Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Printable Version
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Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Aliblahba - 03-10-2012
Thread after thread, I read about the importance of approaching women. Even some of the vet players here preach it constantly. I'm a little surprised. Being an approach isn't something you should be striving for. Now I'm gonna break down some next level shit.
Your goal, as a player, should be for women to approach you. Now yes, early in your player career, you'll need to approach. Why? Because your shit's not together yet. No one's told you how to work it. But now Uncle Ali-B is breaking it down.
Continue approaching, but every day of your life, you need to think, "how can I just stand here and have women come to me"? It takes time. The quickest place to start is style. Look around at what other guys are wearing. You need to be rocking something else. Go for edgy. And it might not hurt to let your hair grow out. Bishes love long hair.
Next is be funny, and cool. Don't worry about talking to your targets. Rap with the bartender, the waiter, and make the conversation interesting. I use a lot of apocalyptic shit, that shocks, but it works for me. What your creating is a "bubble" that women want to get into. She made need a little coaxing with some quick eye contact, but when your frame is right, she'll come.
Now what does this do? It weeds out the girls that won't fuck you. If a girl comes to you, she is interested. Simple. Now you've just taken a lot of work out of your life. Again, this is gonna take time, so start on it now.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - SimonRierdon - 03-10-2012
I appreciate your opinion, but if you really want women to approach you, there's no better way than to be dangerous. I agree with you about having your personal style together but without danger, you might just spend a lot of time posted up with no results. Unfortunately, danger isn't something that you can fake. Ex-cons have it and get mad trash pussy. For us normal guys that's a cred that only traveling into sketchy foreign countries can get you. If you've done it, there is a certain look in your eyes that women can see. I agree with you that when a girl approaches you, she's DTF, don't fuck that up, it's bad karma to mess up a sure thing unless she doesn't pass the boner test.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - soup - 03-10-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 03:18 PM)Aliblahba Wrote:
Thread after thread, I read about the importance of approaching women. Even some of the vet players here preach it constantly. I'm a little surprised. Being an approach isn't something you should be striving for. Now I'm gonna break down some next level shit.
Your goal, as a player, should be for women to approach you. Now yes, early in your player career, you'll need to approach. Why? Because your shit's not together yet. No one's told you how to work it. But now Uncle Ali-B is breaking it down.
Continue approaching, but every day of your life, you need to think, "how can I just stand here and have women come to me"? It takes time. The quickest place to start is style. Look around at what other guys are wearing. You need to be rocking something else. Go for edgy. And it might not hurt to let your hair grow out. Bishes love long hair.
Next is be funny, and cool. Don't worry about talking to your targets. Rap with the bartender, the waiter, and make the conversation interesting. I use a lot of apocalyptic shit, that shocks, but it works for me. What your creating is a "bubble" that women want to get into. She made need a little coaxing with some quick eye contact, but when your frame is right, she'll come.
Now what does this do? It weeds out the girls that won't fuck you. If a girl comes to you, she is interested. Simple. Now you've just taken a lot of work out of your life. Again, this is gonna take time, so start on it now.
Growing hair out might not work for balding guys..
The times that I've gone out properly peacocking (that is, rocking some flamboyantly fashionable piece of clothing), I did get a lot more attention and had girls coming up to me. It really does make things easier, but you need to have the vibe to back it up or it will come off as pretentious or incongruent.
I recently wore this jacket that my model chick friend lent me: http://postimage.org/image/i5y849lst/
Girls were approaching me a lot that night.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Chad Daring - 03-10-2012
I prefer an in-between method, I'm an opportunist. I'm not going up to some random girl across the room to say hi, but I'm not just waiting for girls to come to me either. I manipulate the situation so that we're in proximity.
Say there's a 20ft bar and about 10ft are open to walk up and grab a drink, I'll nonchalanty grab a drink right next to some girls. I wont "open" them per se, but rather wait till they say something easily commented on. A few weekends ago I did just that and a group of three latinas was sitting next to me as I ordered, and the one girl bought shots for everyone and the other said "you know I cant drink this, I dont like shots!" "Not this, its straight Jack!"
