Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Printable Version
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Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
lol so my girlfriend of 1 month got pissed at me today for a comment I had made through text.
Here is what the convo said:
Me: Good morning, hope you slept well last night
Her: Good morning! It was okay, it was hard to sleep. I think I have too much stuff in my head (I received this same text three times.. it happens sometimes on the Android when texting an iPhone user)
Me: *sends her a screenshot of the triple text* I can see that. Duly noted.
Her: Hahaha stupid iPhone
Her: I don't have that much going on up there lol
Me: Uh huh
![[Image: wink.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/wink.gif)
if you say so...Her: Funny.. but I'm sure you're not trying to date a crazy girl. Unless you want to, I can be crazy.
Me: I've never met a sane woman in my life
Me: I don't know if you have plans later this afternoon but let me know if you'd like to watch a movie with me
Me: Scratch that. Movies in theaters are wack as fuck.
Her: Wow, totally offended. Thanks jackass. I'll talk to you later. (late response from her)
lol.. I don't think my comment was rude at all. I'm pretty sure she's pissy about the text I bolded (probably not about me rescinding my offer for the movie) but honestly I've said way more outlandish shit than that to her in the past. Anyways, I find this whole thing rather amusing. I didn't text her back.
My question is, am I wrong saying that or is she simply shit testing me to get a reaction? I have a gut feeling she wants me to apologize, which is giving her exactly what she wants. I've already been angry at her once during this early phase of our relationship and laid down the law when I needed to. I feel as if she's just looking for a trivial reason to "get mad" at me.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - iknowexactly - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 04:51 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
lol so my girlfriend of 1 month got pissed at me today for a comment I had made through text.
noted.
Her: Hahaha stupid iPhone
Her: I don't have that much going on up there lol
Me: Uh huh
Her: Funny.. but I'm sure you're not trying to date a crazy girl. Unless you want to, I can be crazy.
Me: I've never met a sane woman in my life
lol.. I don't think my comment was rude at all.
i'm a beta type, so take this for what it's worth--
1) You sent her three texts in a row, the first of which is the insulting one. Since you didn't give her a chance to respond,
if she's irritated and you say something else she doesn't like, it's a one-two blow, hard to recover from-- and it makes you look needy to send multiple texts when she's not answering.
2) I think the "never met" statement is rude, you out of hand imply SHE'S insane right after she states that she's not so you're disregarding what she claimed. It also frames you as someone that really doesn't like or trust women too much. It's distancing (reminding someone you don't want to be close to them or trust them) and a microaggression. Maybe not even that micro.
SHe flirtatiously gave you a chance to start sexy-time by stating that she can get crazy and you shut that down instead of taking advantage to shift things to sexual.
DURING HOT SEX sexual women like to be regarded as and cruelly/coldly used as fucktoys, but in times they're trying to have some kind of bond with you they're not. As an aside wack is peasant/ghetto speak, fine if you're trying to come off like that, just that you should be aware of it.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - LEMONed IScream - 03-27-2013
LOL I would scratch her at the very same moment.
"kkthx bye bitch"
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - guerrilla - 03-27-2013
Wait a couple days then pretend it never happened the next time you talk to her
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - texas - 03-27-2013
Just change whatever her name is in your phone to "time to find a sexier girl" or "reject this call." Then go and find some new girls and when she messages/calls you again, her new info shows up and you know who's boss. That problem solved itself.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - WesternCancer - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 04:51 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
lol so my girlfriend of 1 month got pissed at me today for a comment I had made through text.
Here is what the convo said:
*first interaction of the day*Me: Good morning, hope you slept well last night
Your problem is in bold. You're way too invested.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - BurnFirst - 03-27-2013
Comments like that are better delivered in person I think.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - aphelion - 03-27-2013
That's just daft really. Don't throw out an idea and then reel it back. You did the following consecutively:
Negged her without the makeup afterward ('but I dig crazy chicks')
Offered a date
Rejected the date immediately afterward
She doesn't understand that you changed your mind about the actual movie, she thinks that you don't want to hang out with her. You screwed the pooch on this one.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 06:24 PM)WesternCancer Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 04:51 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
lol so my girlfriend of 1 month got pissed at me today for a comment I had made through text.
Here is what the convo said:
*first interaction of the day*Me: Good morning, hope you slept well last night
Your problem is in bold. You're way too invested.
