Going out Solo - Printable Version

Going out Solo - Printable Version

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Going out Solo - MrPink - 09-13-2011

Referring to an older thread by BostonBMW, I realize that many of the more seasoned players prefer going out solo or with maximum 1 wing.

Is it advisable for a newbie to do the same? Can going out alone put out a creepy or antisocial vibe?

Going out Solo - Dash Global - 09-13-2011

There is numerous threads on this.

For a newbie with little experience?!? Hell naw

Your game needs to tight. With a ton of inner confidence and with alot social skills as you will more than likely be befriending mix sets.

Going out Solo - satanova77 - 09-13-2011

I did it for first time last month and had a blast with it. Read Roosh's post that its definitely the way to go and that got me ready for it. I followed his tips and once i started working it was lighter and more carefree than having a wingman. But wingman has its advantages. Like Dash said hte game has to be to a certain level to do this. But if you dont have any wing I would rather venture solo than stay bottled up. The learning curve will be harsh but worth it.

Going out Solo - thegmanifesto - 09-13-2011

MrPink -

Give it a shot, for all that is lost is one night.

Going out Solo - at350zguyy - 09-13-2011

going dolo has given yielded me much more success than going with a wingman. and i'm a noob in this too.

Going out Solo - Dash Global - 09-13-2011

Quote: (09-13-2011 01:50 PM)at350zguyy Wrote:

going dolo has given yielded me much more success than going with a wingman. and i'm a noob in this too.

Share your strategy / blueprint for running successful dolo game for the OP

Going out Solo - Moma - 09-13-2011

Going dolo is a must for anyone on the track to being a player. It's a bit like being a rapper, to be a legit rapper, one must be able to spit a freestyle (without looking at their blackberry *coughs*).

Going dolo forces you to be busy and gives you NO excuse not to step to a lizard. Once you do it, you will feel an exhilirating rush sweep your body.

It reminds me of when I first gamed a lizard on the job in UK. She was a customer and I was as shy as fcuk but as I handed her the change (I was a cashier), I said "Let me get your number too".

I almost felt washed with joy when I jumped over that childish yet real hurdle.

It's a must. Go dolo.

Going out Solo - OGNorCal707 - 09-13-2011

I still struggle rolling solo, and admitedly will often not go out certain nights when I don't have a wing, but this is often due to the fact that when I go out with a wing(s)/friend(s) I'm way more in a social mood, when you roll dolo you really got to push yourself sometimes, unless you're having some form of cabin fever and are super jazzed up about getting out the house and hitting the town.

Roosh's post on going solo is golden, read that, then re-read it accordingly. Some tips that I picked up from that post, plus other posts from threads on this forum I will share briefly:

Pick a spot and post up. Don't be the guy who walks around the bar/club aimlessly in circles, this will draw attention to you, makes it look like you're obviously alone, and "aimless", and awkward.

Maintain strong, confident body language, this is crucial. If you are constantly fidgeting, looking around the room, shifting your body, etc. You will look like that creepy guy, that everyone wants to avoid looking like. As Roosh says, "make slow, confident movements", like you're James Bond.

Don't constantly stare at your cell phone every five minutes, anyone who happens to notice you (lizards are kind of like social robots, constantly scanning), this will make you look insecure, and like you're uncomfortable.

It's okay to use your phone as a prop, I'm not a big fan of this, but I don't doubt it works. Pretend to have a conversation, you can even talk loudly about something that conveys social value ("Yeah man, I just got back from Vegas, and had the craziest night, you won't even believe some of the stories I'm gonna tell you.") Personally I prefer to send text messages to my other phone, so it looks like I'm communicating with someone.

Open people that enter your "orbit". Sit at the bar, and when girls stand next to you, when ordering there drinks, open them about how you like their "scarf, bag, ring, necklace, tattoo, etc." It can really be that easy sometimes... "Hey I like your bag, it looks like it might be from S. America...?"

As Roosh points out, when you post up and open people that enter your orbit, if you get rejected or the interaction doesn't go well, it forces THEM to walk away, so to the outside observer, you don't have to do the "walk of shame".

Personally, I don't smoke ciggs because I find them to be foul for the most part, but G-Man is right about ciggerette game. This is perhaps the easiest way to open a set when solo. Slide out to the patio, roll up and ask for a light, offer a light, ask for a smoke, offer a smoke. Smoking ciggs can be a bonding experience for people and a natural segue into convo.

Talk to bar staff, bouncers, etc. They work there, unless they are super busy, they will most likely be down to chat. I go to a local dive bar once a week, so at this point I know all the bartenders and bouncers and can bounce around making chat with all of them during low periods.

