How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Printable Version

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

You want to sleep with certain girl you really want, maybe string her along afterwards, who knows maybe she can become your GF. You're trying to sweep her off her feet. However you're competing with typical clean cut guy who's courting her, playing nice guy card, inviting to dinners, etc. He's not super lame ass video game geek chump, he's just just regular clean cut button down shirt plain guy who offers stability and comfort.

She likes both of you.

You give her thrills but she's still careful, on the fence and doesn't give in, you see something's wrong or missing. He's good bf material on paper but she's still playing hard to get, leading him on, which is frustrating but he doesn't know any other way so he keeps trying the same thing. Time is ticking away...

What do you do to outgame him and be the first?



** DISCLAIMER: ANY KIND OF "NEXT HER" ANSWER DOES NOT COUNT **

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Dalaran1991 - 11-24-2016

This coming from XXL ? How to compete with a beta provider?



April 1st comes early / too late?

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Rocha - 11-24-2016

Buy her dinners too and do not be lame like him. Have all of his qualities and more.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - brokinetic - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 08:51 AM)XXL Wrote:  

You want to sleep with certain girl you really want, maybe string her along afterwards, who knows maybe she can become your GF. You're trying to sweep her off her feet. However you're competing with typical clean cut guy who's courting her, playing nice guy card, inviting to dinners, etc. He's rather lame but offers stability and comfort. You know the type.

She likes both of you.

You give her thrills but she's still careful, on the fence and doesn't give in, you see something's wrong or missing. He's good bf material on paper but she's still playing hard to get, leading him on, which is frustrating but he doesn't know any other way so he keeps trying the same thing. Time is ticking away...

What do you do to outgame him and be the first?



** DISCLAIMER: ANY KIND OF "NEXT HER" ANSWER DOES NOT COUNT **

This looks like a good prologue to a novel on seduction and game.

PS : I sensing something hidden here

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

I'm not asking for advice HOW TO DO IT, I'm asking HOW YOU GUYS DO IT.

This is tricky question.

First of all, usually we do not compete with other players, we compete with regular orbiter guys who are just there orbiting trying to be girl's BF. All of us lost girls to guys like these, some of us just do not know it.

Second of all, if doing your usual player thing doesn't work then doing the same thing but more or harder is not the solution, obviously. But she will fuck someone so there is a way.

Third of all, when I go against a guy who provides something different than me and both of us get nothing in return it gets me thinking.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - JoeSea - 11-24-2016

The question here would be if you present a clear and definite separation of yourself from this so called "nice/safe guy". That you represent fun and excitement where he represents safety and stability. If so then I would say the strategy should be to remain patient and wait it out, b/c at some point she will get bored and want excitement.

All the while you make sure she's getting a steady dose of the fact that you're not just sitting around like some lame. That you're out living life, having fun. Continuing to create a clear separation between yourself and what you bring to the table and the nice guy who we all know will get on her nerves at some point as he continues to play it safe.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - S3K2 - 11-24-2016

I was just in this position. What I did was turn her into a slow simmer (yes let the orbiter try and work his magic) went aloof and spoke to other girls. Came back 15 mins later dropped some beta bait prior to a cocky routine. Left agian (trying to get her to chase me) came back with some light kino and more beta bait and that pretty much sealed the deal. This was all done while the orbiter was standing there next to her. No snl but got her out the next day and obtained the bang. Due to the majority girls here in the west who claim "just looking for something serious" i.e. a LTR im finding beta bait to be more powerful than previously thought. (If used correctly)

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Dalaran1991 - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 09:40 AM)XXL Wrote:  

I'm not asking for advice HOW TO DO IT, I'm asking HOW YOU GUYS DO IT.

This is tricky question.

First of all, usually we do not compete with other players, we compete with regular orbiter guys who are just there orbiting trying to be girl's BF. All of us lost girls to guys like these, some of us just do not know it.

Second of all, if doing your usual player thing doesn't work then doing the same thing but more or harder is not the solution, obviously. But she will fuck someone so there is a way.