I highly doubt that. I send her a good morning text maybe once a week. Normally she is the first one to initiate conversation during the majority of the days. Gotta throw a girl a bone sometimes.
She came over on Monday and had an *imagined* feeling in which she thought she was being a bitch to me. I thought everything was perfectly normal. The next day, she sends me this email out of no where:
Quote:Quote:
I am writing you in regard to the events that transpired last night. I truly apologize for my ludicrous behavior. It was absolutely uncalled for and there are no excuses for me to be a grumpy old fart because I was tired. I completely understand if you are not fond of me at this very moment but hope you will forgive me soon. When you no longer find the urge to sucker-punch me, give me a wet-willy, or give me a wedgey, please feel free to contact me via text or telephone. As for now, I will keep my distance and hope that you forgive me for being ridiculous.
I know I have hand in this relationship but I feel I may be in the wrong in this particular situation.. She's waiting for me to reach out to her. The question is, should I apologize or just brush it off?
I was thinking about sending her a text later tonight saying that she shouldn't take my jokes seriously. She should know by now that I am prone to saying outlandish things.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - scorpion - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 04:51 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
Me: Good morning, hope you slept well last night
![[Image: laugh2.gif]](https://rooshvforum.network/images/smilies/new/laugh2.gif)
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Titan - 03-27-2013
It sounds like you are speaking to your mother.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - teh_skeeze - 03-27-2013
I think you looked way to far into it. She ended the conversation with "talk to you later". The only mistake I see is that you didn't offer another idea after you shot down your own idea of a movie. If you are worried that a text you are sending an offensive text, use a smiley to show that you are being playful. Women can be dense sometimes.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:20 PM)teh_skeeze Wrote:
I think you looked way to far into it. She ended the conversation with "talk to you later". The only mistake I see is that you didn't offer another idea after you shot down your own idea of a movie. If you are worried that a text you are sending an offensive text, use a smiley to show that you are being playful. Women can be dense sometimes.
True. Text is easily misconstrued. If I said that in person, she would probably just give me a punch on the shoulder.
I realize now that I have to soften my negs when it comes to my girlfriend because she WILL take every little thing I say to heart. It's quite different when saying the same thing to a girl pre-bang.. much much different.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - guerrilla - 03-27-2013
Have you slept with her yet?
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Matt3B - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Dulceácido - 03-27-2013
Holy crap! Are we seeing the same girl? I had almost the exact same thing happen to me this week. Very similar circumstances, just change the topic and we were communicating by Skype.
She was talking about getting accepted into a program that would require her to leave town for quite a bit of time. She has a cat and basically expressed that she would need me to care for it while she was away. I don't like cats in my house. Other people's cats in their houses are great, but I don't like them in mine. She knows this fact very well.
Her: So if I get picked up for the program, you're gonna have to watch the fur ball...
Me: I equate owning a cat to having open boxes of shit in your home.
Her: Thanks a lot jerk! You don't have to be so rude! And for your information I don't own the cat because I like having open boxes of shit in the house! I have to go. I will talk to you later.
**Two days, radio silence**
I wasn't trying to be a dick or anything. I was just poking fun a little bit while making it clear that I will not be keeping her cat at my place and she should make other plans. She completely flips out.
So, I did like Guerilla suggested to you and after 2 days I made a mental note that she's a drama queen and easily offended by things that she reads as insulting over a medium where she can't see that I was smiling and playful when I said it and then I just sent her a message as if nothing ever even happened.
She wrote back a couple hours later and was very short and impersonal in her reply. No words of affection or anything, so I assume she's still outraged. Definitely not the kind of drama queen bullshit I am used to, nor will I tolerate. I think either it's a massive shit-test and a load of attention-seeking drama OR she has met or is interested in someone else and is intentionally trying to sabotage our relationship over some petty bullshit so she doesn't feel guilty creeping with some other dude while I am out of town.
We'll see how it develops. This seems like a typical modus operandi by females in general, though.
Women are evil. They will bring you down.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:36 PM)guerrilla Wrote:
Have you slept with her yet?
Yes.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Chewbacon - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Nah brah, you and a lot of guys on this thread on harping at the wrong thing. There was nothing wrong with his first text. Maybe the women u date have strong demand for alpha/hard game, but I think a customary "good morning, had a good sleep?" is fine in a relationship provided he is already banging the girl. Remember, a relationship implies the two of you are on the same team - much less need for a me vs. you confrontational dynamic.