Same thing if you're moving across the bar, like if you're going to the bathroom. Pick a route that puts you in proximity to women, even (or maybe especially) if its not the easiest route to take.
Another favorite spot of mine is just on the event horizon of the dancefloor. For whatever reason the bars/clubs around here that have dancefloors, if you can dance a a guy, you get fuck all attention, vs just being in the area. So rather than diving right into dancefloor game (which doesn't work here despite following Samseau's wonderful guide) I'll stand just on the edge of the dancefloor, usually obviously in the way of people trying to leave. I'll step aside for the guys but stand firm when girls try to pass and give 'em a wink and a smile when they try to get upset about it
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - The Fantasist - 03-10-2012
^^ Nice jacket Soup,I love flamboyant garb like that and it can work great in the right places with the right attitude. I had a pair of sparkly gold shoes which chicks were always commenting on. The thing with that kind of gear is you have to wear it with total supreme confidence. I was recently in Kiev with a mate. He has a very individual look that chicks dig in London ( hard to describe but think of a modern day Sherlock Holmes ). Anyway in Kiev walking down the Kreschatic he stood out a mile,people were looking and laughing or pointing. Instead of puffing his chest and owning the stage like I told him to he totally went into his shell and physically shrunk into himself not making eye contact with people. For someone so confident in London it was interesting to see. Of course that ruined my approaches too as I was now walking around with a seemingly beta individual.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Roosh - 03-10-2012
You will not reach your potential if you wait to be approached. You can get laid, but the highest quality girls don't approach guys. They just don't.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - el mechanico - 03-10-2012
So what do you do if the bitches aren't approaching you? Change your clothes and come back?
[attachment=5287]
Soup was that you?^^^^^^^^^^
Now if you want to talk some peacocking gone right I'll give you this..
[attachment=5288]
Sometimes my kid takes her hairband off and I don't want to lose it so I put it on. I get approached and opened by fine girls nonstop when I wear it.
They giggle and just have to. Try it.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Sebastian - 03-10-2012
There are 4 ways.
1. Wait to be approached (to be honest, if it works for you, I am very jealous)
2. Wait for warm smile or eye contact and approach
3. Approach without any signs
4. Cold approach, get rejected and approach again
I am usually #2,3 guy. But this is what happend last weekend. I approached this one of the hottest chick at the club.(8.5~9)
Right after exchanging names, she told me she was here with friends.(meaning leave us alone) So I told her nice talking to you. I still felt good about myself because I pushed myself to approach such a hottie.
Later that night, I saw her again and went again. I got her # and set up 2nd date. We are going to hang out tonight.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Samseau - 03-10-2012
Sorry - disagree here. I go for the girls I want, not the other way around.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Hotwheels - 03-10-2012
Guys need to remember that they don't always open you when they approach.
If a hotbox sidles up next to you at the bar assume she is waiting for you to open her, even if she doesn't look at you. She's there for a reason.
Broads will put themselves into position to be opened much more than they will actually open you.
Approaching for broads is different basically because they have no idea how.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - WestCoast - 03-11-2012
I see your point, basically saying get your style in gear to gain confidence because women will approach you. Still agree with Roosh though the flyest women won't be approaching you unless you are T-pain
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - theIVth - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 11:05 PM)Hotwheels Wrote:
Guys need to remember that they don't always open you when they approach.
If a hotbox sidles up next to you at the bar assume she is waiting for you to open her, even if she doesn't look at you. She's there for a reason.
Broads will put themselves into position to be opened much more than they will actually open you.
Approaching for broads is different basically because they have no idea how.
This is very true
If a chick somehow ends up in your vicinity when you can reasonably deduce that she doesn't absolutely have to be, it's usually not by accident. When a chick smiles at you or holds eye contact longer than she needs to, it's usually not by accident. Girls are hypersensitive and aware of their personal space and of who they literally look at and acknowledge as oppose to just acting like you don't exist. It's funny to have to say it like this, but if a chick isn't acting seemingly totally oblivious to the fact that you even exist, she is probably interested in you if shes not obligated to talk to you or greet you.
And to the OP, I totally agree with Roosh in that top quality chicks are usually not going to approach you. 95% of the time u will have to man up and approach them
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - jerome - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 06:06 PM)Roosh Wrote:
You will not reach your potential if you wait to be approached. You can get laid, but the highest quality girls don't approach guys. They just don't.