Third of all, when I go against a guy who provides something different than me and both of us get nothing in return it gets me thinking.

I fully acknowledge the phenomenon, but I would hardly call it a loss for two reasons:

1. If the girl eventually settles down with a beta provider she is not lost to you. You always have a window to fuck her later even while she s still with him. You have certainly slept with girls in a happy LTR before, girls whom you've known for a while.

2.

Quote:Quote:

Third of all, when I go against a guy who provides something different than me and both of us get nothing in return it gets me thinking.

You might get nothing but you also lose nothing, save maybe some time/effort? He lost A LOT of time, effort, mental energy, shit ton of $$$$, maybe his honor (I see any type of supplicating to a woman as a disgrace) and all for maybe one fuck with her, and at best a LTR with him where she will surely cuckold him with someone else (maybe even you?)

No loss for you, BIG loss for him. This is like a girl I gamed once, just told her "come have a drink, I'll make your PG-13 life less boring". She came, then as we chit chat she told me about these guys who spend all crazy $$ to invite her to expensive concert and still get nothing. I lost 4 euros and get to kiss her and massage her boobs. Sure she is hot but if someone wanna spend more time and effort than I did to get that I'll happily step aside.

But I digest, let's talk real strategy:

One of the best thing I learned it game is "girls just want to have fun". Thats our competitive edge against the regular guys, because we are fun. Beta provider are boring. Stability and security are desirable, but they are boring.

Quote:Quote:

You give her thrills but she's still careful, on the fence and doesn't give in, you see something's wrong or missing.

This is where it gets interesting. Maybe your type of thrill doesn't excite her?

It takes lots of calibrating and intuition to read a chick. I know the frustration of not being able to read one, while homies WIA can careen around snooping in every dark corners of a girl's mind.

One tactic that works for me is to throw in some heavy contrast.

So you invite her out, pull your standard game and she doesn't hook? Suddenly throw back that aloof and fun mask and be the caring guy, and escort her home, arms in arms. Then all of a sudden slam her against the wall and make out. Try to pull away first, then walk away with a simple "Good night". This worked for me twice when I had trouble.

Ask her about her family and upbringing. This usually gives you a lot of info about her as a person. Get as deep and personal as you can. I find that usually each girls have a hung up male figure of obsession in her life (father, ex, brother, even a teacher she admired) and if you can draw from that energy you would be golden. Lots of fine-tuning but I find this fun.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:16 AM)JoeSea Wrote:  

The question here would be if you present a clear and definite separation of yourself from this so called "nice/safe guy". That you represent fun and excitement where he represents safety and stability. If so then I would say the strategy should be to remain patient and wait it out, b/c at some point she will get bored and want excitement.

I see your point, thing is, the big questions is how to the first. Once she's heavily involved emotionally with her BF it can take a long time before she starts opening up to different guys due to boredom.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:22 AM)S3K2 Wrote:  

I was just in this position. What I did was turn her into a slow simmer (yes let the orbiter try and work his magic) went aloof and spoke to other girls. Came back 15 mins later dropped some beta bait prior to a cocky routine. Left agian (trying to get her to chase me) came back with some light kino and more beta bait and that pretty much sealed the deal. This was all done while the orbiter was standing there next to her. No snl but got her out the next day and obtained the bang. Due to the majority girls here in the west who claim "just looking for something serious" i.e. a LTR im finding beta bait to be more powerful than previously thought. (If used correctly)

She took the bait. What would you do if she didn't?

Can you explain what's "beta bait"?

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:35 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Quote: (11-24-2016 09:40 AM)XXL Wrote:  

I'm not asking for advice HOW TO DO IT, I'm asking HOW YOU GUYS DO IT.

This is tricky question.

First of all, usually we do not compete with other players, we compete with regular orbiter guys who are just there orbiting trying to be girl's BF. All of us lost girls to guys like these, some of us just do not know it.

Second of all, if doing your usual player thing doesn't work then doing the same thing but more or harder is not the solution, obviously. But she will fuck someone so there is a way.

Third of all, when I go against a guy who provides something different than me and both of us get nothing in return it gets me thinking.