Besides, I think OP was doing fine midway through this exchange. Him sending her a screenshot of her triple text is a subtle neg that digs at her insecurities. She responded positively by qualifying herself, saying she's not crazy, but she could be crazy if he wanted that. Lots of qualifying and implications that she is attracted enough to him for him to determine what he wants her to be.
The problem with OP's text is the last bit about "all women being crazy." I mean, that's just a really really bad neg. First, she's already qualified herself to you. Second, it's a flat out insult. Third, it implies the OP has insecurities about women. I remember Roissy and a lot of other respectable PUA bloggers mentioning that women don't want to be around men they think are resentful or angry or bitter towards women. This neg was harsh and all around disrespectful. A good neg, and good alpha game in general, is charming, disaffected, and playful.
As for the aftermath, I think OP should just let it breathe for a bit. Then maybe follow up with something low key. Don't hint at you doing anything wrong. Maybe use some "vulnerability game" along the lines of "I've dated some crazy girls, but I like you because you've got a good head on your shoulders."
Most importantly, remember that this guy is in a FRESH relationship. He's already bedded her (I'm assuming that), he's already got the power. He can easily lose that power, but a pleasant "good morning" is not what would cause it.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Yes, you're absolutely right. My game with her has been tight until today. I believe this is the first time she's been genuinely upset with me. As much as she hides it, she's falling for me deep. She definitely likes me more than I like her. She couldn't wait to introduce me to her friends/family and she pleases me like no other in the bedroom. Even though I know the fact that she's falling hard, I still keep the mentality that she'll be gone tomorrow and I'm okay with that.
She just hit me up again saying "It did bother me at first but I realized it was stupid of me to get mad over something so trivial."
Time to dead this moot argument.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Lemmo - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:29 PM)SHANbangs Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Nah brah, you and a lot of guys on this thread on harping at the wrong thing. There was nothing wrong with his first text. Maybe the women u date have strong demand for alpha/hard game, but I think a customary "good morning, had a good sleep?" is fine in a relationship provided he is already banging the girl. Remember, a relationship implies the two of you are on the same team - much less need for a me vs. you confrontational dynamic.
Besides, I think OP was doing fine midway through this exchange. Him sending her a screenshot of her triple text is a subtle neg that digs at her insecurities. She responded positively by qualifying herself, saying she's not crazy, but she could be crazy if he wanted that. Lots of qualifying and implications that she is attracted enough to him for him to determine what he wants her to be.
The problem with OP's text is the last bit about "all women being crazy." I mean, that's just a really really bad neg. First, she's already qualified herself to you. Second, it's a flat out insult. Third, it implies the OP has insecurities about women. I remember Roissy and a lot of other respectable PUA bloggers mentioning that women don't want to be around men they think are resentful or angry or bitter towards women. This neg was harsh and all around disrespectful. A good neg, and good alpha game in general, is charming, disaffected, and playful.
As for the aftermath, I think OP should just let it breathe for a bit. Then maybe follow up with something low key. Don't hint at you doing anything wrong. Maybe use some "vulnerability game" along the lines of "I've dated some crazy girls, but I like you because you've got a good head on your shoulders."
Most importantly, remember that this guy is in a FRESH relationship. He's already bedded her (I'm assuming that), he's already got the power. He can easily lose that power, but a pleasant "good morning" is not what would cause it.
Huh? You consider that a harsh neg? This isn't a stranger. He's been with her for a month. If a mild offhand comment like that, which is obviously a joke, results in a multi-day tantrum, he is obviously dealing with a loose cannon. She confirms as much with her multiple texts describing how "crazy" she is. This girl is obviously going to be a lot of make believe drama and she'll involve him in these dramas to the extent he continues to show a willingness to engage. That's why people are saying he needs to either cut her off or laugh off the nonsense. Otherwise, he is just spending time managing her nonsense (like he did in this case).
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Matt3B - 03-27-2013
Don't submit to the frame. Ignore it and text her back a few hours later with something completely unrelated like "get your silly ass round to watch this film".