Agree with Roosh,
if you don't need to approach girl theory, good looking guys are guarantee success. And would dominate the scene. Which is false.
Obviously good looking guys are not guarantee a hottee, because the hottest girls don't approach you. Sorry to tell you this. This is reality.
Daygame= you have to approach. girls will some time approach. But in reality the hotter girls, you will have to approach in day game also.
You cannot relay on luck.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Aliblahba - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 06:06 PM)Roosh Wrote:
You will not reach your potential if you wait to be approached. You can get laid, but the highest quality girls don't approach guys. They just don't.
I won't disagree with this. However, when girls are approaching, it makes others jealous. Like you said, women are like cats....and curiosity kills the cat.
Quote: (03-10-2012 11:05 PM)Hotwheels Wrote:
Guys need to remember that they don't always open you when they approach.
If a hotbox sidles up next to you at the bar assume she is waiting for you to open her, even if she doesn't look at you. She's there for a reason.
Broads will put themselves into position to be opened much more than they will actually open you.
Approaching for broads is different basically because they have no idea how.
This is why create the bubble. Now obviously, if you think she is interested, go ahead and say something. But I like them to open. Why cater to them? When girls approach, they are less likely to have bitch shields. After all, she is having to show an interest in you. You may well blow her outta the water.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - soup - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 06:41 PM)el mechanico Wrote:
So what do you do if the bitches aren't approaching you? Change your clothes and come back?
Soup was that you?^^^^^^^^^^
Now if you want to talk some peacocking gone right I'll give you this..
Sometimes my kid takes her hairband off and I don't want to lose it so I put it on. I get approached and opened by fine girls nonstop when I wear it.
They giggle and just have to. Try it.
Hells Yes.
But, seriously, I was on that night- girls were coming up to me to dance etc. I think the important thing is that you have to set yourself apart from all the other guys at the venue. You can do that with clothes, or you can do that with a good approach. I think it's really important to stand out.
Approaching is even more powerful during the day because a lot of guys don't do it.
With all the talk about Alpha/Beta, we don't hear much about "Sigmas." It sounds like these guys are the rebel types that stand out from the norm: http://www.antifeministtech.info/2010/01...ification/
Anyway, I'd classify myself as somewhat sigma. I'm always running solo and I usually go against the grain.
BTW I've been using the finger digit ratio routine a lot lately. It gets girls going like crazy. She'll be talking and then I just grab her hand and start inspecting her digits. Then I'll make a judgement, and let them go. They're always like "OMG do you read hands?" or "What does it say?" Pure chick-crack.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - MrXY - 03-11-2012
I don't see this as an either/or situation- why not use both tactics?
Your primary game should always be to do the approach yourself-there is just no substitute for this.
But I agree that you can use techniques- peacocking, social proof, high energy to draw girls into your orbit-this should be a supplement, not a replacement for approaching yourself
I get approached usually 2-3 times almost every time i go out (twice last night) but the problem is the approachers are usually not the quality i am seeking-typically they are 5s. Sometimes they are 6s or 7s which I consider a nice bonus but not something i can depend on.
The better looking girls and the shyer average ones will, as others pointed out, give you an approach invitation by standing near you, brushing up against you, or giving you eye contact. It's then up to you to accept the invitation
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Timoteo - 03-11-2012
"Growing hair out might not work for balding guys.."
However, shaving your head can create that same dangerous vibe, as long as you're rocking some kind of facial hair. If you don't have it up-top, you need it on your face somewhere.
"Guys need to remember that they don't always open you when they approach. If a hotbox sidles up next to you at the bar assume she is waiting for you to open her, even if she doesn't look at you. She's there for a reason. Broads will put themselves into position to be opened much more than they will actually open you. Approaching for broads is different basically because they have no idea how."