I fully acknowledge the phenomenon, but I would hardly call it a loss for two reasons:

1. If the girl eventually settles down with a beta provider she is not lost to you. You always have a window to fuck her later even while she s still with him. You have certainly slept with girls in a happy LTR before, girls whom you've known for a while.

Hmm I guess I'm motivated more by winning with the guy than the girl herself. My whole question is how to get the girl FIRST.

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:35 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

You might get nothing but you also lose nothing, save maybe some time/effort? He lost A LOT of time, effort, mental energy, shit ton of $$$$, maybe his honor (I see any type of supplicating to a woman as a disgrace) and all for maybe one fuck with her, and at best a LTR with him where she will surely cuckold him with someone else (maybe even you?)

No loss for you, BIG loss for him. This is like a girl I gamed once, just told her "come have a drink, I'll make your PG-13 life less boring". She came, then as we chit chat she told me about these guys who spend all crazy $$ to invite her to expensive concert and still get nothing. I lost 4 euros and get to kiss her and massage her boobs. Sure she is hot but if someone wanna spend more time and effort than I did to get that I'll happily step aside.

So you won there. That's the thing I'm talking about. There are some chicks that don't fall for fun/sexy game but on the other hand they make nice/safe guys courting them go through hell as well. There must be a way god dammit

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:35 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

Quote:Quote:

You give her thrills but she's still careful, on the fence and doesn't give in, you see something's wrong or missing.

This is where it gets interesting. Maybe your type of thrill doesn't excite her?

It takes lots of calibrating and intuition to read a chick. I know the frustration of not being able to read one, while homies WIA can careen around snooping in every dark corners of a girl's mind.

Could be. I remember how frustrating it was back in the days when cute girls were hanging around those lame average dudes that bored me to death but when I talked to them they were friendly yet rather suspicious. As if I was about to hurt them in some kind of way. I was fun then, a lot, but it wasn't that right type of fun.

Quote: (11-24-2016 10:35 AM)Dalaran1991 Wrote:  

One tactic that works for me is to throw in some heavy contrast.

So you invite her out, pull your standard game and she doesn't hook? Suddenly throw back that aloof and fun mask and be the caring guy, and escort her home, arms in arms. Then all of a sudden slam her against the wall and make out. Try to pull away first, then walk away with a simple "Good night". This worked for me twice when I had trouble.

Ask her about her family and upbringing. This usually gives you a lot of info about her as a person. Get as deep and personal as you can. I find that usually each girls have a hung up male figure of obsession in her life (father, ex, brother, even a teacher she admired) and if you can draw from that energy you would be golden. Lots of fine-tuning but I find this fun.

Good old mixed signals. Good call Mr. D.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - S3K2 - 11-24-2016

She didn't bite at first. It wasn't until my 3rd pass she reciprocated some light kino which I charge to beta bait. Well my definition of beta bait is feeding hamsters the bad boyfriend ploy. An exact example I used that night was "it's so hard to find a quality girl now a days". And thats fucking it! Any more than one line of betaness will alert her spider senses that your beta. But just a small one liner as so is enough to put her hamster in over drive. Shes thinking, damn he's so touchy feely and cocky but comes out and says that shit up there. I'm not horny right now but he's intriguing and I want to get to know more of him". I'm pretty sure thats what was going through her head judgeing by the responses she was putting out. After the bang she said "so your looking for a gf right" I just lmao in my head and gave her the "grey area routine" compliments to ROK.

If she didn't bite, NEXT.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Mufasa - 11-24-2016

I just pulled this off last night. Out for drinks, we start talking about the night we bet and how her ride (nice guy) left her and he couldn't get in contact with her. Goes on about how she was mad at him and then she made him buy her pizza and when he tried to sleep with her she curved him to the couch. After our drinks she came home with me for some cake and the D (also of note my "cake routine" is now 3/3).

The way I play it is find a way to show that his beta provider shit is a joke thats getting him no where. She was aware of this and was just waiting to clown on homeboy as well. I believe I said "wow you made this sucker your bitch" and she laughed and agreed. I'll let him be the "free meal guy" and I just continue being the "sex guy".