Try to infiltrate mixed sets. Some people might advise against this, but examine logistics for a good in. You meet a cool bro out with his GF and two of her single friends... Befriend that fool, buy him a drink, get introduced to the friends, charm the group, get approval, then isolate with your target.

Don't be afraid to buy a couple drinks. I think Roosh pointed this out on a past post. Personally I prefer to drink high end liquor over beer, and don't like that shwag beer shit. Right now PBR is back in because hipsters who like to look poor and thus "cool" like to drink it, and blue collar joe, I'm a "real man" like to drink it too. Shit is mad cheap like $2.00, if I buy a round for a few new friends, I'm not really breaking the bank.

Hope this helps!!

Going out Solo - PDX - 09-13-2011

I like to "cluster" venues. IE, I'll plan on a sequence of ~3 bars that are geographically close. This way, if I run into a dead scene or get blown out, I'm just there for one drink and then bounce to the next. Keeps you from getting that "sitting in a bar getting sloshed by yourself" mentality. And by the time you get to the last bar, it should be pretty late and people should be drunker, friendlier, and less guarded. (Which brings up another point, you should try to maintain a sobriety level that's higher than the environment your in.)

Going out Solo - thegmanifesto - 09-13-2011

Quote: (09-13-2011 02:40 PM)OGNorCal707 Wrote:

Personally, I don't smoke ciggs because I find them to be foul for the most part, but G-Man is right about ciggerette game. This is perhaps the easiest way to open a set when solo. Slide out to the patio, roll up and ask for a light, offer a light, ask for a smoke, offer a smoke. Smoking ciggs can be a bonding experience for people and a natural segue into convo.

Glad that it is working for you.

In the days of fuzzy hats, "IOI's", "Kino" and black nail polish, many people in the world either forgot or never knew the basics.

I am all about the foundational sh*t that has stood the test of time.

Going out Solo - satanova77 - 09-13-2011

When i went solo (about to do it again this week and weekend)....i was nervous but sat at the bar at a fine wine bar....talked to bartender about wine and asked for recommendation...then 42 yr old beta sat next to me and just with my pose and demeanour(based on Roosh' advice above)...he was impressed.....asked for my number so he could wing with me...his excuse for bad game : "i am too busy with work".....but i chatted him up to warm up....

Two 7s came and sat next to us on the bar he just kept looking as i got up walked and stood where i was physically addressing both of them... "hi i am satanova... what are you ladies out celebrating...."....they did ask me if i dumped my friend and i used Roosh's line "i dont have any friends"....and they laughed so loud the whole bar turned...

And just with that i lost fear of being by myself...i felt great...even though love hanging with my buddies and had some good success and times but now i know this.....

NO MATTER WHERE I AM I WONT BE LONELY.....

Going out Solo - MrPink - 09-14-2011

Thanks gentleman, for the input.

Last night I went out solo, but trying to keep a relaxed, confident vibe. I took GManifesto's advice:

Quote:Quote:

Give it a shot, for all that is lost is one night.

Last night I gained.
My goal was approaching two women, but I ended up talking to four. A couple of acquaintances I met asked with slight disbelief/respect "you're out alone?!"

I would conclude that going out alone is better for gaming, especially as a newbie, since you're putting yourself in the deep end.

Going out Solo - Mrs. Chocolate - 09-14-2011

Guys, could you give me some tips to going out by myself without looking desperate/crazy to men?
All my friends are committed right now. And, here in Br is quite rare girls with boyfriends go out by themselves. They do, but not that often and not at places who are better to interact to other groups.

Going out Solo - Gmac - 09-14-2011

Quote: (09-14-2011 06:37 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:

Guys, could you give me some tips to going out by myself without looking desperate/crazy to men?
All my friends are committed right now. And, here in Br is quite rare girls with boyfriends go out by themselves. They do, but not that often and not at places who are better to interact to other groups.

Going out alone doesn't make a woman look desperate or crazy in itself, just make sure you pick the right venue. Hotel bars and lounges are great for that.

Going out Solo - Mrs. Chocolate - 09-15-2011

We don`t have this kind of venue here... Maybe Hotel Unique, but not lounges.
Dinner Bars, as you know in US, a place to go after work to have a drink and maybe a snack and maybe get approached are not like this here. they are made to eat and drink something and interact with your own friends.
That said, to be approached I need to go to a stand up bar, a bar itself with happy hour scene AND yes, latin men see a girl by herself in a nice outfit as desperate person with social behavior issues, therefore as a "easy", slutty girl. Is still not accepted. (this is the XXI century).

Going out Solo - Amour Fou - 09-15-2011

Quote: (09-15-2011 06:59 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:

That said, to be approached I need to go to a stand up bar, a bar itself with happy hour scene AND yes, latin men see a girl by herself in a nice outfit as desperate person with social behavior issues, therefore as a "easy", slutty girl. Is still not accepted. (this is the XXI century).