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:29 PM)SHANbangs Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Nah brah, you and a lot of guys on this thread on harping at the wrong thing. There was nothing wrong with his first text. Maybe the women u date have strong demand for alpha/hard game, but I think a customary "good morning, had a good sleep?" is fine in a relationship provided he is already banging the girl. Remember, a relationship implies the two of you are on the same team - much less need for a me vs. you confrontational dynamic.
Besides, I think OP was doing fine midway through this exchange. Him sending her a screenshot of her triple text is a subtle neg that digs at her insecurities. She responded positively by qualifying herself, saying she's not crazy, but she could be crazy if he wanted that. Lots of qualifying and implications that she is attracted enough to him for him to determine what he wants her to be.
The problem with OP's text is the last bit about "all women being crazy." I mean, that's just a really really bad neg. First, she's already qualified herself to you. Second, it's a flat out insult. Third, it implies the OP has insecurities about women. I remember Roissy and a lot of other respectable PUA bloggers mentioning that women don't want to be around men they think are resentful or angry or bitter towards women. This neg was harsh and all around disrespectful. A good neg, and good alpha game in general, is charming, disaffected, and playful.
As for the aftermath, I think OP should just let it breathe for a bit. Then maybe follow up with something low key. Don't hint at you doing anything wrong. Maybe use some "vulnerability game" along the lines of "I've dated some crazy girls, but I like you because you've got a good head on your shoulders."
Most importantly, remember that this guy is in a FRESH relationship. He's already bedded her (I'm assuming that), he's already got the power. He can easily lose that power, but a pleasant "good morning" is not what would cause it.
I appreciate your input. You're absolutely right. I told her that I meant no disrespect with my comment. Yes, it did come off the wrong way.
Also, this girl is a 3rd world girl from Laos who came to the United States when she was young. She's a solid 6-7 in my book. She is Americanized but she still has that old school mentality in regards to relationships and pleasing her man to the fullest. That's a rarity these days.
I am definitely alpha towards her but there are times when I'll show my sweet side (but not too much). I know for a fact I have the upper hand in this relationship.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Knowledge Seeker - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:35 PM)Lemmo Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:29 PM)SHANbangs Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Nah brah, you and a lot of guys on this thread on harping at the wrong thing. There was nothing wrong with his first text. Maybe the women u date have strong demand for alpha/hard game, but I think a customary "good morning, had a good sleep?" is fine in a relationship provided he is already banging the girl. Remember, a relationship implies the two of you are on the same team - much less need for a me vs. you confrontational dynamic.
Besides, I think OP was doing fine midway through this exchange. Him sending her a screenshot of her triple text is a subtle neg that digs at her insecurities. She responded positively by qualifying herself, saying she's not crazy, but she could be crazy if he wanted that. Lots of qualifying and implications that she is attracted enough to him for him to determine what he wants her to be.
The problem with OP's text is the last bit about "all women being crazy." I mean, that's just a really really bad neg. First, she's already qualified herself to you. Second, it's a flat out insult. Third, it implies the OP has insecurities about women. I remember Roissy and a lot of other respectable PUA bloggers mentioning that women don't want to be around men they think are resentful or angry or bitter towards women. This neg was harsh and all around disrespectful. A good neg, and good alpha game in general, is charming, disaffected, and playful.
As for the aftermath, I think OP should just let it breathe for a bit. Then maybe follow up with something low key. Don't hint at you doing anything wrong. Maybe use some "vulnerability game" along the lines of "I've dated some crazy girls, but I like you because you've got a good head on your shoulders."
Most importantly, remember that this guy is in a FRESH relationship. He's already bedded her (I'm assuming that), he's already got the power. He can easily lose that power, but a pleasant "good morning" is not what would cause it.
Huh? You consider that a harsh neg? This isn't a stranger. He's been with her for a month. If a mild offhand comment like that, which is obviously a joke, results in a multi-day tantrum, he is obviously dealing with a loose cannon. She confirms as much with her multiple texts describing how "crazy" she is. This girl is obviously going to be a lot of make believe drama and she'll involve him in these dramas to the extent he continues to show a willingness to engage. That's why people are saying he needs to either cut her off or laugh off the nonsense. Otherwise, he is just spending time managing her nonsense (like he did in this case).
Your first points are quite possible. I don't know her well enough to know that yet. All I know is that all women have a tendency to go psycho, especially on their significant others if left unchecked.