PS: I would bet they're fucking, Hoes be Hoe'n. she was covered in red flags like a goddamn golf course.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Unchained - 11-24-2016

Just have sex with her first.... After you fuck her you can show nice guy/provider qualities to sell her the dream.

But be careful about going full asshole. I fucked many dude's girlfriends even when I was a "beta".

But once you fuck her you should be good to go. If she's a slut she might fuck both of you though in which case don't worry about it and charge it to the game. If she's just another notch who cares?

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

I guess I put the wrong title. The point of this thread is how to get a girl who seems resistant to your lover game and to others' provider game as well. Outgaming nice/safe guys is not a problem but what's the difference if he's out where you you still get nowhere ;/

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Stimulus - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 03:33 PM)XXL Wrote:  

I guess I put the wrong title. The point of this thread is how to get a girl who seems resistant to your lover game and to others' provider game as well. Outgaming nice/safe guys is not a problem but what's the difference if he's out where you you still get nowhere ;/

I guess some people didn't read your post. It's pretty obvious where you're going with your question.

My game aswell as my experience aren't even close to the level of me having a good answer/solution regarding this situation.

I am however VERY curious about how the veterans like WIA, kaotic, Gio etcetera would handle this.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

OK we have a winner.

Quote:WIA Wrote:

Basically the chick wants adventure from you, and stability from him.

Overall strategy - Push her towards that guy by extolling his great qualities.

1) Disqualify yourself - "you know it, and I know it, i'm bad news. We're going to fuck, and you're going to cry your eyes out"

2) Overqualify the other guy - "Derek? he's a great guy, he's got everything going for him. He's going to provide a good life for you, marriage, children babies. He's nice to you. He'll do everything for you...." Run down the list of stable beta provider traits that are socially approved - that are also proven to turn girls off.

3) She's either going to dis him, and say he's not that nice. Or she's going to entirely believe you, and realize that's not what she wants.

So...

Basically, it such situation the girl is playing every guy talking to her [including me] cause she enjoys the attention and wants to get a bit of everything. So as long as every guy continues to do what he's doing she's satisfied. That means that pattern has to broken. Fast.

To win the game is not to play.

However I cannot turn into fucking shmuck which means I gotta do what I do, but a bit differently. Instead of pumping her emotions in entertaining way I gotta go more cruel and push her buttons. Not playing here means to disqualify yourself hard to make her feel not wanted so she feels the need to chase the validation back. Then to use infamous boyfriend destroyers to put an idea in her head against her will [full inception mode] that she's actually put off by him.

How to disqualify:
+ We would fight like cats and dogs and I would always win
+ I'm looking for a sugar mommy, I'd spend all your cash and never do shit for you
+ You’re too much of a good girl for me….and you wouldn't take my shit I wouldn't take yours
+ I'm sure there are tons of guys dying to meet you on the internet…
+ Chill out I'm not for you, stop trying and just be cool
+ You’re really cute… Too bad your not my type
+ You can so help me pick up chicks…Get your ass over here I want a hug ….Ok get off me, you will scare away all the hot chicks.

Then we add Boyfriend destroyers. It's all about discrediting other guy's game [especially when he's playing the potential BF card] by pointing out his flaws in a very sneaky way, and those are jealousy, neediness, failure to commit, abusive behavior, lack of passion.

Quote:Tyler D. Wrote:

That being said, u should NEVER EVER speak badly about the BF that will only get the HB in a defensive and aggressive state and u will be bringing them closer together. Instead u speak highly of him describe him as being the most perfect man/BF in the world then something strange will happen she will start disqualifying him(don't worry if she only says one bad thing it's enough) that's when u resist the urge to Disqualify him again and u DEFEND him in a way making him the insecure person in the hole world, u need to go total AFC to do this.