... Really?

You see, if you had a beach in São Paulo you wouldn't be having these problems; guys would be approaching you at the beach! [Image: angel.gif]

Just teasing, haha

But I tend to disagree with you. Just go to a club and start dancing. Make friends with other girls there. Girls go to the toilet to chat their ass off, just join in the chat and you'll have some company.

I actually admire girls with some initiative, ie going out by themselves. I knew a girl who did so. She was really pretty, so she got 'friends' right off the bat. If you have the looks, it helps a lot also.

Going out Solo - at350zguyy - 09-16-2011

Quote: (09-13-2011 01:54 PM)Dash Global Wrote:

Quote: (09-13-2011 01:50 PM)at350zguyy Wrote:

going dolo has given yielded me much more success than going with a wingman. and i'm a noob in this too.

Share your strategy / blueprint for running successful dolo game for the OP

For some time this summer, I had a friend who was a finalist on the tv show Masterchef. She threw a bunch of viewing parties at some upscale lounges and bars in my town, so I would attend as many as I could. The majority of the crowd that came was young single women (mostly Indian).

This was generally in the timeframe of 6-8pm, on Monday and Tuesday evening, so the shields were way down compared to the weekends.

The key to my successful solo dolo escapades was confidence and building comfort rapidly. I haven't done as much traveling as some of the playboys here, but I think I've done a reasonable amount, so I had plenty of things to share with the girls I interacted with.

There was one point at which I had the attention of about 6 girls that I just met that evening on me, while the rest of the single dudes were talking to one another. What got their attention on to me was that they didn't believe how young I was (they all thought I was at least 30), so I got them to play a guess my age game. Some of their eyes lit up when they found out I was younger than they thought.

In addition to confidence, having that fun and playful vibe worked really well for me as well. When you're out solo, that's the vibe you should give off. It's gotten to a point where I no longer fear talking to any girl that is there, and I feel confident enough regardless of whether I have a positive or negative result and regardless of how good looking the girl is.

The only downside to this was that eventually these parties got diluted with weesh Indian guys who were there just because of all the pictures on facebook. One more reason to hate social media!

Going out Solo - Mrs. Chocolate - 09-17-2011

Quote: (09-15-2011 08:21 PM)Amour Fou Wrote:

Quote: (09-15-2011 06:59 AM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:

That said, to be approached I need to go to a stand up bar, a bar itself with happy hour scene AND yes, latin men see a girl by herself in a nice outfit as desperate person with social behavior issues, therefore as a "easy", slutty girl. Is still not accepted. (this is the XXI century).

... Really?

You see, if you had a beach in São Paulo you wouldn't be having these problems; guys would be approaching you at the beach!

Just teasing, haha

But I tend to disagree with you. Just go to a club and start dancing. Make friends with other girls there. Girls go to the toilet to chat their ass off, just join in the chat and you'll have some company.

I actually admire girls with some initiative, ie going out by themselves. I knew a girl who did so. She was really pretty, so she got 'friends' right off the bat. If you have the looks, it helps a lot also.

Well, it depends... have you ever been in a women bathroom in a club??? it is messy, drunk girls walking around (I haaaate drunk girls)...But I agree that people talk a lot there, but is a place to pass by. Not to live in LOL! Anyway, I will try go by myself someday and see what happens.

Going out Solo - Amour Fou - 09-17-2011

Quote: (09-17-2011 04:37 PM)Mrs. Chocolate Wrote:

Well, it depends... have you ever been in a women bathroom in a club???

A drunk girl took me in there once. [Image: wink.gif]

Drunk girls... gotta love'em! [Image: sleepy.gif]

Going out Solo - Dr Feelgood - 09-20-2011

Since I have been starting doing this and mostly going out alone, not a single time was it an issue for the girl that I was out alone. As far as I remember, I haven't even being asked about it a single time. Remember, whatever you feel, she feels - if it's not awkward for you, it won't seem strange to her!

The first time you go out alone it feels weird and not too good, but you get used to it if you do it on a regular basis. It becomes a non-issue quickly, like everything else automatically becomes a non-issue over time. Then approaching becomes a non-issue. Then holding up a conversation becomes a non-issue. Then make-outs...etc etc, you get the idea! Joy in repetition.

Also, going out alone is definitely better than going out with a non-excellent wingman. These days, I find the biggest advantage of having a wing is to get into state quickly and even before entering the venue, and also for a bit of feedback (the one-eyed leading the bloind, etc....) plus having somebody to talk to in between sets or for isolation in "emergencies".