While it's true that for the most part attractive women won't come over and introduce themselves (one of the common complaints among the more beautiful set is that men are intimidated and don't come up to them, ask them out, etc.), this is the in-between, passive-aggressive move that some will employ if they have their eye on a guy they think is hot and really want to talk to, but for whatever reason he hasn't noticed them yet. They make sure to put themselves in his line of sight or personal space. Maybe even a glance or a smile. I laugh at women that talk about how strong and in control they are, or how they "go for what they want." Except when it comes to men. They'll see a guy they want to talk to, but do ZERO to make it happen.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - calex - 03-11-2012
From my experience, most girls WILL open you - usually by eye contact/smile, proximity or asking for a light. Every girl I asked confirmed this. But hot girls just don't approach, and I doubt any man who says that he bangs a lot that way.
Quote: (03-10-2012 03:48 PM)SimonRierdon Wrote:
I appreciate your opinion, but if you really want women to approach you, there's no better way than to be dangerous. I agree with you about having your personal style together but without danger, you might just spend a lot of time posted up with no results. Unfortunately, danger isn't something that you can fake. Ex-cons have it and get mad trash pussy.
If i'm reading this correctly, you believe that girls approach guys who look dangerous? If you do, i'm afraid that you've misinterpreted some Roissy's posts. Girls don't approach intimidating looking guys - because they are intimidated. Maybe a little bit wet to, but that's besides the point.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Timoteo - 03-11-2012
"From my experience, most girls WILL open you - usually by eye contact/smile, proximity or asking for a light. Every girl I asked confirmed this."
So we don't get into a discussion about what constitutes "opening," I think we're looking at what opening is from the male side. The kinds of things WE do and say to open girls. For the sake of making a distinction, I would call what you're talking about to be a "soft opening." It's more indirect, and a subtle way of showing interest.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - calex - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-11-2012 06:00 PM)Timoteo Wrote:
I would call what you're talking about to be a "soft opening." It's more indirect, and a subtle way of showing interest.
Agreed. It's also the most you'll get from quality girls - and that makes the OP's theory flawed from where i'm sitting.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Screwston - 03-11-2012
I don't think any guy should ever rely on this method. I've had girls approach me, but most girls won't do it. You have to at least get the ball rolling with them. They might finish it but you have to start it.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - oldnemesis - 03-11-2012
Quote: (03-10-2012 11:05 PM)Hotwheels Wrote:
Guys need to remember that they don't always open you when they approach.
If a hotbox sidles up next to you at the bar assume she is waiting for you to open her, even if she doesn't look at you. She's there for a reason.
True. When you run a non-approaching game, it is simply amazing to see what chicks do to push you to approach them. Sometime you can just feel like she screams inside your brain "how fucking blind those guys are! you stupid fuck, approach me, don't you see I'm here waiting for you?". Often she keeps the eye contact with you, then briefly looks at the seat near her then back at you. However this doesn't mean you have to. You can still stay your ground and non-verbally communicate that you see she's interested in you but you're not going to approach her, and she has to make the move. Just reflect her communication once.
And the older the chick is, the more likely she'll make the move so if you're interested in the 18-25 range, don't expect it. If you expect a lot of bangs, don't do it either. You'd probably get at least 3x more bangs if you approach. However this works very well if you're only interested in no-hassle bangs.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Giovonny - 03-13-2012
I love this concept, I agree with Ali 100%.
The times in my life when I was getting the most quality and quantity of p*ssy, I didn't have to approach. Let me repeat that....The times in my life when I was getting the most quality and quantity of p*ssy, I didn't have to approach.
For me, it was all about status and celebrity.
My name and picture was in the newspaper, they interviewed me on TV. I was recognized in the streets.
Girls would literally come up to me, smile, and hand me their number. It was like shooting fish in a barrel!
This was much easier then approaching girls and trying to convince them that I was "alpha". When you have social status and celebrity, you are "pre-selected" as an alpha. I you gotta do is not fuck it up!
Honestly, the best thing is to be on TV. I was on TV 3 or 4 times and each time I got like 10 groupies because of it. No bullshit..
This all the result of high school and college sports.
I mentioned this last year in this thread:
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-6480.html
I'm seriously considering spending less time working on my "Game" and my time working on my "Fame". I'm starting to think that working on my game is mostly a waste of time.
I am already at a intermediate level where I know how to hold a conversation with a strange woman and present myself as higher value then her. At this point, I think I would get a better return on my investment if I increased my local celebrity.