Jealousy:
"You have to understand that this guy really appreciates you, because you're probably the best girl that he ever got, or ever will get. I know that... you care about this guy (maybe sp)... but there's just a certain equilibrium where if you've done this guy a favour by being with him and he's not equipped to handle it, since he knows that he'll never get a girl like you again if he walks out, that he's just constantly frustrated and panicked that you'll leave. It's not his fault.

Neediness:
"You've got to understand that for this guy you are his entire world. He cares about you so much, that everything else in the world is meaningless to him. You are his only source of pleasure, and without you he knows that. ..he's nothing. You can't blame him, he just doesn't have anything else going for him, so he needs you."

Failure to commit:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that deep down he has a fear that... you're too good for him... and that you'll realize it and be like, you know....you just have to dump this guy.... and then he'll be left emotionally destroyed because he made himself vulnerable. Yes yes I know that you wouldn't do that to him, but its just that with he knows that you could get other guys (SP)...like me...I just think that he's not an emotionally secure person, and you've gotta cut him some slack."

Abusive behaviour:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. Its that he loves you too much, and just can't handle it. He's not emotionally available, and because he knows that you're the best he's ever had, he can't handle all of these things that he's going through emotionally. All his life he probably wasn't very good with women, and women weren't interested in him.. So now that he's got this girl, he doesn't know how to handle it.

Being too predictable, not passionate:
"Its not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that he's so comfortable with you now.. and feels so close to you, that you're more like a sister to him.. Like a special sister, but someone who he doesn't feel that he has to do all these things for anymore, because your relationship is so secure and so predictable.. there's no need for all that excitement, because he knows that nothing will change.. Some guys deal with true love that way.. I dunno, for me, I think that if you really love someone, you have to keep it fresh. But really, its not that he doesn't love you, its just that he loves you so much that he doesn't see the need."

That brought back some memories.. I love the game

Thank you very much for attention.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Cobra - 11-24-2016

Are you trying to fuck her or buy her a ring? That would be the first thing in the decison tree from my perspective. If anywhere close to the latter, yes you are competing for being the "better beta." Not the ideal position to be in unless you're looking to settle down.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Kieran - 11-24-2016

In these situations, the girl has both men exactly where she wants them, and has become the player. I'd freeze her out and starve her of all the flirting and giving her the emotions she likes feeling, and perhaps try and show some pre-selection if possible, in order to try and turn the tables and get her chasing me. Investing, even in a player way, puts you in a shitty position where she feels she's already got you.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - James Bond Next level - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 03:33 PM)XXL Wrote:  

I guess I put the wrong title. The point of this thread is how to get a girl who seems resistant to your lover game and to others' provider game as well. Outgaming nice/safe guys is not a problem but what's the difference if he's out where you you still get nowhere ;/

Do I smell Oneitis? Careful mon ami... Anyway, if you want a more taylored answer, we are looking for much more details on your "lover game" and about this girl : does she (or do you think) usually dates players/nice guy/...?
But on the top on my hand, you can use:
-Yes good old push-pull.
-Preselection. How about adding some distance with her and let her see you talking to a "friend" or yours and stuff.
-If you run big asshole game, maybe she craves the fun but is worried there isn't much more. So use plenty of cocky&funny and at some point show her another side of you: clever, well-versed in the world and people, etc. Basically engage a more intelligent conversation on serious questions. Not for long, just so she wants to know more.
-Disqualify yourself a bit. Seems you and "beta man" are both a bit too hooked on her. You're playing by her rules, that's why you aren't getting some. Time to get her to play by your rules, bring out the alpha. Make yourself less available, joke about you being not good enough for her because you snore/love pokemon/whatever. Furthermore, tell her that in any case, she already got beta man 24/7 to pay for everything and that you think he has already planned his proposal and you're sure he's gonna be a wonderful stay-at-home dad. Yep, you just destroyed his value you lucky bastard

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Mufasa - 11-24-2016

Deleted my comment because I was way off base..

Quote: (11-24-2016 04:21 PM)XXL Wrote:  

OK we have a winner.

Quote:WIA Wrote:

Basically the chick wants adventure from you, and stability from him.

Overall strategy - Push her towards that guy by extolling his great qualities.