Girlfriend angry with me (text convo attached) - Chewbacon - 03-27-2013
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:40 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:35 PM)Lemmo Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 08:29 PM)SHANbangs Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:40 PM)MattC Wrote:
Quote: (03-27-2013 07:10 PM)Knowledge Seeker Wrote:
I sent her a brief text just now saying I didn't mean my comment to come off as offensive and that I understood if she was upset. She texted 5 mins later and said she was over it. Like I had guessed, she was just waiting for me to reach out.
I appreciate the comments though. Situations like this makes me realize that I need to be more conscious of what I am sending, especially through text.
She's the type of girl that withdraws when her feelings are hurt. It's funny because she has a tough exterior but is a softy on the inside.
Noooo! No no no! NO!
You fed the hamster, you never feed the hamster!
I'm surprised it took 9 replies but Scorpion has highlighted your problem. What kind of text was that to start off the interaction. "Good morning, I hope you slept well". Seriously lad?
I get it, you like the chick but you will be in a constant tug of war with her for power and right now, you've just let go of the rope with that text.
You shouldn't have texted her 3 times in a row, and you should've replied "lol" after the jackass one then reinitiated a few days later as if nothing happened, assuming she didnt hit you up first.
If you want to progress with this chick you're gonna have to get good at outcome independence (search rational male's blog). Right now it's going downhill as she's baiting the beta in you.
Nah brah, you and a lot of guys on this thread on harping at the wrong thing. There was nothing wrong with his first text. Maybe the women u date have strong demand for alpha/hard game, but I think a customary "good morning, had a good sleep?" is fine in a relationship provided he is already banging the girl. Remember, a relationship implies the two of you are on the same team - much less need for a me vs. you confrontational dynamic.
Besides, I think OP was doing fine midway through this exchange. Him sending her a screenshot of her triple text is a subtle neg that digs at her insecurities. She responded positively by qualifying herself, saying she's not crazy, but she could be crazy if he wanted that. Lots of qualifying and implications that she is attracted enough to him for him to determine what he wants her to be.
The problem with OP's text is the last bit about "all women being crazy." I mean, that's just a really really bad neg. First, she's already qualified herself to you. Second, it's a flat out insult. Third, it implies the OP has insecurities about women. I remember Roissy and a lot of other respectable PUA bloggers mentioning that women don't want to be around men they think are resentful or angry or bitter towards women. This neg was harsh and all around disrespectful. A good neg, and good alpha game in general, is charming, disaffected, and playful.
As for the aftermath, I think OP should just let it breathe for a bit. Then maybe follow up with something low key. Don't hint at you doing anything wrong. Maybe use some "vulnerability game" along the lines of "I've dated some crazy girls, but I like you because you've got a good head on your shoulders."
Most importantly, remember that this guy is in a FRESH relationship. He's already bedded her (I'm assuming that), he's already got the power. He can easily lose that power, but a pleasant "good morning" is not what would cause it.
Huh? You consider that a harsh neg? This isn't a stranger. He's been with her for a month. If a mild offhand comment like that, which is obviously a joke, results in a multi-day tantrum, he is obviously dealing with a loose cannon. She confirms as much with her multiple texts describing how "crazy" she is. This girl is obviously going to be a lot of make believe drama and she'll involve him in these dramas to the extent he continues to show a willingness to engage. That's why people are saying he needs to either cut her off or laugh off the nonsense. Otherwise, he is just spending time managing her nonsense (like he did in this case).
Your first points are quite possible. I don't know her well enough to know that yet. All I know is that all women have a tendency to go psycho, especially on their significant others if left unchecked.
Perhaps "neg" is the wrong word for it. I think it's just a bad offhand comment. It doesn't really add any value that a good neg does - it just causes the female hamster to go into defensive lockdown mode. I'm generally of the view that you don't reveal, remark, or explain to women how fucked up they are. Their hamsters want to believe they are just fine. You popping that illusion just breeds resentment towards you. Better to just implement game and leave things unsaid. But in any case, it seems you've got this under control.
Maybe it's because I mostly date sweet girls (whom i end up hurting, unfortunately), but I don't use that much hard alpha game in a relationship. I'm generally a nice guy and I don't like to just be rude for the hell of it. I'd rather use other elements of game - mystery, wit, charm, and spontaneity - when I'm in a relationship. The girls generally tend to respond very positively, treat me very well, are deferential to me, buy me gifts, etc etc. And these are 7's and 8's, on the whole.