talking about your feelings will almost always make a girl lose attraction to you, it still has little to no real benefit or purpose in the first place.

If you simply want to have some emotional support, tell your close friends or maybe your family if you're close with them. The more serious the problem, the less people you should tell. There are things I've dealt with that I may take to the grave. No one is going to understand your life better than you, and almost no one will be able to offer you any helpful advice or support. The only reason to talk about your feelings with friends/family is to help you think out loud and know that someone cares. Deep, abstract, existential problems might be solved with psychoanalysis. Behavioral problems might be solved with cognitive behavioral therapy.

Women don't have the slightest idea what men go through. Due to their solipsistic nature, their problems and emotions take precedent over yours. They will interpret it is a sign of weakness and rapidly lose attraction or respect towards you. Even if you meet the 1 in a 100 girl who isn't turned off by you sharing your feelings/problems, she won't really be able to do anything about it.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Tigre - 03-10-2018

Emotions can be more than just anxiety and problems. There are positive emotions, too.

It should be fine to mention positive emotions, within reason. They can add depth to whatever story you are telling.

You can even hint at negative emotion, if you like. Sometimes that's a better approach than staunchly denying that you ever felt anything about anything.

But you don't go into detail about it. She has to be assured that you've got that shit contained and under your control.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Monkey Business - 03-11-2018

This thread has been really insightful, thank you brothers. I'm going to put this information to use as a sort of preventative maintenance. It also brings to mind an interaction in The Godfather, in the scene where Vito Corleone says to his son Santino;

"Santino, come here. What's the matter with you? I think your brain is going soft with all that comedy you are playing with that young girl. Never tell anyone outside the Family what you are thinking again. Go on."

I think the mafia analogy fits pretty well overall in dealing with women. Us (awakened) men are in the Family, and they women certainly are not. Run your game like a business and keep emotion out of it; publicly speaking, or as far as others can tell. Yet confide in the Family when you feel the need.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Geomann180 - 03-11-2018

Yes and no.

I think like anything in life, there's a balance to be struck. And like anything else in the last 40 years or when dealing with a woman, there's the matter what words are used, what they actually mean, and what is actually meant. Definitely show positive emotions. Don't be afraid to tell her you like her or that you're having a good time. Or that she makes you feel good. Or that she made you feel better today. Of course, there's a right way and wrong way to do this (maybe wait until after you've kissed her or more before you tell her you like her). Definitely show some negative emotions. If you're sad because a family member died, you don't have to hide it. If you're angry about something a coworker did to piss you off, you can talk about it (though maybe include how you deal with it so he can't screw you over again). If you don't get angry about something when you have cause to be, or just stand by and do nothing, that's wrong and unhealthy.

But don't ever lose it. Don't bawl in front of her. You can show sadness in your face with contorting it into a theatrical twist of pain. Don't fall apart because of something small. The moment you lose yourself in your emotions is the moment she leaves you.

I wasn't very specific in how I answered this and the reason is because that's not my final answer for $1,000,000. It's just what I am working with right now.

G


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Leonard D Neubache - 03-11-2018

The one caveat is probably anger.

Expressing every now and then how much issue X pisses me off and how I'd like to rip the heart out of asshole Y with my bare hands seems to make my wife far more wifely. [Image: lol.gif]


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Kieran - 03-11-2018

It can build comfort by creating a connection, but it lowers attraction. On the other hand most things that raise attraction, break rapport and reduce comfort. You really need to be monitoring where you are in your relationship with the girl and whether you could do with more comfort, or more attraction. I do it quite a lot as a deliberate way of manufacturing a connection. Be careful though because it works and you can make girls fall in love with you, and even more dangerously sharing with each other can also cause you to start feeling a connection to the girl yourself.


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Doogie - 03-11-2018

Quote: (03-10-2018 08:03 AM)ChefAllDay Wrote:  

Quote: (03-10-2018 05:19 AM)eL-JJ Wrote:  

In the topic of emotions, how bad is letting your women see you cry?, and not in the bawling your eyes out like a little bitch way, i'm talking about tearing up in a situation where you saw something that hit you.

Only when watching a movie about a man and his dog/horse dying, or news clips about soldiers coming home in a box, etc. That's the only "appropriate" time to shed a small tear

Or if your grandfather / father dies


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Days of Broken Arrows - 03-11-2018

Quote: (03-11-2018 09:00 PM)Doogie Wrote:  

Quote: (03-10-2018 08:03 AM)ChefAllDay Wrote:  

Quote: (03-10-2018 05:19 AM)eL-JJ Wrote:  

In the topic of emotions, how bad is letting your women see you cry?, and not in the bawling your eyes out like a little bitch way, i'm talking about tearing up in a situation where you saw something that hit you.

Only when watching a movie about a man and his dog/horse dying, or news clips about soldiers coming home in a box, etc. That's the only "appropriate" time to shed a small tear

Or if your grandfather / father dies

Doogie? Where's Vinny?


Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Doogie - 03-12-2018

Quote: (03-11-2018 09:25 PM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  

Quote: (03-11-2018 09:00 PM)Doogie Wrote:  

Quote: (03-10-2018 08:03 AM)ChefAllDay Wrote:  

Quote: (03-10-2018 05:19 AM)eL-JJ Wrote:  

In the topic of emotions, how bad is letting your women see you cry?, and not in the bawling your eyes out like a little bitch way, i'm talking about tearing up in a situation where you saw something that hit you.

Only when watching a movie about a man and his dog/horse dying, or news clips about soldiers coming home in a box, etc. That's the only "appropriate" time to shed a small tear

Or if your grandfather / father dies

Last major role in the Sopranos [Image: smile.gif]

Doogie? Where's Vinny?



Should you talk about your emotions or feelings at all with girls? - Dalaran1991 - 03-13-2018

Depends if it's deployed strategically. Vulnerability game is a thing:

https://heartiste.wordpress.com/2009/01/...lity-game/

This seems to work for me pretty well in Paris where the girls are very new-agey, but then I run a standard asshole game. As said, contrast is king. I imagine it would work well in NYC, Cali or Boston.