1) Disqualify yourself - "you know it, and I know it, i'm bad news. We're going to fuck, and you're going to cry your eyes out"

2) Overqualify the other guy - "Derek? he's a great guy, he's got everything going for him. He's going to provide a good life for you, marriage, children babies. He's nice to you. He'll do everything for you...." Run down the list of stable beta provider traits that are socially approved - that are also proven to turn girls off.

3) She's either going to dis him, and say he's not that nice. Or she's going to entirely believe you, and realize that's not what she wants.

So...

Basically, it such situation the girl is playing every guy talking to her [including me] cause she enjoys the attention and wants to get a bit of everything. So as long as every guy continues to do what he's doing she's satisfied. That means that pattern has to broken. Fast.

To win the game is not to play.

However I cannot turn into fucking shmuck which means I gotta do what I do, but a bit differently. Instead of pumping her emotions in entertaining way I gotta go more cruel and push her buttons. Not playing here means to disqualify yourself hard to make her feel not wanted so she feels the need to chase the validation back. Then to use infamous boyfriend destroyers to put an idea in her head against her will [full inception mode] that she's actually put off by him.

How to disqualify:
+ We would fight like cats and dogs and I would always win
+ I'm looking for a sugar mommy, I'd spend all your cash and never do shit for you
+ You’re too much of a good girl for me….and you wouldn't take my shit I wouldn't take yours
+ I'm sure there are tons of guys dying to meet you on the internet…
+ Chill out I'm not for you, stop trying and just be cool
+ You’re really cute… Too bad your not my type
+ You can so help me pick up chicks…Get your ass over here I want a hug ….Ok get off me, you will scare away all the hot chicks.

Then we add Boyfriend destroyers. It's all about discrediting other guy's game [especially when he's playing the potential BF card] by pointing out his flaws in a very sneaky way, and those are jealousy, neediness, failure to commit, abusive behavior, lack of passion.

Quote:Tyler D. Wrote:

That being said, u should NEVER EVER speak badly about the BF that will only get the HB in a defensive and aggressive state and u will be bringing them closer together. Instead u speak highly of him describe him as being the most perfect man/BF in the world then something strange will happen she will start disqualifying him(don't worry if she only says one bad thing it's enough) that's when u resist the urge to Disqualify him again and u DEFEND him in a way making him the insecure person in the hole world, u need to go total AFC to do this.

Jealousy:
"You have to understand that this guy really appreciates you, because you're probably the best girl that he ever got, or ever will get. I know that... you care about this guy (maybe sp)... but there's just a certain equilibrium where if you've done this guy a favour by being with him and he's not equipped to handle it, since he knows that he'll never get a girl like you again if he walks out, that he's just constantly frustrated and panicked that you'll leave. It's not his fault.

Neediness:
"You've got to understand that for this guy you are his entire world. He cares about you so much, that everything else in the world is meaningless to him. You are his only source of pleasure, and without you he knows that. ..he's nothing. You can't blame him, he just doesn't have anything else going for him, so he needs you."

Failure to commit:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that deep down he has a fear that... you're too good for him... and that you'll realize it and be like, you know....you just have to dump this guy.... and then he'll be left emotionally destroyed because he made himself vulnerable. Yes yes I know that you wouldn't do that to him, but its just that with he knows that you could get other guys (SP)...like me...I just think that he's not an emotionally secure person, and you've gotta cut him some slack."

Abusive behaviour:
"It's not that this guy doesn't love you. Its that he loves you too much, and just can't handle it. He's not emotionally available, and because he knows that you're the best he's ever had, he can't handle all of these things that he's going through emotionally. All his life he probably wasn't very good with women, and women weren't interested in him.. So now that he's got this girl, he doesn't know how to handle it.

Being too predictable, not passionate:
"Its not that this guy doesn't love you. He does. Its just that he's so comfortable with you now.. and feels so close to you, that you're more like a sister to him.. Like a special sister, but someone who he doesn't feel that he has to do all these things for anymore, because your relationship is so secure and so predictable.. there's no need for all that excitement, because he knows that nothing will change.. Some guys deal with true love that way.. I dunno, for me, I think that if you really love someone, you have to keep it fresh. But really, its not that he doesn't love you, its just that he loves you so much that he doesn't see the need."