Going out Solo - isis - 09-30-2011

I went out with a friend, not really a wingman, more of a AFC himself.

I used to go clubbing a few years back, mostly it was all about getting wasted,

Tonight, for the first time I felt I had inner game: I wasn't caught up in the music or the atmosphere, I knew what I wanted, and let nothing shake me; at one point I was walking across the dance floor to get to the other side, when "shorty it's your birthday" was playing, this cute chick maybe a 7 was in my way, she kept dancing, I tried to go around, kept dancing, when I finally politely shuffled around her, she bumped into me by on purpose, for the first time I was the one in control.

I thought to myself, "I don't really want to dance, all I want to get you in bed", am I anti game? [Image: biggrin.gif]

Going out Solo - NightWolf - 10-02-2011

I consider myself a noob in the game, but now I go out solo at night all the time and it is so much easier to socialize than when I go out with a wing. I have worked my inner game a lot with hypnosis audio so that I feel composed and totally comfortable going to a place where people are with friends (no cell phone fidgeting, etc...).

I was a bit apprehensive at the idea at first because of the alleged awkwardness. But it is actually fun and exciting and the best way to push you out of your comfort zone to learn something. Take it as a challenge: if it feels difficult, then you are learning something.

Agree with OGNorCal707's post: important to maintain good, manly body language but not rigid either.

Just being on my own and relaxed gets me an average of 2 girl cold approaches per night: nothing crazy, usually 7-8ish girls. My point is that if a girl likes your looks, you are more approachable when you are alone.

I usually integrate at least one mixed set early in the night, so as to have to people to catch up later in the night: chatting up guys is fun. I make people talk of what they like and commit to remember their name. Guys might have a girl friends that join them later too or invite you to their plans (another club, private parties, etc...).

Also, I am a smoker, so spend a lot of my time on the terrace/smoking area. Even if I have a lighter, asking for light to a hot girl who is smoking is natural and a quick way to probe her interest. English is not my first language, so they sometimes notice my accent and start asking where I am from: easy way to start a convo. As an aside, I don't give cigs away too easily when asked, in particular to HBs who assume it's natural that men do and give what they want, pretending some silly rule about that. As a bonus, it looks as though as I was rejecting her to people around. I prefer giving some to cool guys: they can offer drinks and introduce to their girl friends.

Agree with PDX on sobriety level: later in the night people get drunk. Drunk men desperately approach women completely trashed. It is easier to stand out at that point really. Earlier in the night, around 10ish, if it's quiet I talk with the bartenders. I avoid speaking to negative or people with no vibe or energy and walk away from people who have relational issues.

And a big thanks to Roosh for his line "I have no friends". It always amazes girls.

Going out Solo - BadgerHut - 10-02-2011

Quote: (09-30-2011 07:46 AM)isis Wrote:

I went out with a friend, not really a wingman, more of a AFC himself.

I used to go clubbing a few years back, mostly it was all about getting wasted,

Tonight, for the first time I felt I had inner game: I wasn't caught up in the music or the atmosphere, I knew what I wanted, and let nothing shake me; at one point I was walking across the dance floor to get to the other side, when "shorty it's your birthday" was playing, this cute chick maybe a 7 was in my way, she kept dancing, I tried to go around, kept dancing, when I finally politely shuffled around her, she bumped into me by on purpose, for the first time I was the one in control.

I thought to myself, "I don't really want to dance, all I want to get you in bed", am I anti game?

Congratulations dude, that's a hell of a threshold to cross. It's like a quarterback when he gets it and all of a sudden the game "slows down" for him.

Going out Solo - WesternCancer - 10-03-2011

When I was starting out I would prefer to go with a group of friends and break off from there doing my own thing. I look back on it now and they were just there to fall back on if I got shut down SAD. Now I'll go out with one or two guys or maybe a girl and a guy maybe 2 guys and a girl no more than 4 (3 guys 1 girl max). Its always good if they aren't horrific at game so once you close on one girl you can rejoin their group and meet anyone they might have met.

I go to a lot of house parties or dorm parties so its better to roll up with either a few people that know everyone or know a few people at each party.

Going out Solo - KingofScotland - 10-03-2011

I will do almost anything alone everything from cinema to travelling the world and don't even mind going for a quick beer by myself during the day if I'm out and about and fancy one but going out at night to bars and clubs alone just doesn't appeal. I wouldn't be able to get in that fun, social mood, would feel really awkard and would just end up drinking too quickly and ending up drunk. I primarily like to go out at night to have a bit of a chat & a laugh with my mates and everything else is a bonus, spending a whole night in a bar or club alone would lead to extreme drunkeness, boredom or frustration for me. Respect to all those who can do it though.