How will I do this?
Well, Something along the lines of these posts..
http://www.rooshv.com/how-to-build-your-...upie-harem
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-2056-page-2.html (GringoEd's post)
And, maybe its time to read this one, just to get some ideas flowing...
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-2687.html
And, I need to start using social media to my advantage. I have the dvd copies of when I was on TV. That will be the first thing I put up on my Facebook when I open an account! That is sure to get the juices flowing for these little honeys!
As I'm getting older, I'm realizing that the only Game I want to run is "Don't Fuck It Up" Game
Fame > Game!
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - soup - 03-13-2012
Quote: (03-13-2012 02:16 PM)Giovonny Wrote:
I love this concept, I agree with Ali 100%.
The times in my life when I was getting the most quality and quantity of p*ssy, I didn't have to approach. Let me repeat that....The times in my life when I was getting the most quality and quantity of p*ssy, I didn't have to approach.
For me, it was all about status and celebrity.
My name and picture was in the newspaper, they interviewed me on TV. I was recognized in the streets.
Girls would literally come up to me, smile, and hand me their number. It was like shooting fish in a barrel!
This was much easier then approaching girls and trying to convince them that I was "alpha". When you have social status and celebrity, you are "pre-selected" as an alpha. I you gotta do is not fuck it up!
Honestly, the best thing is to be on TV. I was on TV 3 or 4 times and each time I got like 10 groupies because of it. No bullshit..
This all the result of high school and college sports.
I mentioned this last year in this thread:
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-6480.html
I'm seriously considering spending less time working on my "Game" and my time working on my "Fame". I'm starting to think that working on my game is mostly a waste of time.
I am already at a intermediate level where I know how to hold a conversation with a strange woman and present myself as higher value then her. At this point, I think I would get a better return on my investment if I increased my local celebrity.
How will I do this?
Well, Something along the lines of these posts..
http://www.rooshv.com/how-to-build-your-...upie-harem
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-2056-page-2.html (GringoEd's post)
And, maybe its time to read this one, just to get some ideas flowing...
http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-2687.html
And, I need to start using social media to my advantage. I have the dvd copies of when I was on TV. That will be the first thing I put up on my Facebook when I open an account! That is sure to get the juices flowing for these little honeys!
As I'm getting older, I'm realizing that the only Game I want to run is "Don't Fuck It Up" Game
Fame > Game!
I believe that this systemic game is the next level if you want to brake into higher quality/quantity girls. Create a context in which the target comes to you.
Approaching a girl without giving away your intentions can be very tricky. That's why I usually hang at the bar and wait for girls to give me proximity. Or, if it's day game, using elderly opener is good for this.
But, I don't think you have to go all-out TV famous to get this up and running. The club promoters I know not only get surrounded by hot girls, they also get paid to do it. That said, you really have to be, for lack of a better word, cool, to pull this off. And, it can take up a lot of your time, so be prepared to make it a priority.
So, what does it mean to be cool? Rock-solid innergame, body language, and very good/stand-out fashion sense are the three things that come to my mind first.
I'm working on this kind of angle. It's not off the ground yet, so I still go out and out and do cold approaches, but I've seen it in effect.
Approaching is a Crutch-Strive for the Opposite - Samseau - 03-14-2012
Quote: (03-13-2012 02:16 PM)Giovonny Wrote:
As I'm getting older, I'm realizing that the only Game I want to run is "Don't Fuck It Up" Game
Fame > Game!
Although you're right in principle, this is like one of those discussions:
Which is better: Money or game?
Which is better: Looks or game?
In THEORY, having model level looks is better than game.
In THEORY, having 250K+ salary is better than game.
In THEORY, being watched by millions of people is better than game.
Game is only inferior than fame, looks, or money at extreme levels. But for guys without millions of fans, or a huuuuuge bank account, or looks that lands him modeling gigs - game is the better choice.
Not only will it get you more lays, but it will get you hotter girls. And, in the event that you do become famous, rich, or suddenly gorgeous - you'll have game on top of it, which guarantees you top-shelf pussy.
Finally, you can lose money. You can lose your fame. And all of our looks will fade.
But your game always remains...