That brought back some memories.. I love the game

Thank you very much for attention.

Yalls game is on some other shit man. You gotta have some experience to realize all of those things from analyzing the situation. Needless to say I'll have an idea of how to be prepared if this happens now. I actually have a girl doing this shit RIGHT NOW. lol. going to put this into practice asap.

So question for XXL and WIA, can these disqualifiers be executed via text message convo or are they only effective face to face? And how do I bring up the other guy without coming across as needy?

Thanks XXL, great post.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Gorgiass - 11-24-2016

Nice guy with an edge seems to be the most effective way for me to get a higher quality/non-slut into bed. Not buying dinners, pre bang at least, but certainly drinks and even apps...and displaying other traits that nice guys have. Being a multidimensional guy - well versed in intellectual topics, affectionate (not overbearingly so of course) mixed with my background in construction, an occasional slap on the ass and what nice guys would consider a hard tease. Dig the classic PUA style ones above.

I'm a fan of keeping them guessing. Everything she "discovers" that is contrary to her initial impression can be a turn on, generally. You approach directly and she knows you're a confident guy and likely player but then you get her alone and open up about how you trained classical piano for years growing up and lived in your cars for months after moving to X city for example. Then when she gets the sweet "aww" look in her eyes you break that rapport - grab her by the back of the hair seductively, deep eye contact then release with a slight push and chuckle or whatever. Then fluff talk, then get her to reveal and so on.

Assuming this isn't purely hypothetical, is this a girl from work or social circle? I ask because a guy with your qualifications would likely have gotten her out and physically escalated to closure via bang or rejection if there weren't other obstacles preventing this.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 04:35 PM)Mufasa Wrote:  

Yalls game is on some other shit man. You gotta have some experience to realize all of those things from analyzing the situation. Needless to say I'll have an idea of how to be prepared if this happens now. I actually have a girl doing this shit RIGHT NOW. lol. going to put this into practice asap.

So question for XXL and WIA, can these disqualifiers be executed via text message convo or are they only effective face to face? And how do I bring up the other guy without coming across as needy?

Thanks XXL, great post.

Yeah I had SOME [hehe] experiences, I'm guessing WIA wasn't born yesterday either

It all comes from first hand experiences. That's how we learn right? By doing what we read about. That's the beauty of game, you can read some shit and then materialize it in real life and then guess what, you looking at this perfect ass from behind and you can't believe you're inside it just because you used what you learned by stumbling upon some articles on internet by accident. That's how it started.

Can these disqualifiers be executed via text message convo or are they only effective face to face?

It can be used anywhere you want. It actually depends on you because those lines and scripts will evoke emotions and provoke certain responses, often automatic ones. So if don't think fast on your feet and have something to say to the girl's response then I think it's better to use those in text at first since you have more time to respond there and you're not put on the spot right?

In some way it's actually very beneficial to text some of those as girl can then read it again and again as she goes through the texting messages with you. Girls do it like that.

Disqualifying is like negging but more subtle and sneaky. You pull away validation. Not even in direct way by dismissing her but by letting her know you don't want her and you do it ON YOUR TERMS. That's why it's cool. You're not rejected. She think she's in the game waiting for you to chase her ass and beat her shittests and all of a sudden you're rejecting yourself as if you saw something in her that you hate. You snip this nice warm thrills of validation she's feeling inside. You create a vacuum between you and her this way. There's a tension in the air then. Yet you're still there in front of her talking flirting teasing negging disqualifying push/pulling touching etc so the source of validation is still right next to her [or one call away]. So she feels this tension in the air, she feel invalidated and she has a chance to get it back. That's how she starts investing. The more she invests the more wants it and she's in that spiral hardcore. The final validation step is your 8===D.

And how do I bring up the other guy without coming across as needy?

I don't really understand this question. You do it casually, like you're commenting something on TV. For example, a girl mentions a guy and you go "oh yeah i heard about him we have some mutual friends, you're in great hands but I kind of feel sorry for you at the same time". she of course go "what? why?". you say "ah nothing it's just you have no idea how this guy appreciates you, you're probably the best girl that he ever got, or ever will get. if you do him a favor by being with him he might not be able to handle it, since he knows that he'll never get a girl like you, i'm guessing he might be constantly frustrated and panicked that you'll leave him, i mean it's not his fault, he's crazy about you as far as I know, I just don't think it's healthy.. just saying. But don't worry love conquers all so all is good. Oh look, have you ever seen.. [you change topic so that she has no time to process it in her head which will cause her to process it later on her own where she will add her own thoughts to it and it will snowball into this big fucking problem in her head and attach it to him]."

Something like that. If you don't know the guy then let her speak a bit about him so that you can pinpoint his weaknesses and comment on that. So in that case this comment would look like this:

...a girl mentions a guy and you go "really? no way.. i know those i had few friends like him, you're in great hands but I kind of feel sorry for you at the same time"...

So you don't 'prepare' her for your spiel. You just throw it out there when she starts talking about different guy and you tell her that in matter of fact way, no excitement or anything

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - XXL - 11-24-2016

Quote: (11-24-2016 04:56 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:  

Nice guy with an edge seems to be the most effective way for me to get a higher quality/non-slut into bed. Not buying dinners, pre bang at least, but certainly drinks and even apps...and displaying other traits that nice guys have. Being a multidimensional guy - well versed in intellectual topics, affectionate (not overbearingly so of course) mixed with my background in construction, an occasional slap on the ass and what nice guys would consider a hard tease. Dig the classic PUA style ones above.

I get what you mean. Question is how to stand out when others are like that as well?

Quote: (11-24-2016 04:56 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:  

I'm a fan of keeping them guessing. Everything she "discovers" that is contrary to her initial impression can be a turn on, generally. You approach directly and she knows you're a confident guy and likely player but then you get her alone and open up about how you trained classical piano for years growing up and lived in your cars for months after moving to X city for example. Then when she gets the sweet "aww" look in her eyes you break that rapport - grab her by the back of the hair seductively, deep eye contact then release with a slight push and chuckle or whatever. Then fluff talk, then get her to reveal and so on.

Good old mixed signals that never fails. Always keep them guessing

Quote: (11-24-2016 04:56 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:  

Assuming this isn't purely hypothetical, is this a girl from work or social circle? I ask because a guy with your qualifications would likely have gotten her out and physically escalated to closure via bang or rejection if there weren't other obstacles preventing this.

Yes, she is from social circle. Her and few others I failed with so far. That's how I know some details who games them, if they sleep with someone, etc.

I did all of it already and believe it or not I could not close the deal. It was very surprising to me. I had very clean shot, logistics handled, fun mood, afterparty, booze, everything was like perfect. Still nothing. Maybe it was too perfect. I didn't burn the bridges but I was taken aback. That's why I made this thread. I thought "wtf is wrong? what do they want then?".

Now I know that I might have overgamed and overwhelmed them, like, too much, too intense. With those girls it was like boom boom boom, always on point, calculated to the max, almost like too smooth. Most importantly they didn't invest anything. I didn't step back at all. It was step forward, step forward, step forward. They were just on receiving end all the time as I was too happy running my game on them. After WIA messaged me I'm thinking that's the reason.

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How do you compete with nice/safe guy courting the girl you want? - Kieran - 11-25-2016

I know it's not what people want to hear when they've already invested some effort, but it's much easier to just use the effort on a new girl at this stage. If I'm thinking how to get a girl, how to course correct, etc., then if I'm honest with myself, I know I've already lost her by caring too much (thought I'd never be in that situation again, but fell into it again recently after almost a decade of being pretty icey). If you can really remain detached and continue, then there's no harm, but often these are the girls that get you psychologically (it's our own tricks, getting her to invest so that she starts feeling something, being used on us, and it works).

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